Rate my essay (again)? (1-6)

<p>*I know some people might say to make the essay longer...but my essay filled up both sides...I'm not sure what else to do...tips please </p>

<p>We need other people in order to understand ourselves. Not only when we see other people’s action that we judge ourselves and look upon our own behavior. This concept can be demonstrated by Marlow in “The Heart of Darkness” and Claudius in “Hamlet”
Marlow ventures out into the Congo in order to search for Kurtz, a revered ivory collector. While Marlow is in the Congo, he hears much praise about Kurtz and eventually becomes obsessed with finding this man. When he finally meets the man that he has put so high on a pedestal, he is shocked at Kurtz’s true character. He finds that Kurtz is a bitter, greedy and selfish individual. He thinks of nothing other than dominance over the natives and the ivory that he so cherishes. Marlow realizes how corrupt a man can become and how his morals and values are quite different from Kurtz’s
On Kurtz’s last dying breath he tells Marlow to “kill the brutes” and dies with much horror in his eyes. Marlow realizes how tainted Kurtz really is and to what extent their characters foil. After such an incident Marlow swears to never again get caught up in such greed. Through Kurtz he better understands himself and his want to preserve his innocence which was almost lost.
“Hamlet” by Shakespeare likewise demonstrates this key idea. Claudius, the new king is also Prince Hamlet’s uncle. He receives this post by poisoning the former king and seducing the king’s wife. Hamlet, well aware of this horrendous fact puts on a play. This play recounts the story of the murder in Hamlet’s attempt to get Claudius to show signs of guilt or remorse. His plan succeeds as Claudius angrily leaves. The king goes to the chapel where he prostrates on the ground. Feelings of guilt that he had not formally experienced overcome him as he is forced to look upon his own disgusting behavior. Through Hamlet Claudius understands the vile villain that he really is.
In conclusion, in order to truly understand ourselves, we need other people to reflect our characters and personalities. Had Kurtz not been in existence, Marlow would not have realized his own true character. The same idea goes along with Claudius’s guilty reaction. Through others, we can understand how we really are.</p>

<p>4/6</p>

<p>Your score is brought down by awkward structures and grammar errors. Try to shoot for 3 examples. Also, try to talk equally about each topic. Your HoD description is far longer than your Hamlet one, making the latter seem rushed in the initial paragraph and in the conclusion.</p>