<p>Very well stated FLVADAD. As a parent who just sent her firstborn off to college this year, I will be frequently reflecting on the wisdom you expressed.</p>
<p>FLVADAD, great post. I hope the OP reads it, absorbs it, and be proud of the many decisions his daughter will make with or without him.</p>
<p>FLVADAD, what a wonderful, reflective post. I'm gonna read it again.</p>
<p>Thanks to all. Here is the best site on the Internet about the various colleges our children are considering. Instead of hearing mostly from parents, this site is all students, mostly CURRENT students. I cruised the site this morning. It was very helpful to me for thinking about Lehigh. A couple of students say things exactly in line with my stereotypes and fears, but others had different opinions. They were fresh, young and honest, coming from experiences of current students. You know which state the students are from, whether they lean politically left, right or center, and what goes on with the dating scene. They tell you the good with the bad. I even learned which buildings students tend to pee on at night at one particular college. I actually feel better about Lehigh after checking this new site. Not a lot better, but better. The student write-ups are, obviously, more frank and honest than their videos. </p>
<p>I also checked out student opinions about other schools like Oberlin (big thumbs up, now!). I can't wait till my D gets home from school today and I can introduce her to this site. Then I will step back and stay out of her decision-making. Most schools even have photos of campus, videos of students talking, in addition to some very thorough site and student write-ups. One female Asian-American student's write-up of Swarthmore was absolutely hilarious. I know I can't post the link, so know that the site is spelled U-N-I-G-O dot com. I read about it this week in the NYTimes College Issue.</p>
<p>After checking out this new site, I'm now at peace because I have a much more complete picture of Lehigh and other schools without relying on administration propaganda.</p>
<p>Re post #100: As a native New Englander, born and bred in Fairfield County, CT, I object to the characterization of "northeasterners." The kids in the article are New Yorkers. Not only that, but they are a subset of New Yorkers. And like most such articles, it is written to create controversy and entertain, not to genuinely explore. I strongly doubt that most students from NY/NJ, even the former preppies, have a Lexus with vanity plates.</p>
<p>I am not familiar with that site, but I wouldn't discount the advice you have received here on THIS site or the wealth of information contained here. That said, no one can make decisions for YOUR particular family and I wouldn't hang too much on what you read on the internet- here or elsewhere. You are still setting some rigid parameters for your daughter's college search, which means you are going to overlook some wonderful schools.</p>
<p>There is a lot of wisdom in this thread, especially in FLVADAD's comment.</p>
<p>About New Yorkers attending Indiana U. There's always more to the story. My niece, an open-minded and kind young woman who grew up in a biracial household of modest means in NY, is now thrilled to be a freshman there.</p>
<p>Let me break into this serious discussion with a funny personal experience about Minnesota.</p>
<p>Driving on my way to graduate school back east in the mid-1980s, my traveling companion's car broke down with a flat near Moorhead, Minnesota. We were heading to different locations, which is why we each had our own vehicle in our little 2-car caravan. When I finally noticed that I hadn't seen her in the rear view mirror for a few miles, I turned around and found three police officers changing her tire; a state trooper, a county sheriff and the local constabulary. The officers were all quite pleasant and asked us how our trip was coming along. When we explained that we wanted to take a couple of hours to sight-see in Minneapolis (we'd never been to Minnesota before), the county sheriff was nearly horrified and said; "Whoa...Minneapolis? I'd keep going straight through if I were you. That place is Soddom and Gammorah."</p>
<p>Having done my undergrad studies in New York City, it was all I could do to keep from bursting out with laughter.</p>
<p>Plainsman - Good to know. I also saw that article in the Times, but couldn't access their website at the time. Will show it to S2, who is also starting the college search.</p>
<p>He he! Anybody noticed that "mixed chicks" ad on the left? Imagine there being a market for that!</p>
<p>Lake Washington: Very funny anecdote about Minnesota. Sounds like my in-laws. They live in a small town (where my wife was born and grew up) in southwestern Minnesota. When we visited, mine was the only black face within a radius of 100 miles in any direction. Everyone in that town though Minneapolis and St. Paul were Soddom and Gomorrah. You can't blame them. The biggest city most of them had ever seen other than the Twin Cities was Omaha, Nebraska. LOL. </p>
<p>Ispf72: I was back on that site today, checking several schools, including Lehigh. Of all the schools I checked Lehigh had the highest percentage of students who identified themselves as politically "center" or "right." It was an interesting contrast to, for example, Wesleyan. Actually, the two schools were opposites. Almost every kid at Wesleyan identified himself/herself as "left." No, that's not exactly a scientific study, but it is consistent with everything I've read about both schools from a variety of sources.</p>
<p>I'm quite familiar with Lehigh (H. and I are alums) and have visited Wesleyan (my father's alma mater), and in general I agree. While I wouldn't necessariily put Lehigh on the opposite end of the social and political scale from places like Wesleyan, Vassar, Oberlin, etc. I definitely would place it and Bucknell quite a bit farther to the right. </p>
<p>Despite my arguing with you along the way here, we were also leery of the drinking culture and frat scene at Lehigh. It was not something S1 was interested in anyway, though, so there were no family disagreements.</p>
<p>If you are willing to venture a bit farther from home, into New England, I think you'd find some more "in-between" schools that might fit your and your daughter's taste. I can't say enough about Tufts and the mix of kids there, and it attracts a wonderfully socially active student body. Also, I'm not sure of her stats, but what about Brown?</p>
<p>Parents of daughters are probably more concerned about schools w/ a reputation of heavy drinking and big greek presence. There was a CC thread discussing the Rolling Stones article <a href="http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parent-cafe/198480-sexual-mores-college-circa-2006-a.html%5B/url%5D">http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parent-cafe/198480-sexual-mores-college-circa-2006-a.html</a> after the Duke study on campus drinking. I applaud the DU administration for confronting the problem and spending $$$$ to change it. The comments from some of the girls who felt compelled to drink and hook-up w/ the frat boys made me want to cry.</p>
<p>
[quote]
Girls reduce themselves a lot here
.-which is hooking up with several guys in the course of a weekend, including one, a regular who really treats her like ****.
