<p>He isn’t likely to get into Vandy as a transfer with 2.8. I think you need to take schools like that off the list, they are not realistic. You get one shot at a school like that, and he has had his (and could have another shot at it if he were willing).</p>
<p>If he did decide to try again (and maybe the choice between lower ranked state schools and Pomona might motivate him to try it again), I am not sure he could take ALL his classes at Pitzer. My kid goes to another of the consortium colleges, and her college has some limits on how many you have to take on their campus. Now Pomona may have a different rule set, you would have to check that out if he were even interested. But it sounds like he isn’t.</p>
<p>I have to ask, is HE interested in going back to school?</p>
<p>Intpar, I think his biggest nightmare right now (other than Pomona) is to not have any other prospects than living at home. He is completely aware of the stigma and wants to take some kind of action. He wants a family someday, a real job, etc. </p>
<p>All is certainly not lost; he is only 23. He has lots of time to reinvent himself and find a way to finish school, but has certainly made it harder on himself. It sounds like you have been very supportive of your son and that he is now ready for college or at least to try. But, as others have said, if he is not really ready to go back, still has some emotional issues, or is not willing/able to work hard, he may be better off waiting a bit longer. </p>
<p>With such minimal income, your son may be eligible for financial aid at some private colleges. Some do give FinAid for transfer students. He also may have better luck with admissions at a smaller schools with more holistic admission review so he can explain why he left Pomona. If something happened at Pomona, it is too bad he is not willing to talk about it. But it could also be that he just is unhappy with what he did there, not that something traumatic happened - especially if he has been in therapy. </p>
<p>Your son may revise his opinion of Pomona once he finds out what his other options are. Is it definite he can keep his scholarship there? If not, it is probably unlikely he will be able to return due to cost even if he wants to. </p>
<p>Other options to consider: Can he finish up in Mexico at the school where he is teaching? Can he get a job at a US college and get free tuition? Work part-time and go to school too (and take longer to finish)? If you go back to your home in Florida, can you afford to live there while he finishes school? If you have legally rented your home there, it may be hard to claim residency and so, again, may have to look to private college. Or move to the States by the end of the year to re-establish residency by January 2016 (picking a state with a lower cost in-state college)? He may be able to take a class or two before enrolling full time. It seems like your family has to figure out where you can live on your income while he goes to school and go from there. </p>
<p>Your son probably needs to figure out what his major is going to be and how he can accomplish that with the least number of classes and least cost. If he has no idea, maybe he needs to think about career options that don’t involve college - at least at this point in his life. </p>
<p>Edited to add: As I was writing this (and got distracted) other posts came in that may make some of this irrelevant. But too tired to re-write. It sounds like he should be considered a FL resident, since he was in Mexico on a tourist visa and you still have a residence there but the college will decide. Certainly may be easier if he moves there sooner rather than later. </p>
<p>Lots and lots of people without college degrees don’t live at home. If he’s going to be in his 4th or 5th semester of college and he’s 24 years old, and he doesn’t have a preferred major or a target career, that’s very troubling. I’m also concerned that he isn’t the one researching options and asking for advice.</p>
<p>I hate to say this…but the cost of living in the Claremont area is very high. How would you afford that?</p>
<p>But he does not want to return to Pomona…so that is that. And if that is the case, he solid not return to Pomona. </p>
<p>If he has been seeing the same counselor for three years, with no results, I would be switching counselors…ASAP.</p>
<p>My son lives in his own place, earns his own living and does just fine. To be honest, he does not need a college degree for some of what he does (he does for some of his work). </p>
<p>Your son could earn a decent wage, and support himself, living independently doing any number of service jobs.</p>
<p>ETA…your parent income isn’t exactly a fortune. He should be able to see that he can live independently without earning a ton of money. You do!</p>
<p>He can move to live with his sister, work for a year, get his state residence, and then start back to college part time at the closest public U while working enough to pay for his living expenses. If he only studies part-time to begin with, it won’t matter that he doesn’t know his major yet. He also might be able to enroll in non-degree status for a few of those courses so that he can demonstrate to the U where he’s studying that he does have his act together academically. He needn’t apply for transfer just yet. </p>
<p>Would it be possible for your son to obtain a degree at a Mexican university? If not, New College of FL might be a possibility for him. It is small and quirky, but it’s public and your son would get in-state tuition if he were accepted. </p>
<p>Even if some of these community college classes don’t transfer, I think it would be a confidence-builder and prove to himself and his parents that he’s ready to go back to school. I vote move to TN, live with sister, work and ease back into academia. Being bilingual will help him land a job.</p>
<p>One more thought. My son’s friend also left his college and could not go back. He is a smart kid, but was not cut out for college at that point. He went to Army language school and then served little over two years in a non-combat overseas post. He will be leaving the Amy soon and then going on to college, and I think will be studying language. He gets the GI bill for tuition and has certainly grown up a lot. Not a good option for a lot of kids, but just something to consider. </p>
<p>If he attended two years at Pomona, he should see how many classes a FloridA community college would accept and aim to recieve an assc of arts or assoc of science certificate.
