So I’m planning to head to boarding school next fall (at least, for now). I still need to submit the Rooming Preferences form, and I’m deciding whether I should go for a single or double dorm room. Up until a few days ago, I had always had my heart set on a single, but everyone seems to want to go for a double - so I’m rethinking my choices.
SINGLE - you get your own private little space, where you can pretty much do whatever you want. You get to have “me-time” and there are fewer distractions to prevent you from doing homework. You can wake up and sleep peacefully. You can decorate the entire room however you like. However, I’m kind of worried that if most other people choose a double, and I choose a single, I would have a harder time making friends and I would have a worse social life.
DOUBLE - you would be less lonely in your dorm and it would be easier for you to make friends. I’m a very sociable person, so that’s great. You would feel more connected to other students… However, there is some risk involved. Your roommate might be your best friend, but they can also be your mortal enemy. You may hate living with them. Also, you wouldn’t have your own private space, and so you couldn’t do whatever you want. Your roommate might give you a hard time when it comes to getting sleep.
Anyone who has experience with a dorm - be it in college or boarding school - please give me your opinions and tell me what you think!
I went back to your old threads to see what school you were going to – and I can say either way you will be fine! Hotchkiss has a very active/vibrant dorm community, and there are “dorm feeds” where everyone gets together after study hall in the common room for food and hanging out a couple of times a week. Plus you’ll have a proctor who will be looking out for you. Plus, if you are a boy, it is very likely you will be in either a small dorm, or on a floor with not that many people – so it is easy to make friends. (Could be the same for girls, but I only have sons).
So basically I think it is a wash – either decision is a good one 
My son started out in Tinker, a fairly large dorm. They converted it to a girls dorm the following year and my daughter lived there too! In my kids’ experience, dorm life was very social, either in a double or a single. To a degree though it is what you make of it. My son and his roommate had a large room across from the common area so socializing was hard to avoid even when you didn’t want to.
@highschoolperson - I think you answered your own question. Your gut has been to choose single up until lately when you are hearing what others are doing. My experience is that my gut is usually right. In fact, as a general rule, in tests and in life, unless I am positive my new answer is correct, and that I have caught an error in my old thinking, then I tend to stick with my first instinct, if it has stood the test of some time. While we do want to be flexible in life and consider that with new information, time, and contemplation, we may change our minds, I tend to favor my gut if I’m “debating which way to go in my head.” Your post sounds less like “new information” and more like “second guessing,” but I might be wrong.
Another way to think about it: I believe in the “he** yes” model of life. Answer is either “he** yes” or it’s a no. Which housing picture gives you more a “he** yes” response?
Another way to think about it is the introvert/extrovert spectrum – you WILL get plenty of people-time in BS. Will you crave some alone/quiet time? Are you someone who is energized by or exhausted by a big party, for instance? Do people give you energy or take your energy? Leaving a crowd, do you feel inspired and ready to take on the world, or do you want to curl up and read a book and be alone to recover a bit?
http://talk.qa.collegeconfidential.com/prep-school-cafe/2137583-dorms-how-to-choose.html
This is my post from last year. I ended up requesting and getting single, which was great. You still get to socialize all the time too—just knock on their doors or go to the common room. I found singles particularly helpful when you just want to take a quiet nap or in need of alone time; and like you mentioned, you have the risk of not getting alone too well with your roommate if you do have a double.
I personally must say; I asked for a double and sincerely regretted it. The social scene at BS is overwhelming, especially as someone who’s rather introverted. You will want that space to cool down and relax. For days where you feel more social, definitely a lot of people spend time in other people’s rooms, there’s your dorm’s common room, and there are spaces dedicated for socializing on campus. I do not kid you when I tell you socialisation will find you. But for days where you want to have private conversations, for days you want to cry, for days you want to be alone…
I cannot express to you the absolute nightmare that is realizing that there is nowhere you’ll be truly alone.
On another note, the absolute nightmare of having a terrible roommate, which is something I don’t particularly want to delve into. All I’ll say is that there are good roommates, but it’s never guaranteed. You can always room with someone in your dorm after you get to know them - you’re what? Hotchkiss? - for lower mid year.