SCEA-ers and friends applying to Stanford

Colleges & Universities A-Z Stanford University
1

<p>I was just curious if any other SCEA-ers felt the same way I did about friends applying to Stanford. (Yes, this is really mean.) This is mostly for the people whose schools don't send more than one applicant to a top school each year. First, I dislike how people assume that because you got in, they will get in too. It's not quite that simple. It's partially luck. Second, I dislike the idea of reliving the high school experience in college. If my friends are there, I feel that I'll be confined socially to the same role I fulfilled in high school and won't get to branch out and meet new people. Anyone else feel that way, or am I just a bad person?</p>

<p>Also, my best friend is applying: What do you think of her chances? It seems RD would be more competitive, yet, I haven't seen the strenght of applicants that I saw with SCEA, so maybe it's not.</p>

<p>SAT: 760 v 740 m
SATII: 800 IIC, 760writing, 690 U.S. History, 640 Lit and Spanish
Rank: 4/328, 4.0 UW</p>

<p>Activities: National History Day state documentary winner, sign language club founder and president, volunteers with Spanish speaking student, summer exchange in Costa Rica, yearbook business manager, science olympiad (regional awards), youth leadership program, food bank volunteer, debate club vp (minor awards), math competition placement, Nat. Merit, etc.</p>

<p>Essays: Interviewing Bill Moyers for NHD, volunteering with kid, studying Spanish, and taking sign language class</p>

<p>Anyway, we've talked about it, and both of us agree that we don't want to go to college together. How hard is RD anyway? Do you and your friends feel this way about college?</p>

2

<p>Hmm well i'd love to go to Stanford with my best friend. Also, RD's applicant pool is not as highly qualified as SCEA was, but to compensate for it the acceptance rate also goes down quite significantly. And as for your friend's chances, i think she's qualified to have a serious chance. Her academics are good enough and her ECs are above average. It depends a lot on essays, rec letters, and unfortunately, the luck factor (what stanford needs at the moment, how the adcom is feeling, etc.)</p>

3

<p>Because I got deferred, now I am competing with 2 others from my clas who have applied to Stanford. These two have similar EC's to me, higher SATs, and higher class ranks so of course I am worried. One already is in at Georgetown, the other got deferred from Harvard.</p>

4

<p>I think that Stanford will be such a different experience that even if your best friend went, or even a few people from your school, it'd still be completely different from high school :) There are so many classes and you probably won't end up in the same dorm. You probably wouldn't see each other much unless you made an effort.</p>

<p>Personally, I think it'd be great to have your best friend go to the same school. I really hope one of my friends gets into Stanford too. I think four of them applied. It'd still be a exciting new place and you could meet tons of new people, but it would still be nice to have someone you know well there to run to, lol, if you have any emotional breakdowns or anything. That happens sometimes for first year college students, I hear :)</p>

<p>I can however see how it would be exactly like high school if half your class went to the same school. I live in a college town and pretty much half the senior class always goes to the state university here. It's like a continuation of high school. A lot of times they hang out with the same people and even come back to visit us at the high school.</p>

5

<p>Wow, you guys are nicer than I am. And yes, deep down: The same is true for my high school and my state school. But anyway, I feel like going to college with my friends would be a bit socially repressive. My friend applying to Stanford is opposed to drinking, any sexual activity, etc., and though I'm not exactly sketchy by any standard, I think I wouldn't wat to deal with four years of her condemning other people. But on the other hand, I like her, I want her to be happy, but I don't think I'd be allowed to mature and grow because she'd still be making the same inside jokes from 8th grade.</p>

6

<p>Gosh, jellybean, that first post was brutal. But I'm sure you didn't mean it like that, else you would be going to Harvard/Yale/Princeton (the "better than thou" but not better than Stanford universities :p)
I kinda get what you mean about other people acting like they can definitely get in now too. Although I think deep down, everyone knows its just a crapshoot. So let your friends do all the talking, nod and smile, and be HAPPY for them if they get in.</p>

7

<p>No, no I didn't mean it that way at all. (And nice jab at HYP).</p>

<ol>
<li>Here, people rarely go to top schools. So my point is, everyone assumes that "Oh, she had straight A's and such and such SAT, of course she got in." People here don't get it. My one friend told my other friend who didn't get into Yale, "Oh, the only reason you didn't get in was because you didn't play sports." People don't understand. And so everyone here (minus Yale girl) talks like they can get in any school just because they have a certain GPA. I think THEY'RE the ones being snooty. I never thought I'd get into Stanford and talked about it in that sense.</li>
<li>I will be happy for her if she gets in and I think she's definitely qualified (and she has better activites than I did). Number 1 and 2 are entirely different discussion points. I really want her to get in, let's say Pomona, which she'd actually prefer. It's not like I'm wishing her ill not to get into a good school; She and I just don't want to spend four year socially confined to the same roles we've been playing in high school. Over the past 8 years, my friends and I have become different people. And I think we're starting to realize that we're different. Best friend and I probably wouldn't like each other if we randomly met because we've developed some deeper personal issues.</li>
</ol>

<p>You make me feel bad collegehopeful :(</p>

8

<p>God forbid, if you went to the same school, you'd be socially confined to your current "high school facade" without the chance to branch out for another 4 years... All because of that one person... among how many thousands?!?</p>

