Revised common app short answer writing

<p>Eleven years of emergency conditioning, rescue training, and trailblazing all led up to this, the zenith of my scouting career; my Eagle project. In order to receive my Eagle Scout badge I had demonstrate my abilities as a scout by planning, financing, and directing a project for the benefit of my community. The planning, which entailed signature gathering and supply estimating was the easiest part, financing however, was a different matter. My project, which entailed completely rebuilding wooden partitions used by a local homeless shelter, took seven months of cup shaking to fund. Directing the project was hands down the highest hurdle to jump; for it meant transforming over thirty friends and family members into expert carpenters and painters. Although at times it seemed like I would never finish my project, which took me over two years to complete, I don’t regret a single moment I spent on it.</p>

<p>sounds better than your last version...</p>

<p>the thing that jumped out at me: you repeated the word "entail"</p>

<p>i agree with madison. it is good that you tried for a hook, but it didn't quite work.</p>

<p>Watch out for punctuation, too.</p>

<p>"the zenith of my scouting career; my Eagle project." --> career: my </p>

<p>"The planning, which entailed signature gathering and supply estimating was the easiest part, financing however, was a different matter." --> part. Financing, however,</p>