Then an instate school may allow him to transfer as a junior. ( and it may give him time to earn residency)</p>
<p>We don’t have to live in Claremont. We could live next door in Pomona in a 2 bedroom apartment. Would just need to keep it around $1300/month. I have to check, but I think it’s possible. We just had a long talk. It sounds like he might be leaning toward living mostly off campus (scholarship includes room and board) and taking as many possible classes at the other colleges that he can get away with. (This totally says to me the problem is with the Pomona campus and the problem wasn’t a student.) He’s going to give it some more thought. I also presented the idea of him living with his sister and easing back into school after he has established residency. He’s not against that idea either. </p>
<p>I think his scholarship is still solid because he was a Questbridge Scholar. I don think he’s the first one to not complete a degree within the prescribed time under that program. They want these kids to make it. </p>
<p>He could go to a Mexican Uni. I always thought he would. His take on it is that it would just make whatever he’s studying that much more difficult. </p>
<p>Hanna, he hung around when I composed the initial post. He would have said it all a lot better than I could for sure, but I just feel at this point that I’ve left things in his hands for awhile now and nothing is happening. His defense mechanisms run from denial to avoidance. </p>
<p>Good luck to you and your son. It is so difficult when a kid does not stay on the path. I hope he can get back to Pomona with his scholarship and deal with whatever the issue was. True that studying in Spanish would be harder for a non-native speaker. It is certainly not completely unheard of for a parent to help a kid of 23 with information to figure out his next step.</p>
<p>As a Pomona student and a low income student myself, it really pains me to read of your son’s situation. I can’t speak of why your son might feel uncomfortable since college experiences can be so different, so I offer this only as a source of comfort that perhaps you can talk to him about. Over the last few years the school has developed their orientation programs and mental health resources because they are becoming aware of what a tough transition it can be here. They are really pushing away from the “happiest students in the country” attitude that they had a few years ago because they realize what a terrible environment apathy can create for some people. They also reworked the grade dispute policy so that students have more power in this situation- very recently, just a week ago actually.</p>
<p>Pomona will want him back with open arms and will guarantee that full scholarship for 4 more semesters- and even if he needs a few more semesters, the financial aid policy will include a few loans (5500 per year) but will still be cheaper than attending most schools. If it were the people that prevent him from wanting to return, 5 years later and the whole campus will have new students. The low income support networks have become a lot more powerful recently. If it’s Pomona he feels uncomfortable at, he can arrange for off-campus living at one of the other 3 colleges (Pitzer, CMC, Mudd) for no extra charge.</p>
<p>There is potential in his returning to Pomona as a new slate. He can start a new major altogether since none of the majors take more than 2 years. And students like I would be the first to make sure he thrives. But at the same time, if he doesn’t believe he’d feel comfortable even with these avenues, he should not be forced to go to a route that’ll make things worse for him. Please PM me if he or you want to reach out to me.</p>