School personalities and "fit"

Prep School Admissions
1

<p>Hi all,</p>

<p>I'm new to this forum, and I have a question I'm not seeing addressed (at least not directly) elsewhere.</p>

<p>Our daughter is looking into the possibility of going to boarding school. I see a lot of discussion in these threads about how important it is to find a school with the right "fit" for the student, and we couldn't agree more. Unfortunately, though, neither my wife nor I went to boarding school ourselves, so we don't really know much about the various schools. </p>

<p>If it's not too much trouble, could people who are familiar with various schools please elaborate on the "personalities" of the schools? Please relate whatever information you consider to be important for a prospective student to know. We're especially looking for the kinds of things you won't find in the Peterson's guide or on BSR. Be as general or as specific as you would like.</p>

<p>Thanks in advance. :-)</p>

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<p>Or you could tell us about your D, and we could tell her where to go... (in a nice way, of course ;) )</p>

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<p>Hi skidad!<br>
I was you a year ago. I think a LOT of us were. So many people told me about "Fit" and that you would know when you found the right school. How I asked? I was told, you'll just know. In many ways that is true.<br>
But here are things we considered before coming up with our "short" list of schools to consider (short is "quoted" because it was over 20 when I stopped, and then we did 12 visits). </p>

<p>Geography. More a practicle matter than anything else, but we wanted to limit our son to about a 2'ish hour drive from home. Of course being in New England, that only slighly narrowed down the search.</p>

<p>Will she consider single gender? I HIGHLY recommend she at least visit one. It may not be right, but she and you might be pleasantly surprised. My son didn't rule it out and would be voted least likely to go to an all-boys school by classmates and probably teachers too, but that's where he's going. </p>

<p>EC's/Sports - what does she do? My daughter is starting to be a diver, that considerably narrows the field. Not all schools have swim teams or ski teams. My son skis, but that wasn't a deal breaker, lacrosse would have been. </p>

<p>Saturday Classes - some schools have them, some don't. Those that do, generally have longer breaks at the holidays and spring than those that don't. I think all the schools have sports on Saturdays, so there are commitments on many Saturdays either way.</p>

<p>Dress Code - Formal, casual, none? To be honest, girls have it easier at many places, in my opinion. Even at the "formal" schools, many of them we couldn't really tell what the dress code was for girls, but for boys it was jacket and tie. (I'm sure girls will argue the point, it's just a parental observation). </p>

<p>We'll all give you some suggestions, you can see the literally hundreds os choices at Peterson's and BSR. Check the web sites, you'll get a feel, get the view books of the web sites that feel good to you all but then, honestly, from there, it is so how you feel when you walk on campus.<br>
An admissions rep at one of the schools we visited told us there are 3 general kinds of visits - #1 - When can I start? You feel like you belong there. #2 - you can see yourself attending and happy. #3 - you can't get out of there fast enough.<br>
We had all 3 of them. But to be honest, the one that was #3 for us I didn't have a great feeling from the web site and the view book or from a casual visit to see a lacrosse game the year before. We shouldn't have even gone. </p>

<p>I'm sorry to be so long winded, when it really comes down to this: when you walk on to campus you will know if you fit. The trick is narrowing down the field so that you don't have to visit 100 schools to find the few that give you that "this is home" feeling.</p>

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<p>Thanks, Grejuni. </p>

<p>She's very self-motivated academically, always has been, and has always earned excellent grades. She's also involved in ECs such as chess club and drama. She loves to draw, and to write, and is a compassionate and honest person. She's not super-athletic, but has enjoyed playing many sports over the years. </p>

<p>Generally, we think she would fit best at a school that is not elitist or "cutthroat", but is someplace where she feels comfortable enough to take chances and branch out.</p>

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<p>
[quote]
but is someplace where she feels comfortable enough to take chances and branch out.

