S having 2nd thoughts

Colleges and Universities A-Z University of South Carolina
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<p>Actually we have the opposite problem, as we had hoped for a better in-state deal with U. Wash. to keep D close to home. But UW offered no scholarships/grants - making even in-state a few thou more than USC. Plus UW placed daughter in general freshmen pool in the School of Arts and Sciences, not their business school. Since daughter already wants to major in international business, going in as a freshman to Moore at USC has just about sealed the deal with us to go USC. There is still the "other" USC (Marshall School of Bus), and her "reach" (UPenn) that we have not heard from - but it's doubtful that either of those would offer a better deal. We missed the Scholar's event but will be visiting Carolina in 2 weeks (pick a dorm, meet with Moore School) - we have yet to make any deposits. D was also accepted at Gonzaga (her original 1st pick) - with a $9K scholarship, which only put a small dent in the $35K pricetag. She is o.k. with USC (because of Moore) - hopefully the visit totally wins her over.</p>

<p>We made the decision ahead of time that we could sacrifice more financially if the quality of life / education was decidely better. Lucky for us we are dealing with USC regarding a major in international business - if it was, say, engineering, then the money saved at USC might not be for the best. </p>

<p>Now it's just getting use to the fact that our D will be nearly 3000 miles away. We still may be considering UW if they had placed D in their business school as a freshman - but that would still have been a more selfish motive on our part. D said she would take USC over Gonzaga, but would not go to UW over the Zags - so she was really the deciding factor.</p>

<p>Yep, being a parent involved/worried about the best for your child ain't easy - some on this board may have had an easy decision to make. Our decision came only after a bit more agonizing.</p>

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<p>I feel for you being so far away! </p>

<p>W&M is so close to home and is so highly ranked (I believe it's in the top 10 publics), I can't really argue against it. I was just so sure my son was going to USC, it's kind of hard to do a U-turn. He is on the internet now, comparing things on each school's website.</p>

<p>Well, at least he has until May 1 to decide!</p>

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<p>Namtrag...we had a torn child as well. Truthfully she agonized over the decision about USC vs Santa Clara. The finances of a private school are staggering...and she's 3000 miles from home. BUT she is happy with her decision now. When she decided not to attend USC, she wrote them a very nice letter, and included in it that she will always wonder "what if I had chosen USC". The admissions person sent her a nice reply...they actually held her admission open for a full year (expires May 1 this year) in case she changed her mind. They truthfully were wonderful to deal with. The nice thing about this college process is that most kids truly are happy where they attend...and if they don't, they can transfer.</p>

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<p>We were all gung ho for USC...even put a deposit in for Dorm, etc., Well, D just got accepted to both UDel and James Madison...which are way, way closer to home (USC was about 11-12 hours).</p>

<p>None of the schools offered any $, so it would have been out of my own pocket regardless. We will visit both UD and JMU in a few weeks, and sad to say, I think USC is now out of the questions. (if it was at least 1/2 way closer to home, then it would have still been in the running), but USC is by far the most expensive one too for us.</p>

<p>S made a mistake with his college choice two years ago and is paying the price. Only problem is, he is going to a very reputable school, but he has a love/hate relationship with it. I sometimes wake up at night in sweats knowing how much he is not enjoying it anymore (won't go into why, it's a long and heartbreaking story).</p>

<p>So.......I recognize how much making the right choice means. And, I now know that it is a good thing that S is close to home (well, one hour away), which now, in his case, is a good thing.</p>

<p>Our sad part with my S is that he turned down two VERY GOOD schools to go to the one he eventually went to...not that it's a bad school, just not as good as the other two, and I am kciking myself in the butt right now for his decision.</p>

<p>Anyway, back to my D.....as I've said on earlier posts, I wish I was the one going to school and I would have chosen USC in a heart beat.......but.......the decision is hers.......it is HER life....and the whole distance thing is an issue.</p>

<p>Good luck to everyone.................I wish all of you well, and success</p>

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<p>AFA007 - I'll be out your way looking at colleges with D2 next week. I am way stressed about the distance as well. My husband thinks she may decide to stay for summers as well....just what I wanted to hear. Oh, well, at least I will like visiting her!</p>

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<p>My angle was, we have just enough money saved for him to go to 4 years of school at today's prices, and that if he picked USC, he would have money left for grad school, or to help him buy his first house.</p>