..But, you know, shes doing it out of fear, says Anna, smiling a bit. Its like, Oh, yes
And maybe hell invite me to this big frat formal thats coming up that everyone wants to go to.
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I have done things that are completely inconsistent with the type of person I am, and what I value.
..She hooked up with a guy in a high - profile fraternity for more than a year
When youre in a relationship with somebody, especially with some body in the frat scene, youre lucky to be with him, Its never the other way around, she says no matter how smart or attractive the girl.
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If my mother ever knew she says, I mean, she would smack me across the face, I was not brought up in that kind of environment.
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<p>Ugh - how depressing!
I can't help but wonder about these girls, though. Was it really the fact that these guys were fraternity members that made them magically lose their self-respect? Are there no other social offerings for them at Duke? And I'm saying this as someone who NOT a particular fan of Greek-heavy campuses.</p>
<p>I'd bet in some cases you could change 'frat member' to football player, young Wall Street bigshot, misc. club member, etc. and theses girls might have acted the same way (sadly). By the time our daughters get to college I hope they'll have the self-respect and intelligence to avoid that sort of situation altogether. And how unhealthy for the guys in the article too -- the sense of entitlement they must get from these girls. Blehh.</p>
<p>My D (Black, no Halle Berry, but a "good girl in the Biblical sense", who might debate the technical appropriateness of that description ), a Freshman at Duke, has not described anything reflecting the girls quoted in post #133. Of course it's only been 6 weeks, but she has found more than enough ( for me anyway; hello?!? What about classes?? ) alternatives to socializing at presumably Anglo ( is that a slur? I hope not..) frat parties. "We" preferred a Universities' size, to an LAC, partly for that reason.</p>
<p>I agree. S. has a HS classmate at Duke who is world's away from the girls in this article. I don't know what the girls mentioned here were like before arriving on campus, but I doubt they changed overnight like Jekyll and Hyde.</p>
<p>My D DID volunteer that the freshman boys did seem more "full of themselves", while the upper classmen seem to have "gotten over" themselves.</p>
<p>Now my D wants to go to Lehigh! She said, "why go to a liberal school where everything is fine? I'd rather go somewhere to combat racism and prejudice. Someplace where I'm needed like Lehigh." I think she's making a big mistake. Lehigh is the school that just hosted John McCain and Sarah Palin, two despicable characters! They were on campus this week! How horrible! When has Lehigh had Barack Obama on campus? What kind university is this? I told you folks it is a very conservative school.</p>
<p>I've got to talk some sense into my D.</p>
<p>Yep- pretty despicable to be running for President of the United States. Imagine having those horrible people on a college campus so that the students might have an opportunity to be exposed to what they have to say. I think you and your family should stay away from conservative Lehigh! Good for your daughter for being open-minded and adventurous. Time for you to shut down the propellers. My son happens to be an economic conservative and he was thrilled to be able to go to one of the Democratic candidate debates. It's called learning and it's what college is about.</p>
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Now my D wants to go to Lehigh! She said, "why go to a liberal school where everything is fine? I'd rather go somewhere to combat racism and prejudice. Someplace where I'm needed like Lehigh."
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<p>Good for your daughter!</p>
<p>
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Lehigh is the school that just hosted John McCain and Sarah Palin, two despicable characters! They were on campus this week! How horrible! When has Lehigh had Barack Obama on campus? What kind university is this? I told you folks it is a very conservative school.
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</p>
<p>I'm an Obama supporter, but I would consider going to see a McCain / Palin appearance. Never hurts to broaden one's horizons, you know.</p>