[/quote]

I hope you/she will consider an all girls. That's one of the compelling reasons. There is a whole thread on the girls schools, it's probably a few pages back, but it's pretty long.
Emma Willard
Mill Halls
Miss Porters
Ethel Walker
Stoneleigh Burnham</p>

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<p>Hi Linda,</p>

<p>Thanks for your replies. You make many good points. </p>

<p>Single-gender is not ruled out. In fact, my wife really likes the idea, for the same reason you state. Thanks for the list.</p>

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<p>We also used the same approach as Linda. Our biggest setback is that we were swayed for a little bit y all the talk of "tier 1" schools. We ended up visiting several and soon realized why most of them were not on our original list. My son also did not want a cut throat enviroment or Saturday classes. He also wasn't thrilled about wearing a suit. (Not an issue for girls)</p>

<p>I would also suggest that she take the ssat to get an idea of where her score would fall. I was used to my son scoring in the 99% on everything so his test scores were a bit of a reality check. </p>

<p>Send for as many guide books as you can and look at them. That'll give you a start. </p>

<p>We were all in the same position last year so ask away. I think Linda and I visited about every school in the Northeast (between us).</p>

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<p>Is there a geography that interests you the most because it is within 2 hours of home or close to a relative?</p>

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<p>Thanks for the tip about "Tier 1" talk, WB.</p>

<p>BP, re: geography, we're a bit out of luck there. We're in the west, and there aren't any boarding schools (with > 1/2 boarders) anywhere near us. So we're pretty much looking at California (still not close to us) and the northeast. We do have relatives in the northeast, though, and we go there regularly, so our D is not unfamiliar with the area.</p>

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<p>Here is the link warriorboy started last year about fit
<a href="http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/prep-school-admissions/402678-good-fit.html%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/prep-school-admissions/402678-good-fit.html&lt;/a>
After you get a list going of places you are interested, trying searching on this forum for ideas about specific schools. This is one about the school my D is going to next fall - St Andrews:
<a href="http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/prep-school-admissions/475019-st-andrew-s-de.html?highlight=andrews%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/prep-school-admissions/475019-st-andrew-s-de.html?highlight=andrews&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p>

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<p>You may also want to check out The Madeira School, an all girls school in DC. I recently sat through one of their presentations and this school seems phenomenal! Their exposure to Capital Hill, for example, allows many students to do junior year interships (not page positions) with congressmen/women. My son felt this was an ideal school for him as well, but for all the wrong reasons.</p>

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<p>skidad, sent you a PM.</p>

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<p>I'll tell you a little about Blair Academy which is the only school I know well. If it looks interesting to you, feel free to ask me questions here or via pm.</p>

<p>Of interest to you is that Blair is somewhat close to 3 airports with Newark the closest Blair</a> Academy - Campus & Contact Information . It is a warm campus environment with almost all the faculty living on campus. There is a high percent boarding, so your daughter will have company during the weekends. If she is interested in venturing into New York City or Philadelphia, there are some weekend trips there. </p>

<p>The academics are challenging but not cutthroat. She will be encouraged to challenge herself academically as well as in the arts and sports. While they don't offer a chess club now, they have in the past. Perhaps she could start one. Anyway, on Sunday mornings, there is often a faculty chess player in the dining room waiting for pick-up games with students. Chess is also one of the competitions during the Headmasters Society Competitions Blair</a> Academy - News & Events
There is a beautiful and relatively new indoor theater, but my favorite is the outdoor theater which overlooks Blair Lake. In the spring, productions are held there with torches for lighting. Very dramatic!</p>

<p>There are many opportunities for community service. Blair has a lovely campus that is registered with National Register of Historic Places. </p>

<p>Happy hunting!</p>

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<p>I have friends whose daughters went to The Madeira School, really liked the experience, and said if making the decision again they'd probably pick it again. Most importantly the girls liked it too. The younger is now in college studying to be an engineer and the older recently graduated from college and is a corporate engineer.</p>

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<p>Many fine posts from others here. Depending on where you live, transportation may be an issue. So, some schools in New England are about an hour or less from Boston and Manchester airports, and others are further. Also, are there direct flights from your home to the airport near the school, or will a change of planes be required? </p>

<p>Sometimes a small issue can help narrow your choice. We were looking in NE to be close to family, and my niece wanted to be on a swim team during the year. Up to now, she has only had summer swimming experience. Well, that one factor enabled us narrow the list of more than 100 girls/co-ed schools in NE (that was daunting!!) down to about 20. Is there one thing that your daughter must have? That might narrow it down for you.</p>

<p>Also, will you be applying for financial aid? If so, you might want to consider schools with larger endowments that have a higher portion of students on financial aid, and where the average aid per student is higher.</p>

<p>Many of the schools will put you in touch with parents and/or students, and you can ask questions directly. There are also many parents and current students here, and we are all happy to help with providing information.</p>

<p>Taking the SSAT as early as possible is another great tip. While only one part of the picture, it will let you know if her scores are in the range for what a school is seeking.</p>

