Hi,
So I met this girl at orientation and we decided that we would dorm. I soon asked her for the classes she was taking and she didn’t respond, I dropped it. She texted me about 4-5 days later and when I responded, she stopped. It continued to go on like this until we got our finalized room assignments and she was my roommate. We started texting and she was responding and then when I asked what class she was taking, she stopped replying. I get why she didn’t reply the first couple of times(probably busy), but when I ask about classes she doesn’t reply.
Is there any reason why she isn’t replying.
Are you texting her in all caps with no punctuation and texting again after three minutes when she hasn’t replied?
I’m texting normally with emojis, I don’t double text.
Why is it so important for you to know what classes she’s taking?
I understand, you are just trying to communicate with your new roommate and establish a relationship. Asking what classes she is taking is normal ice breaker. It may be nothing (she isn’t much of a texter or maybe her parents take her phone away as a consequence from time to time) or it could be that she isn’t coming to college after all or that she’s not so great socially. Although I would think you would have picked up on that at orientation if that were the case. Time will tell. In the meantime focus on your own college preparations and remember you and the roommate only need to be able to share the space respectfully and don’t have to be best friends. Sometimes those are the best living situations.
She may be having phone issues.
She may be working a bazillion hours…and there are people who don’t text at work.
She may be nervous about leaving home.
Grandma or her dog may be sick.
Her boyfriend may have dumped her because he doesn’t want a long distance relationship.
And that’s off the top of my head 5 minutes after getting up.
Don’t read too much into this OK?
I agree with @bjkmom . You don’t know each other. There is no reason to assume any kind of problem. You guys will be roommates and will get to know each other soon enough. If you have questions about who might be bringing a fridge or similar, then ask specifically and I am sure you will get a response.
Maybe your roommate is having an issue with classes. Maybe she can’t get what she wants and is working on it. Maybe she isn’t happy with what she is in and is trying to change it. Since you have asked about classes twice and it seems to scare her away, maybe you shouldn’t ask about classes anymore.
Maybe she is thinking about changing her major and doesn’t know what classes she will be taking.
Maybe she doesn’t like to text.
Maybe she’s on vacation.
Maybe she just doesn’t like to text.
Maybe she’s either taking remedial or honors classes and doesn’t want to be judged by her class schedule by someone she doesn’t know well.
MODERATOR’S NOTE:
I have edited the header to eliminate the screaming, but not the punctuation and spelling errors.
This happens all the time. Chill out…soon you will meet.
There are also some workplaces which prohibit any use of personal electronics while on the worksite for institutional security reasons and will mandate all staff to check them in before entering the worksite/offices and only allow checking out if one’s going outside for breaks or when going home for the day.
At some such workplaces I’ve worked in, that could mean one may not be accessible via cell/text or internet for as long as 6+ hours due to the nature/pacing of the work.
She might want to establish a little distance, by discouraging you from excessive and incessant texting.
Why do you need to know her classes?
You’re probably coming off as really strong.
Just calm down. Text if you need to about room things- like a fridge. Otherwise, you’ll be living with her soon so chill.
I didnt demand to know her classes. I only want to know because we’re the same pre-health profession, so I wanted to know if I was on the right track and if we’d have the same workload. I dont want to be rude staying up studying when she doesn’t have to and then waking up early and having to wake her up.
It will all work itself out. Relax. You don’t want to come off as too pushy or overbearing before you even meet.
It is nice you are concerned about keeping her up. Buy a small lamp so you can study without having all the lights on. Buy earphones if you like to listen to music while you study.
Good luck.
Hopefully she just doesn’t like to text and everything will be fine when you both move in together. I get annoyed when people don’t respond to texts too, it only takes a few seconds.
That’s assuming they are in a position to or even have access to their cellphones during the workday which isn’t always a valid assumption.
Several former workplaces I’ve worked in required all staff to check in all personal electronics so if someone attempted to call/text me, they’d likely need to wait at least 6 hours for a response as my cell phone is checked in with the security desk and I can’t access it unless I’m on a break or going home for the day.
There’s also the possibility even if there were no such restrictions, their work area may not have cell receptivity. Some basement offices may be located so far underground there’s no cellular access.
The OP may have asked the roommate an awkward question. The roommate may not want to share the names of the classes she’s taking – for example, if she’s on the waiting list for certain classes and doesn’t know whether she’ll get into them, or if she flunked a placement test and now has to take a low-level remedial class that embarrasses her.
I think that generally, roommates shouldn’t feel required to share academic information with each other. It’s really not the roommate’s business.