Ok so I am living in an apartment and I am having some issues with one of my roommates and I want to know if I am over-reacting or if she is being selfish. So we each have our own rooms with doors and at night time (after midnight) one of my roommates will occasionally come to do something in the kitchen and leave all the lights on after she goes back into her room. I have early classes and am usually in bed by 12. I am a sensitive sleeper and when she turns the lights on it wakes me up because it shines into my room. I have tried a towel under my door but it doesn’t help. I don’t have an issue with her using the kitchen at night I just wish she would turn off the lights when she is done. I politely explained this to her and she got very defensive saying that I was the problem and I need to get over myself.
I want to know if you think she is right and I am overreacting about the situation. She has asked to keep the apartment at a colder temperature and nobody fought her on that even though one of my other roommates and I are always freezing. I do my dishes and try not to make a lot of noise when I wake up for my 8ams. I don’t get why she can’t just turn off the lights when she doesn’t need them.
You are right and she should turn off the lights, but it is not worth making it an issue. You have what, 4 weeks left? Ask her, put up stickies asking for them to be turned off.
My room is right next to the kitchen and light still gets in through the top and side cracks and at night it is fairly bright. But you’re right I am not going to mention it again since we are almost done with the year I just wanted to know so I can be a better roommate in the future.
I don’t think you’re overreacting. Telling someone to turn off the lights especially after they’re done with them is a common sense request. Whether you decide to make an issue out of it or not, is up to you. However, I think being a good roommate also comes with the ability to discern when to put your foot down and when to be accomodating. Don’t be afraid to put your interest first in a living situation, especially when the other party is being ridiculous. If you keep bending over backwards for people everytime, you’re just going to end up unhappy. Nobody but you, is going to be better at making your interests a priority.
First think about why is she not turning off the lights? is there a light switch near her room? would she have to walk through the dark to get back to her room? Could there be a small nightlight?
"I politely explained this to her and she got very defensive saying that I was the problem and I need to get over myself.
Was it politely? She seemed very defensive.
This is easy to solve for you…google “underdoor light blocker” and buy one or get a sleeping mask.
Not worth the fight with the little time remaining for the year. But be sure to chose a room away from the light next year.
You might be able to tape poster board strips around the inside of your door to keep the light out around the edges when it is closed. It would bother me and I can’t sleep with a mask on, so I understand.
Thanks all for your responses. Her room is right next to the light switch so it is not out of her way and that is one of the main things that frustrates me. But I am not living with her next year so it won’t be an issue for much longer. And I will try the poster board and sleep masks!