<p>If he goes to W&M, he will have zip after 4 years.</p>

<p>I know what my dad would have made me do!</p>

<p>Again, in a sick way, it's nice to see we aren't the only ones who are going through this stuff!</p>

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<p>PA Mom,</p>

<p>Yep, this is still a big country. But I am lucky to have family and friends in SC - with a good excuse to visit and take advantage of some great hospitality. Still, even though we went through this with our S going off to Air Force Academy our nest will be empty when D leaves - which will make the cross-country distance even more of a challenge.</p>

<p>Still, D is making the final choice on USC based upon her major and getting into a decent business school. The pocketbook issues didn't weigh too heavily, just a little put off that UW seems to be a bit stingy on scholarship dollars.</p>

<p>Bring an umbrella and light jacket to Seattle - but you may still get a sunbreak or two for some great views.</p>

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<p>I'll chime in here. My daughter went to Scholars Day yesterday and got a bit spooked as well. What turned her off was the perception of the in-state student cliques. As a out-of-stater she worries that she will have difficulty fitting in. I am thinking/hoping that this is a fleeting and natural phenomenon since she already knows students at USC who had no difficulty coming from out of state and finding their niche as well as a great circle of friends. She just didn't feel the Southern Hospitality yesterday though. Perhaps those of you with out of state students at USC can comment. Are her fears valid? My D also has a strong in-state alternative to USC and is always wondering if she would be a fool to turn it down.</p>

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<p>My S also cooled to USC a while back. The "try harder" and glossy mail pulled him toward USC in the beginning of his search. But as began to dig deeper into the depth and quality of his major, and what USC offered, he began to have second thoughts. USC is strong in several areas (International Business for sure, and many others to avoid arguments) but he is science and engineering oriented. In the end, he backed away from the excellent packaging of USC and did his research to find the best fit (for him) in both campus experience and program quality. That said, I will point his younger sibs to consider USC so that they will have a similar choice to make. USC has many positive things going for it.</p>

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<p>Browse, </p>

<p>You are right on the mark there - too many other engineering schools that have a much stronger emphasis in science/engineering. My S is the engineer - got accepted to Georgia Tech and UCLA, but took the AF Academy - and laughed when I suggested USC as a safety. Might sound a bit condescending to USC engineer types, but the history of USC is as a "classical" college - even "Clempson" may be a better fit for those of a technical/engineer slant.</p>

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<p>I will respond to north and south if I may. When we went to Scholar's Day, we actually met up with another student from CC from out of state ( eadad's d). It was nice because the girls could have somebody to hang out with and not feel awkward. However, I did notice many kids kind of sitting alone and looking a little lost. I think it was just the format of the day, and not an indication of the general friendliness of the students body. Perhaps they should do some type of icebreaker activity to match the kids up a bit early in the day, because I will agree that it wasn't really a warm fuzzy kind of day. I thank goodness that we had met eadad and his d on-line beforehand because it did help a lot.
That being said - at orientation my daughter quickly made friends and at move-in everybody was very friendly and welcoming. She has friends from in-state as well as out of state. She actually has a lot of close friends that are from the area and include her in their activities ( ie, not cliquey).
My daughter is an extrovert by nature so she was not concerned with making friends. I know a lot of her friends from high school would sooner die than go OOS like she did and have to start from scratch ( alot of them went to the same college in-state and room together and hang out all of the time) . I think it is great for some , not so great for others, but I don't think that Scholar's Day will give an accurate feel at all. Hope that helps!</p>

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<p>well, it seems the USC ardor has cooled considerably!
S has had no difficultymaking local friends,OOS friends.His roomates next year are both from SC,and they didnt think he was too weird,being from NY.Perhaps if you have a kid who is more into the frat type scene, the insular nature of the cliques might come into play.
I guess I was tolerant of the distance factor as D had preceeded S and gone close to 2500 miles away,and S was not considering any school close to home (UConn maybe was the closest and it fell off the list right away).
Maybe we were a little more prepared as we realistically dont expect either kid to settle in this area, its just too expensive for young ones starting out..unless perhaps they are finance/business types.D will be an academic and will move wherever the faculty jobs open up,shes already relocated for Grad school.S will relocate wherever his first Sports Mgmt gig is,and will probably relocate after that. We also plan to leave this area,so why would I ask the kids to stay around here?
Nam..as far as the area near the Engineering School,it does seem different ,not like the Horseshoe,but the West Quad dorms butt right up against it on one side so its not as isolated as your S may think.
Oh well, I hope everyone can make the decision thats right for them.They do say that most kids wind up going to college closer to home so maybe all y'all misgivings about distance are valid.
Sorry we may not see more of you next August.
Nam..is there any repercussions over the fact that you made a deposit already?</p>

