Read my personal essay? Please?

Could anyone please read my personal essay and provide me with honest and blunt criticism/feedback? I just want to make sure that I am on the right track or not.

I’m applying for the Biological Sciences major in CALS. In my personal essay, I wrote about how classical music shaped me into the student and person I am today. Sounds cliche, but I wrote it in a unique way… At least I think it’s pretty different. Thank you!

I will read it. Parent here.

Bump!