“I think ultimately, it is often not good to be able to get As in classes you don’t like because it deadens your senses to why you should study something, i.e., you enjoy learning that area, not to get good grades.”
I don’t think this is the right message, not liking something doesn’t mean you can blow off the class and get whatever grade that you happen to get. And as @bodangles points out, any job will have some things you don’t like, and you have to learn managing through that.
@websensation my point is that if your kid got 1-2 B’s every semesters, UCB and UCLA wouldnt have been matches and Stanford wouldve been beyond reach. And the two honors college couldve been matches and not safeties.
And thats why kids freak on their grades.
I saw one thread of a high school freshman saying she was spending too much time on “unimportant” things like spending time with friends and family. I was confused how no one was pointing out that that is completely absurd. Having a heathy social life to me is just as important as getting an A.
@SculptorDad You have a good point about different assumptions. I assumed that the OP was talking about several Bs in high school career, but if the student gets several Bs per semester, the student has to obviously adjust her expectation. But my point is: lowering your college expectation is still no reason to “freak out”. You can still accomplish great things in life in another way, and going to HYPSM in no way is a ticket to a successful life. The earlier you develop self confidence that is not tied to getting all As, the better off you will be. THAT was my point. In this sense, I was happy that my kid did not get perfect grades in high school and found out that he was not good in certain subjects because he is definitely bound to get Bs and even Cs in college, and I certainly don’t want that to affect his self confidence. I already told my kid that there will be some really smart kids at Stanford so don’t let it unnerve him but he has some other qualities that other kids don’t have.
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Second that. There are so many options. A close look will uncover great fits.
Going to a Honors instead of UCB, or going to UCB instead of Stanford would be fine. But being unable to go to your ABET accredited state university and unable to pay for a need-conscious and don’t-meet-need private collage because of a even lower grade seems a good reason to freak out to me.
Most kids don’t have illusion of going to Ivy, but grade still matters a lot to them. There are a lot less opportunities for current students with low grade than our generation had. Whatever worked for us, or working for top performing students of their generation won’t work for the majority of them.
And that’s why they freak over grades.