<p>S has been accepted to a top 20 school, as well as lesser schools. He visited top school, but left with a less than favorable impression (too nerdy, anti- social, too cold weather). The school he likes the best is in the south and is ranked about 50th.
Is it nuts to push S to attend a school even if he THINKS he won't have a good college experience there if it is very highly ranked, and will likely provide a better career placement?</p>
<p>I think I know the school you are talking about - my daughter had the same reaction. She is now a sophomore at another school. I think that the kid can determine where they will be happy and it is crucial. My concern was if she was not happy she would not do well and she would blame me if I pushed a particular school. Seemed like a lose lose to me. She picked where she is - couldn’t be happier and is reflected in her grades. Weather was actually a big factor - all that sunshine made a difference for her! In our case both schools were top schools - but no matter where they go I think it is what the student accomplishes that matters - not so much the “name”. Good luck.</p>
<p>I would not pressure my child to pick a certain school based on the reason you describe. I would let him choose where he thinks he will be happiest.</p>
<p>Send him on an overnight to the higher ranked college to ensure his first impression was accurate. There are pros and cons to both choices. If he decides to transfer after the first year because he is unhappy he could lose any tuition discounts earned as merit scholarlships. And there are no guarantees that a better ranked colleges will produce a better career placement. Rankings have a certain degree of artificiality to them. Without knowing the colleges there might not be that much difference in the caliber of the education at a school “ranked” 20 and a school ranked “50.” Take a closer look at both schools. There are parents that believe fit is important and parents that don’t. There are kids that can settle in anywhere and kids that can suffer (emotionally and grade-wise) when they are unhappy. You know your student better than anyone so step back and really listen to what he is saying and what the reasons are.</p>
<p>I would ask that he not decline his acceptance until he has had another visit. I think this is fair. Try to visit on a sunny day when school is in session and it is not midterm or finals week.</p>
<p>That said I would not want to be in your shoes if he enrolled in that school and then hated it.</p>
<p>He has to be allowed to make the decision.</p>
<p>Think about it this way. How would you feel if you were interviewing for a job with, say, a Fortune 50 company and while you “liked” the job or the company on paper you just didn’t get a good vibe when you were inside the company interviewing and meeting people. Would you be inclined to accept a job with that company if you had an offer from another company for a similar position say Fortune 75 or 100 where everything clicked?</p>
<p>Definitely have him revisit the school where he had the initial vibe, but do stop and put yourself in his shoes in a context you can understand. BTW I am a parent that believes fit does have a place in the decision making process.</p>
<p>My S is rather adaptable, and his reasons are all non-academic in nature. We think his exposure to the school in an overnight visit was limited to the opinions of several current students. His opinions are based on heresay, and the school is diverse enough that he should be able to find plenty of social opportunities and the well rounded college experience he desires.
Has anyone followed through with this and had it turn out well?</p>
<p>My kid turned down a top 20 acceptance to attend an LAC ranked in the high 40s by US News. She is currently a junior, and she LOVES her choice. And she got excellent merit aid, and has a great GPA that will serve her well for admission to grad school should she choose to attend. She also has gotten very good internship opportunities. I am not concerned about her career placement – her professors seem to have some good connections in her chosen field, and since she is one of their best students, they have been very willing to help her with references and contacts. Neither she nor I have any regrets at all about her decision.</p>
<p>I should add that before going through her admissions process, I also subscribed to the “go to the highest ranked school you get into” philosophy. It was advice from my dad (who isn’t wrong very often). But I really think that if his preferred school is strong in his area(s) of interest that it could be the best choice for your S.</p>
<p>You mean he has already done an overnight visit, and spoken to lots of current students, and decided he doesn’t want to go there?</p>
<p>In my opinion you should let him live his own life.</p>
<p>In any case, it’s not Harvard he’s turning down. There would be a big difference between top 3 and top 20, but the difference between top 20 and top 50 isn’t huge.</p>
<p>Top 20-Top 50. Not a huge difference. Fit can be very important.</p>
<p>What a coincidence! Even the same choice of word.</p>
<p>I would have a hard time with this if the academic quality is much lower at the schools he likes better. But I do agree that you should not push him too hard.</p>
<p>I know one kid who chose Cornel solely based on rankings (“best school he got into”). It was his choosing, not his parents, but the only factor he considered was the ranking.