<p>Lame.</p>

9

<p>serious. doesn't sound like very good friends, i feel sorry for ya</p>

10

<p>I know what you mean jellybean. I'm not the shining star in my county (the competitive students at our high schools keep close touch with each other, especially now with college admissions) and I'm sure everyone was surprised that I got in. I was shocked too! They now automatically assume that if I got in, they can too, and that really bothers me. This doesn't mean I don't want them to, but I don't want them thinking that it's a cinch to get in, just because I did. I agree that luck plays a definite role.</p>

<p>I also understand not wanting to go to the same college as your high school friends. I also live in a college town (two universities (FSU, FAMU) and a community college) and there is also a large state university (UF) two hours away so almost everyone who goes to college, goes in state to those universities. Meaning that if I went there, it would be like high school all over again. I am so thankful to get into Stanford because this means I can start off on my own, no baggage, no past, in a sense.</p>

<p>However, if one or two of my high school friends went to Stanford, I don't think it would be a huge deal. There are 6,000 undergrad students and if I didn't want to hang out with them, I wouldn't have to. It's just a matter of distancing yourself.</p>

11

<p>Umm... I kind of agree with jellybean on some level. Maybe we're both going through similar situations.</p>

<p>My school is quite small, and I think I'm the first student (non-athletic) to be accepted into a selective/prestigious school like Stanford. When people heard about my acceptance, they said, "Of course, you're smart." They assumed that because I was valedictorian and took several AP classes, it was only inevitable that I would be accepted. But I think a lot the kids in my school are more motivated to apply now (and there's nothing wrong with that, although I do think there is a misconception at my school that valedictorian, high SAT scores, good grades = acceptance). People don't really understand that the essay and teacher recs can really make or break an application, since such a high proportion of the applicants are already well-qualified in terms of stats when they apply to Stanford.</p>

<p>And I don't think it's "lame" in any way to be concerned about a friend going to the same college as you. College is a time to try new things and break-away from high-school life. Some couples break up before heading off to college-- why? They know it's a new phase and a time to meet other people, explore other areas, and realize new ideas! It doesn't mean that anyone is being a bad friend.</p>

<p>I don't think Stanford will be much a problem though. It's such a big school. Chances are, you'll have different classes and reside in different dorms. Plus, when you get to college, you'll probably BOTH start drifting since college is so much more of an independent experience and it happens naturally anyway.</p>

12

<p>It's easier to forge friendships with people in college if you knew them from high school. I wanted a lot of people from my school to get in, but most of them got rejected/deferred. Kinda bummed out.</p>

13

<p>Eh... I wouldn't call admissions at Stanford "random". It may appear random when only viewing a few aspects of the application that are easily quantifiable, such as SAT scores, GPA, and rank in class, but the procedure is much more holistic than that. Essays, recs, and extracurriculars are equally important in deciding admissions, and the Stanford adcoms are notorious for taking to the more "quirky" essays. Geographic location can come into account as well (I know my class represents 49 states: North Dakota is conspicuously absent). Being from a state that is geographically under-represented can be a slight boost as well.</p>

<p>Regarding pre-formed friendships coming into college, it really is less important than you think. The vast majority of students (~90%) come in knowing absolutely no one, so everyone is in pretty much the same situation. Anyone that you do know will probably live in a separate dorm.</p>

14

<p>how can you not want to go to college with your best friend?</p>

15

<p>jellybean--I know exactly what you mean as far as the friend thing goes. I've known a lot of my friends, including my traditional best friend (not so much anymore, but absolutely definitely completely when we were younger, so we've still got that connection), for the past eight years. a lot of the time, it's like we're friends because we have those inside jokes from eighth grade and not because we would be friends if we met today. I'd really rather not go to college with a lot of them (including my traditional best friend)--I mean, I love them, and I want them to be happy, but it would be constraining, because some of them honestly haven't grown up as much as I have in some ways, and they'd be a constant pressure to stay the same. and to those who say that it's a big school and you can just grow apart and fade away...well, it's easier and less painful on both sides to do that if you're not in the same place. if you're best friends only because of your past and not because of your present, then going to different colleges is ideal. you keep the friendship up at whatever level is appropriate, but there's no pressure to be as close as you were, because...you aren't.</p>

<p>some of that may not have come across right, but jellybean, I hope that makes you feel a bit less evil. plus, you and your friend agree on this, which is one more indication that it would be for the best.</p>

16

<p>entropicgirl - I know what you mean. It's kind of like... yeah you'll drift away, but there's more pressure to stay close since you're going to the same college after all. There's less of that expectation if you two went to totally separate colleges.</p>

17

<p>Yeah, actually that makes sense. I've lived in three different states in the last seven years and I realize that I've only kept in touch with the friends I really have a connection with after I moved. My best friends here I've only known at the most for two years so obviously we haven't drifted apart and I guess that's a reason why I definitely would love for at least one of them to go to the same college.</p>

18

<p>u guys make me realize that i'm lucky to have friends i get along w/ so well.</p>

19

<p>seriously...that's why so many 1500+s can get rejected--they're weird and anti-social...colleges don't want that</p>

20

<p>I don't see how colleges can tell that an applicant is antisocial. Of course, if they write their essay on the topic of how they hate everybody or if their only activity is playing D&D, I could see that, but most applicants would be smart enough not to do that I was really worried that I was portraying myself as antisocial, but either it didn't matter or they saw through it.</p>