<p>Starting this spring for admittance for Fall 2009 will put you in good shape.</p>

<p>Good luck with your family's search. Many of us were in your shoes just a year ago. With smart planning, you are likely to have a successful outcome.</p>

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<p>You've been getting some good advice. Essentially, you need to find some way to narrow down the potential schools without limiting yourself and possibly missing a potentially great match. As others have pointed out, you really need to utilize different categories to help you sort through the schools. For example: (i) single sex or coed; (ii) large or small; (iii) rural or more urban; (iv) dress code or no dress code; (v) Saturday classes or no Saturday classes; (vi) mostly boarders or large day student population; (vii) mandatory chapel/strong religious affiliation or no religious affiliation; (viii) do you have a specific sports requirement; (ix) an obscure language your daughter wants to take; (x) is a term abroad program important to you, etc.</p>

<p>Of course, sometimes even these basic questions can be difficult to answer. You might decide that in some ways a single sex school would be great for your daughter, but in other ways you and she would prefer to be at a coed school. That you like the more nurturing environment of a small school, but the course selection, facilities and large number of EC's offered by a larger school.</p>

<p>Once you have begun to narrow down your choices, you can begin to try to get a feel for the "personality" of each school. A visit is the best way to do this, but this board is also a great resource. Current students of various schools often post here. Parents of current students post. Alumni post. You will definitely get an idea of how the schools see themselves.</p>

<p>The process can seem daunting, but it is also fun. Also, don't stress out too much. It's rare that there's only one school that's the perfect fit for your kid and much about this process is out of your control - once you apply it then becomes the school's turn to decide if they think your kid is a good fit for them.:)</p>

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<p>Thanks for the tips, everyone! This forum is so helpful; I'm so glad I found it. And there have been a number of good suggestions, both on this board and via PM, for specific schools to look at. Thank you all for those as well.</p>

<p>Re: financial aid, yes, we'll be applying for that, so a large endowment is a good thing for us to look for.</p>

<p>And you're right, prpdd, that even the basic questions are difficult to answer. We're looking for something with > 250 students or so, with no less than 70-75% boarders. Other than that, none of these other criteria (rural/urban, single-sex/coed, dress code, Saturday classes, etc.) are deal-breakers.</p>

<p>What I'm trying to get a feel for is the "personality" of the schools. This forum is great for that, with all the student/parent/alumni posts, but I'm finding that I have to do searches for specific schools to find the "personality" info. </p>

<p>So that's why I started this thread: I was hoping that it would generate a list of schools and their "personalities", and then we (and others) could use it as a guide for which schools to delve deeper into.</p>

<p>If people are willing, how about this?: pick one or more schools, and for each school, if you were limited to five words or short phrases describing the school, what would they be?</p>

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<p>Definitely check out Miss Hall's. That's where I'm going this fall, and I love it. It has a very homey feeling and I just seemed to click with all of it. Great school that empowers girls and helps them grow and "branch out". I'm so excited to go it's going to be great!!!</p>

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<p>We were in your shoes also last year and, frankly, I can hardly believe I am giving out advice for NEXT year's applicants! The ink is barely dry on the contract!</p>

<p>I remember half laughing and half worrying at Linda S's long list of schools and school visits. I thought she was crazy looking at so many, but worried that we were foolish to only consider a handful.</p>

<p>In the end, initially from reading this board, but ultimately after our visits, we wound up sold on single-gender schools. The pros could be argued from either a girls' or boys' perspective.</p>

<p>BUT, again, it is the FIT that is most important. When we asked my son if he would be willing to go to an all-boys school, he shrugged and said, "Sure". His open attitude made single-gender schools a surprisingly refreshing option and narrowed the list down to a few in a heartbeat. Single-gender is the best fit for MY son, but maybe not for your D or others.</p>

<p>I agree with others about taking the SSAT early. If your daughter doesn't score in the superstar range and has no obvious hooks, take a good long look at second-tier and third tier schools.</p>

<p>Consider:
Urban, suburban, or rural
under 300, 500 or large
coed vs. single-gender
athletic, artsy or a combination
religious or not
campus feel and style (visit required most likely)
geographic-proximity to your relatives might be a big consideration
more geopgraphic-proximity to airport and how school facilitates this is VERY important for you.</p>

<p>Good luck and keep asking!</p>

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<p>You make me laugh, baseballmom! I had totally forgotten Linda's list and her schedule of visits. I think I advised taking many pictures of each school because however else could you keep it all straight!</p>