<p>^Interesting about reading. I do not like to read, neither do my kids, both are adults now. It did not hurt either of us in academics or carrer development or having very wide range of interests outside of academia. In addition, while I am very bad at spelling/writing, both of my kids are very good writers, especially D. who was newspaper editor, got writing award at HS and always had writing/English as her highest score on standardized tests (ACT=35 - English w/o prep for this section, while only 28 in Reading). She commented that English section needed just common sense. S. got into competitive college program of waiting list based on his essay.</p>
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I think every successful student will have taken a different path. I just think a love of reading was my kids’ path from a family with no history of college and a dad who has serious challenges. My girls are not great in math because I couldn’t help at all. Thankfully, they’ve all had excellent teachers along the way.</p>
<p>RE: Adoption–I’ve seen several friends’/relatives’ adopted kids grow up. Most of these families also have biological children. The parents were all college educated. Unfortunately, in all of the families (small sample, I know), the adopted kids did not do well, most had learning disabilities-- but the biological children were on the level of their parents. I’m guessing that the adopted kids’ biological parents were of below average intelligence-- and poor nutrition, drug abuse, lack of prenatal care, etc. may have caused more problems for these kids–who all appeared normal/healthy at birth and had the same environment, advantages as their siblings. I’d put genetics at 80-90%</p>
<p>Getting admitted to elite schools isn’t even on the radar of most students–especially in the South and Midwest (big part of the country between NY and CA), where most of the best students happily go off to State U. And then there are the kids who do not like academic work–they enjoy working with their hands and learn trades. Are they sitting around thinking, “Life is so unfair–if only my SAT scores were higher I could’ve gone to Harvard. . .” Not likely. Attending Harvard may seem like the definition of success for some, but that is not what most people want to do. They have no interest in playing that game. </p>
<p>If you send your kids to private schools, make over $200,000, have a PhD, pay for camps, lessons, tutors, sports, etc.–good for you! Even if I don’t/can’t, even if it gives you an advantage–good for you and your kids.</p>