<p>I'm having problems with my roommate at school, but I don't know if it's cause to get a new room. Even though this girl and I share the same interests, we don't really mesh well, I mean it's only been three weeks and I can expect problems to arise, but it seems like things are getting worse and worse in regards to respect.
The day I moved in she got on me about having so much stuff because I had a ton of boxes with school supplies, food, books, etc. It's not a problem of space though, it's a problem that she's always pointing out the things I have. I have them because I worked hard for them, because they were gifts, because I don't waste my money, I save it up and get what I want. I feel bad though, because she always talks about her money problems and how she's having a hard time finding a job. But that's not the only thing that gets to me: she has all these posters and stuffed animals and (honestly) just strange junk on the walls and in the bathroom. I mean if we're sharing a room, I can understand hanging things up on YOUR side of the room, but not in my space as well. And, well this is where I think I'm getting petty, but I buy groceries instead of eating in the cafeteria, even though I have a meal plan, because I only eat organics. She told me, and i swear by all that i love, while we were in the grocery store that she didn't need anything because she lives off of the meal plan. But I've had to buy groceries twice this month already because she's eaten all my food, and never when I'm in the room, only when I'm gone. She will go to the store too, and buy junk food and not replace the things she's eaten. At the moment, I refuse to buy anything else, I don't care if I starve. But the real cincher happened just a day ago when my roommate left her bloody underwear in the sink. My friend came into the room with me and went to wash her hands and found that. My roommate wasn't there at the time, but I was so embarrassed. I mean, accidents happen to the best of us really, but as a young woman (she's 18, I'm 19, about to be 20 soon) that's a personal situation and it was so disrespectful to have to see that where I wash my face and brush my teeth. I hadn't talked to her about the other things, but I put my foot down on this and told her to move it. I don't live like that, I have to have things clean and in order because that's the kind of lifestyle I'm used to. My friends and family are both for me getting my own room but she depends on me because I have the fridge, the microwave, and the tv. If I leave she'll have nothing, really! So, my plan is to move out next quarter. Am I overreacting?</p>
<p>Do what's best for you. If you would rather be in a single, go for it---guilt free.</p>
<p>It's not being petty tobe annoyed that she is eating your food and usurping your wall space with her stuff. And the bloody panties...that's just gross. It's both of your sink and you should not have to contend with that!!!</p>
<p>So yeah she has issues but rather than decide you want to move out it may be less of a hassle. How about you buy a little wash basin for her at a dollar store and a little thing of pretreater. Give it to her with a smile and say something like "I thought you might be able to use this instead of the sink for any of your hand washables or things that you need to pretreat before wasing them, That way we can always have the sink free" Be chirpy and positive. When she thanks you you can say "You know I really would like to talk to you about respecting my space and my things." and then let her know that you would really like to try to start over and sort of re-draw the boundries. Your RA may have an example of a roommate contract that will be useful and she also may give you some idea as to how to start the conversation.</p>
<p>When I was in college I made the mistake of not respecting my roommate's boundries by borrowing clothes w/o permission a couple of times. She brought it up and I was mortified but it was way better than if she had just stuffed it inside and never said anything. I really respected her for saying soemthing and I also respected her stuff from that point on. Really I was being clueless, not malicious. The panty thing is nasty but maybe she's just a dingbat about things.</p>
<p>Oh and it is so not your responsibility to make sure she has a fridge and microwave so like the above poster says if you do decide to move out do it without guilt!</p>
<p>GRODY!</p>
<p>Thats what I get for reading random posts.</p>
<p>Ditch the witch.</p>
<p>In this occasion, the only thing I can tell you is to have tolerance and patience. Maybe your roommate needs a friend, someone that she can trust, or maybe she is feeling alone, and wants to call your attention, by being impatient and reprimanding with respect to your boxes. Try talking to her, and solving things out, she will eventually realize that you are good and stop being so boring.</p>
<p>I recommend that you give it a little more time; if things don't improve, then make the decision that will provide you with the best chance for happiness and success. After all, that is really what college is all about.</p>
<p>Speak up about it, you're going to eventually but try doing it now rather than later (when you're angry and fed up). </p>
<p>For example: while she's present, casually approach your fridge and notice that some food is missing. Tell her that if she wants some of your food, she should ask first or at least let you know she took some ("Hey did you take some of my ____? Could you let me know next time?"). If she's been consuming noticeable amounts of YOUR food, you know you have to get on her about paying you back (Let her know with a smile on your face, don't let your cards show, you don't want to be intimidating with her if money is a sensitive issue but you also want to get your point across).</p>
<p>I know this is common sense for someone on CC (you're not an idiot), but the hardest part is forming words that aren't incendiary especially in a bitter situation like this.</p>
<p>You absolutely cannot let someone think they can just walk all over you.</p>