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<p>I'll respond to northandsouth too. My freshman D arrived last fall knowing no one on campus, except having had email conversations with her roommate (they matched up through UCHOOSE). We are from Maryland and she very quickly felt at home. She chose not to join a sorority, but soon formed a nice circle of friends, male and female. She has never mentioned that being from out-of-state makes her feel like an outsider.</p>

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<p>Cathy, it's y'all's! hahahaha.</p>

<p>I think we can get most of it back. </p>

<p>I think my S would do great at USC, and he is still considering it heavily. I have advised him to voice any questions he has to Ed Black and the faculty members of the departments he is interested in.</p>

<p>We shall see...</p>

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<p>Yes, from what my wife and son said, the brochure indicated it would be an opportunity to meet other scholars, but there was really no time to that. Of course, the time was very limited, and you can't do it all in a 4-5 hour period.</p>

<p>My wife said even having name tags with hometowns would have helped a lot, because the kids could have started some conversations from other kids from their state or city.</p>

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<p>Thank you all for the responses. I really appreciate the feedback and support. It has helped to put my mind at ease to hear that others had similar experiences but that the overall experience is still a positive one. My daughter has actually visited USC several times, has spent the night there with friends, attended events, met many students, and this is the first real negative. I think that her reaction yesterday was probably a natural one to a very stressful situation and the difficult decision she needs to make and is not indicative of USC. The same thing may well have happened at any school she was visiting at this point in the game. Ironically, in spite of a somewhat negative experience yesterday, my daughter proclaimed a couple of hours ago that she had made her decision and wants us to send the deposit to USC. I am 90% sure this is where she will end up but I'm not ready to send the deposit until all financial aid packages are in and evaluated. So our saga continues but thankfully an end is in sight!</p>

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<p>namtrag,</p>

<p>I will just chime in here with a couple of personal thoughts since we are a year away from being where you are. We are looking at state schools, too, and our S will probably apply to WM, just due to its great reputation. My brother went to WM about the same time as you (class of 85) and has a huge fondness for his alma mater. </p>

<p>However, I have been talking to many friends whose kids go there and several things I am hearing about the school give me room for pause. One is the intense academic pressure that seems to surround the students. A friend of mine told me that her son, who is at the Governor's school in Richmond (brightest of the bright), would not apply to WM because he has heard from Governor's school grads there that it is "pressure city just like TJ". Another young lady who lives near my parents (sharp as a tack-top 5 in her class) is a freshman there this year and is not happy. She is having to go to summer school to help pull up her gpa. </p>

<p>As an educator, I have always wanted my kids to go to the best schools they could, but in this case if the best comes with a price emotionally, I don't know if I wouldn't rethink some things. I am rambling I know, but you are kind of walking a path that we may follow soon.....I guess everyone has to follow their heart.</p>

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<p>My d was also very gungho on SC until she attended the McNair Scholars weekend. At that point she decided that she would not like to go there even though she is interested in International Business and SC has the best program. It was a big disappointment to her that she wasn't as impressed as she thought she would be but at least she has been able to eliminate a college from her list. The money and opportunties are great but not what she is wanting form her college experience.</p>

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<p>W&M sounds like it has changed a lot since I attended. I managed to party my way through somehow!lol</p>

<p>We have heard things like this, but had assumed they were urban legends. My son will have to decide whether he wants to go to a very challenging school like W&M. He is definitely not a partier, a big sports fan, or a real socializer, so he may not have a hard time adapting there.</p>

<p>People we know ask, to paraphrase, why would you not go to W&M? You were lucky enough to get in, you should go.</p>

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<p>Pineapple</p>

<p>It would be real hard for us to allow our son not to go to USC if he had been a McNair finalist. The $4,000 a year that we received would be hard enough to turn down, but $11,000 or $16,000 would be even harder to turn down!</p>