Hi,
I am currently a college freshman at a school 12 hours away from home. I was okay during the beginning of the first semester and then started considering transferring to a different school at the end of the semester. Now, as I begin my second semester here I find myself extremely homesick and wanting to go home- an option I don’t really have. I also think the academics at the school I am at are not hard enough for me and that I could be going to a more challenging university. I made the deans list the first semester and although I gave all my work 100%, I feel as if I am not in the right place. I tried to email clubs to get more involved, as I don’t have a good group of friends yet, and all of the clubs either never responded or never have meetings. I am looking at schools that are about 4-6 hours away from my home, but are more expensive and am not sure if I am making the right decision or not. I do like the area I am in currently and have enjoyed my classes.
Any advice?
Thank you.
Try to get to know the other students in your major. You will have some things in common and you can see if you find a way to fit in a bit better on campus. There is still time to apply for transfer so you don’t have to make a decision just yet and you need to give it another chance.
As for the difficulty of the courses, I am pretty sure you can figure out how to challenge yourself a bit more. Take a heavier load, start taking advanced courses in your major, volunteer in a research group, etc. First semester general education courses are always easier than what you get in your discipline further on.
Perhaps you could allow yourself to consider transferring while also working hard this semester to increase your social options while at your present school. if you are accepted to another school, you don’t have to accept the offer. It might be that you feel very differently by the time you are accepted into another school. But going through the application process may also help you feel better knowing you’ll have an out if you need one. Feeling better might encourage you to do more socially.
Sometimes coming right off a break from school results in a temporary surge in homesickness. The newness of heading off to college has worn off, you now know what you are up for the second semester, and your disappointments with your social life so far is hard to face. You just spent the holidays at home in a cozy familiar place where you were away from all of the pressures that go with college.
The posters above me give excellent advice. Continue to try hard in your current environment to improve your feeling of academic challenge and your social life, while fully exploring your transfer options and even applying to transfer. If you feel that your current situation has improved enough to satisfy you then you can turn down the transfer opportunity if you get one.
@NorthernMom61 is spot on about the blip in homesickness coming out of the winter break. Most people are prepared for a bit of homesickness when they first go off to college, but are surprised that it can hit again at the end of first semester (Thanksgiving…) and after the long winter break, when the newness has worn off- and it’s January.
In terms of reaching out, student organizations tend to be no more organized than the students who run it- I would suggest that you actually go to the things you are interested in rather than sending off emails.
Also @xraymancs point about first semester classes is worth noting- many students find that either second semester of freshman year or first semester of sophomore year they suddenly hit much harder work, and as you get into your major you should find more opportunity to stretch yourself.
Finally, focusing on physical distance is a good way to psych yourself out- and it’s not really meaningful. Twelve hours is North Carolina to Kentucky if you are driving, or New York to Berlin if you are flying. Four hours can be Washington, DC to Richmond, VA on a Friday afternoon or it can be a flight from New York to Texas. Like jet lag, it’s best to not think about it at all!