Rate my SAT essay!!!!

Test Preparation
1

<p>Assignment: Do we need other people in order to understand ourselves?</p>

<p>My Essay:
Anne Shepard wrote that, “A better understanding of other people contributes to the development of moral virtues. We shall be both kinder and fairer in our treatment of others if we understand them better. Understanding ourselves and understanding others are connected, since as human beings we all have things in common.” This excerpt from Aesthetics: An Introduction to the Philosophy of Art, is trying to convey the message that in order for people to more empathetic to the needs and the rights of others, we must take time to understand others ourselves. Not only will understand others achieve “fairer treatment” for others, but we also start to understand ourselves better. I completely agree that we need other people in order to understand ourselves better. People have achieved this method of understanding themselves better through their interaction with others in both experiments and in school.
In the novel, Nickel and Dime, a journalist goes undercover to see the reality of medium waged jobs. Through her journey she comes across a large number of people who go through harsher mental and physical work than the people she knows in “higher” and more “elite” fields. Although they worked just as hard, if not harder, than the people who knew carrying six figure incomes, they were not entitled to the same liberties nor income. The realities of a medium waged life were flabbergasting to this journalist. She no longer felt that impoverished people were just lazy and that they deserved what they received. Through her interactions with them she was able to turn her views and treatment of the lower-class around.
In public school students come across all types of people. In certain classes views on topics such as abortion, religion, and other controversial issues are discussed. Subjects that some students never took a view on or through about are now brought before them. The student’s view on a matter has the chance to be created or even molded through this interaction. A student can hear others views on matters which may give him or her new insight on a topic. Your views and decisions on topics makes you who you are and knowing why someone else may do something, even if you yourself would not personally do it, helps you to understand and revere others.
When we live in arrogance we are only hurting ourselves. Until we open up to interactions with others or live in someone else’s shoes can we not only understand others better but ourselves too. How can we ever make smart decisions when we do not know all the possibilities? The truth is we cannot. As humans we all have feelings and have a voice inside ourselves that tells u to do “the right thing.” That is why we must understand others in order to not offend others. In order to understand ourselves better we must have interaction with other people. </p>

<p>thanks so much!!!!!!!!</p>

2

<p>Please rate it! I'll give you a cookie :)</p>

3

<p>You use the passive voice a bit too much, and it could possibly be a little longer. Good job.</p>

<p>What? A u? Why? Did you honestly use "u" in place of "you" on the actual essay? EWWW!!! 4 at best.</p>

<p>Ok, if you did that as a typo, then 5/6 ish</p>

4

<p>lol well i wrote in pencil bc i know on the computer i write faster so it would be more realisitc...and then i retyped it so it was definitely a typo. I wouldn't ever do that on the real thing.</p>

<p>thanks for your input</p>

5

<p>Just run it through MS Word first or a similar spellchecker in order to make any proper corrections first :)</p>

<p>Also, when you say you rate it as a '4, 5, or 6' is this out of a 10 in total?</p>

<p>And to the original poster, what did you score for this essay on the SATs?</p>

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<p>i thought its a double score... like 6 and 6 but total 12. so 4 would make it an 8..</p>

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<p>Double score? Erm, okay; got a link to explain more about it?</p>

8

<p>Two people give your essay a score from 0-6, making for a maximum score of 12.</p>

9

<p>this is a practice one from the book that's why I wanted to know what I would score if this was the real thing. you can go on collegeboard.com if you want to see all the rules and everything</p>

10

<p>pepgirl girl i have two thing for u to tell u first: when u start a new paragraph u have to leave a space before u right for example
we need other people to understand ourselves. See the space i left.
second: u can’t wirte u in the Essay of the SAT.</p>

11

<p><3 ■■■■■■. Just as a tip for the actual essay: while you have very little time to be original, don’t be so blatantly cliche:

… it’s a very boring opening that the readers see thousands of times… and you don’t want your readers to be bored. 9/12</p>