Two years ago, I rescued a puppy from a park near my house. She had severe wounds on her head and was on the verge of dying. Her family had abandoned her where in her mother had tried to bite her head and separate her from the rest of the pack probably because she was weak. I brought the puppy home and cared for her endlessly trips to the vet lasting around 15 days. We tried to reunite her with her family but she would yell hysterically at the sight of her mother. So, we decided to adopt her.
My question is whether this story about rescuing her would be a good topic for the common app essay. I have learned a lot from her and can include these lessons in my essay. Should I go with it?
it sounds great to me.
- Remember to "show don't tell" -- above you told me the story. Showing the story would involve making you as your main character and running that main character through what happened. "I got a new bike for my birthday. It made this ticking sound." = telling. "My new bike made a satisfying tick-tick-ticking as I whirred down the hill away from my birhtday party." = showing.
- Sensations, smells, touches, tastes -- all five of the senses don't forget.
Thank you for the advice!
I think it’s a good idea. @dustyfeathers gives good advice.
Sure, it sounds like an engaging story! Maybe include some details such thinking through what to do when you found the puppy, what your thought process was. I’m sure you learned a lot about yourself during this, about persistence, problem solving, responsibility. Probably some thoughts about “family” too!
Sure, I will do so. Thanks!
I love it! Honestly, I find it refreshing and age appropriate compared to so many of the essay ideas I read here. You are a teenager which is still very young and to me this sounds like a teen’s honest voice rather than someone trying to convince me they’ve saved the world, overcome their assigned gender, or created a start-up.
This is authentic. Good luck!
When I read the title of this thread, my first thought was to simply reply - “No!”
Your essay is about you, not about a puppy.
I love all of the comments above.
I think you have the start of an engaging, compelling, and memorable story. From my username, you can tell I am a dog lover, and I have a special place in my heart for those who help animals. You’re a kid who has made a difference, and you have been rewarded for the experience. Thank you for sharing. (I would love to read your essay when you have finished it!)
Best of luck!
Interesting topic which should reveal a lot about you. One concern I have is why did you try to reunite a traumatized puppy with its rejecting, physically abusive mother ? Probably retraumatized the puppy.
Very touching. Be aware the colleges tend to look at how one helps others in need or join them in actions, as they look to build the college class. If this connects with compassion for people and efforts to help them, good. But we don’t know your college targets. The holistics tend to want some hints how you interact with people, take those chances. “Show, not just tell” would mean those other activities in your record. Not just how you write this story or use descriptive phrases.
Hi everyone! I am done with my essay and would really appreciate some help reading the final draft. If you’re willing to give me some valuable suggestions, please PM me. Thank you. 