I’m a little concerned about your future. It seems your parents have micromanaged your life to the point where you don’t have the experience of making decisions for yourself. I think it would be appropriate to take a step back and evaluate whether the path you are on is your path or the path your parents have pushed you into without even accepting that you might think or feel differently. Allow yourself to decide how you feel.
Secondly, I’m concerned about the heroic effort it apparently took for you to get these grades and this acceptance. It doesn’t seem physically or emotionally possible to work any harder than you have been in high school. What will happen if the difficulty of this program turns out to be significantly greater? I say this from the perspective of seeing my daughter, who is a freshman in a challenging STEM program, working a lot harder than she did in her high school AP classes. Even so, she still sleeps at night.
Glad you are doing better. Keep talking with your parents; it helps to set their expectations. Remember that they want what’s best for you (in their eyes). I hope you figure out what you want.
@mathyone I completely agree with the sentiments in your first paragraph, as I mentioned earlier I really don’t have a good sense of my life’s purpose yet or what my career will be:
“I do not know what I want to do, but I sure as hell know how to do what everyone else expects me to do. This is a big problem, in my opinion, for a lot of CCers who have been overachievers their whole life.”
However, I do know where my strengths and weaknesses lie–I understand math/physics concepts easily, I struggle with writing long papers etc.
As a student in the IB program, I am forced to take rigorous courses in the humanities and sciences. This, I think, greatly contributed to my stress–I hated having to read for history and write long papers in english. I also took 3 sciences (AP Chem, AP Bio, AP Comp Sci) and 2 maths (AP Calc BC, Diff Equs) as well as AP Lit and IB Contemp History and all of my other electives were AP level. I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone at my school, or seen anyone on these forums that has had a schedule more rigorous than mine.
I honestly don’t think that Hopkins will be impossibly hard for me, especially since I don’t have to take very many humanities classes (I think 1 or 2 to fulfill some requirement?) and I am only going to take 4 classes a semester, not 9 like I did this year. Also, I am looking forward to the fact that I won’t have to do “homework” per say, I have to simply understand all of the concepts in my courses. In high school, I do well on tests but I hate completing petty worksheets and writing papers.
And a lot of my stress is avoidable, I am a chronic procrastinator and I am horribly inefficient at doing things I do not like. I’m excited to finally be taking classes I like.
9 courses in IB is insane. No wonder you’re burnt out. Even in non-IB, 9 is too many classes.
There is certainly “homework” in university. There are papers, even in the sciences, as well as problem sets, labs to be written up etc etc. There’s also plenty of reading.
In life, there will always be tasks that you don’t like. Even though you may get to pick all or most of your classes, there will still turn out to be some that you don’t like.
I think that you have to look at what matters. The only possible thing that I can see being at stake are AP classes whose credit would allow you to lighten your load in college.
Otherwise B’s are probably optimal in this situation. C’s are too close to D’s and will cause you extra stress. You should be happy with B’s. This is a great time in your life to get a different kind of education - learn how to be happy. Find another boyfriend, enjoy some carefree time, learn to drive, spend time with your friends, spend some time outdoors etc. Getting B’s can be therapeutic because you will see that the sun will still rise tomorrow. There is more to life than just achievement. You need to learn how to be happy. No guilt necessary! Stop it. Achievement can be an addiction as dangerous as any other. Start weaning yourself away from the destructive aspects of it so that you can retain the positive aspects of it. There are positive aspects of it :-).
Since you know that your parents won’t let up, just say as little as possible and be pleasant.
Apologize, don’t react to their insults, but don’t change a thing. You don’t need their approval.
You’re going to have to succeed in college without them on you anyway. Start breaking away in a gentle but firm manner.
B’s aren’t bad for a senior admitted ED. Don’t feel bad, there’s nothing to feel bad about. In fact, you could drop one of these 9 classes and you’d still be fine. Don’t pull all nighters please those are very bad for your health. Enjoy your senior year. As for your parents, let them know B’s don’t matter to selective universities, they know what senioritis is. They do care about D’s and F’s (might care about 9 C’s, too). But B’s? It’s par for the course.
Congratulations on your acceptance! Take care of your health and try to mentally relax a little. Making yourself sick won’t help anything. You really deserve to have some privacy. I’m sure it’s stressful having someone looking over your shoulder all the time, so I’d consider making new social media accounts when you get to college (without letting your parents know). Sign on to your old one now and then but only post short, positive comments there. You may also want to consider getting one of those inexpensive month to month phones so your parents can’t track your location while you’re at school. (I have one for my high schooler that costs me $27/mo.) I hope there comes a time when you can tell your parents that they can’t monitor your social media or track your movements, but if they’re going to hold funding your college education over your head I don’t think I’d have that conversation until you’re self-supporting.
Enjoy your senior year. As for your parents, let them know B’s don’t matter to selective universities, they know what senioritis is. They do care about D’s and F’s (might care about 9 C’s, too). But B’s? It’s par for the course.