The school turned out to be a terrible fit - too big and impersonal, the weather too cold and gloomy, etc. As a result he did poorly enough the first year that transfer was not an option. He ended up graduating after 6 or 7 years with a less-than optimal GPA, after taking leave of absence due to depression twice, and finishing the last semester through on-line classes because he just could not bring himself to go back there.
I am pretty sure that a lower ranked school with better fit would have been a much smarter choice in his case.</p>
<p>Prestige is over-rated. Let him follow his instincts.</p>
<p>If finances are not an issue I’d let the student choose. No real difference in academic challenge and your son may resent being sent to a school that’s not his choice.</p>
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<p>Yes actually, I think it is nuts. Within certain parameters, doing well at a school is more important than it’s ranking. Because college is hard, it’s hard to do well if you’re not happy. You can lose focus, your mind wanders and one can get depressed. Your son has to live his own life and make his own choices and his own mistakes. It’s best if you help him learn how to make those choices himself, but not actually make them for him and also respect any choices he does make. This is not likely to be a mistake, but even if it is, it’s not likely to be a big one. If he’s already done his due diligence in good faith, visited the higher ranked school, decided that it wasn’t a good environment for him, and also visited and done the same due diligence on the lower ranked and then decided that the lower ranked school was preferable, then that should be the end of the story, and the higher ranked school should be discarded. Also, it’s only December, so if there are other schools in the running that he hasn’t applied to yet, it’s certainly not too late to add to the mix, avoiding those traits in the higher ranked school that he didn’t like.</p>
<p>On an issue of school choice, I’d leave that mostly up to your son as he’s the one who will be spending 4 years there. </p>
<p>Moreover, though I did look at USNWR, I never paid attention to the overall rankings because it places too much weight on superfluous factors that IMHO have little impact on the academic strengths in practice such as alumni giving rate (obscures excellent schools where most graduates enter public service/socially oriented occupations such as social work, NGOs, academia, and teaching K-12 rather than Wall Street or the Fortune 500) and high school counselors ratings (For some, there could also be an unreasonably strong bias for or against a given school. For instance, my GC who had a strong bias against BC being defined solely as a “party school” to the point of strongly discouraging an upperclassman with Ivy stats from applying there even though he LOVED BC. Said student ended up being miserable at UPenn from what I heard from those in his graduating class. Same GC also equated SUNY Binghamton with Berkeley which I felt was absurd. While Binghamton is a respectable school…it doesn’t come close to Berkeley academically.).</p>
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<p>While it may be hearsay to you, information from current students or those who are no more than 2 years out about a given college should be taken quite seriously as that’s the closest current and honest information you can get. </p>
<p>In fact, I make it a point to tell every high school kid applying to college to talk to current students and recent alums no more than 2 years out so they have the most current information which is more likely to pertain to them than alums who may provide outdated info because they’ve been out too long, admissions officers who have an interest in protecting their yield rate, and USNWR whose interest is maintaining perceptions of it being a good ranking source so they could sell more college ranking guides. </p>
<p>If he’s meeting many students who are miserable, that is actually quite damning possible evidence that school may not be the best educational environment for your son…or possibly anyone else.</p>
<p>Was he accepted ED to the Top 20 school? I’m just guessing that because of the timing of this question. ED changes the equation somewhat, as there is a commitment to attend if accepted.</p>
<p>Hopefully not, because then there would be an ED at a school the student didn’t like. The total opposite of what ED is all about. First choice, love the school, finances in line. If there is a hanging ED, the student needs to call ASAP, if the student articulates why he made a mistake applying ED (before he visited, etc. etc.) hopefully he’ll be released.</p>
<p>He’s going to college and it should NOT be totally based on the ranking of the school. Your kiddo has to live there. It needs to be his choice…and the rankings of the school should not be pushed on him as the top criteria.</p>
<p>At the one that they think would make them happy, when the going gets tough they won’t eat crow and they will take responsibility. At the other one, when the going gets tough you’ll be the first to know. Constantly. There’s a lot to say for a happy, responsible, well adapted college student. In any case, it’s early and many other ingredients can be added to the casserole before April 1.</p>