<p>I am not homophobic; I am just curious in case it ever happened. What do you do if you get a roommate that is homosexual? I know that sounded bad-- the obvious answer is "What's wrong with having a gay roommate?" Well, nothing. I was just wondering.</p>
<p>It seems like it can be really awkward, especially if they are attracted to you.</p>
<p>The odds are against a gay roommate being attracted to you–think about how many roommates end up hating each other anyway. Most likely is that you end up firmly in the “friend zone.” And if he is attracted to you, well, by college he probably has a lot of experience getting over crushes on straight guys. Nobody I’ve spoken to who has had a gay roommate has had any problems–this includes my dad back in the eighties.</p>
<p>The gay roommate would probably be just as worried–if not more worried–about a potential homophobic straight roommate.</p>
<p>Bonus for straight guy rooming with gay guy–gay guys tend to have lots of straight female friends to introduce you to ;D</p>
<p>As a gay freshman college student, I can tell you that you probably shouldnt worry. Its nerve wracking to think that my roommate may not like me because of my sexual orientation, and in no way would I make that situation worse by showing any kind of attraction towards my roommate.
I’m really scared about dealing with coming out to my roommate, just because you never know how someone might react (or, if I dont say anything, I dont want them to be mad at me for not being upfront with them). Trust me, if you have a gay roommate, they are probably more worried about you hating them for being gay than you are about them having a crush on you. I dont think there are many people who go into college thinking its a good idea to hit on your roommate…male or female.</p>
<p>There’s actually a topic in the Parent’s Forum right now similar to this, but more from the parental perspective of their child getting a gay roommate.</p>
<p>As the gay roommate who keeps living with straight girls, I can only give you the other half of the story. I’m sure every once in a while, roommates do have some unrequited love, but it’s DEFINITELY never happened to me. I’ve just gotten homophobes who I wouldn’t be attracted to even if they were kind. Generally, living in close quarters is going to kill the attraction rather than foster it, as someone posted in the 'Rents Forum. </p>
<p>
Quoted for truth. I’ve written numerous times about what I’ve dealt with with my roommates, and this is exactly how I feel walking into every semester.</p>
<p>I probably wouldn’t know; I mean, you can’t tell if a person is gay or not just by looking at them…unless they WANT you to know (living up to stereotypes, etc).
And I wouldn’t care. Sexual orientation means nothing to me…I judge people based on things they can control; personality, attitude, etc…</p>
<p>I3aur…here’s a small story.</p>
<p>I went to the Boy’s state thing during my junior summer year; got assigned with two random guy’s I never met. Anyways, hanged out with them all the time, and they were the coolest dudes I ever met. Then on the 4th day, we were just chilling in our room talking, and one of them said, “Oh, my boyfriend just texted me.” Now, I’ll admit it, I was kinda uncomfortable around gays before that, but after I learned one of the coolest guys I met was gay, my opinion totally changed and honestly its all just chill with me now. I know it sounds really awkward being put up with stuff thats unfamiliar to you, but isn’t that what this “college experience” everyone’s talking about? As long as you go in happy, you’re probably gonna leave happy.</p>
<p>My roommate had no issue with my sexuality. (She’s straight, I’m bi).
I wasn’t great friends with her, but we just had different personalities. It had nothing to do with my sexuality.</p>
<p>None of my LGBT friends had any issues with their roommates, and none of their roommates had any issue with them. </p>
<p>Actually, no that’s wrong. I have one lesbian friend at school who switched rooms really quickly. Her roommate immediately hung up a crucifix when she got to school so my friend figured that she should tell her about her sexuality (to avoid any problems later on). The roommate flipped out and refused to go into the room until my friend had moved out. That was fine with my friend, she just moved to the other side of the hall- no feelings hurt. </p>
<p>Guys tend to have a bigger issue with it than girls, but I’ve never heard of any real issues except for the extreme case I talked about above.</p>
<p>EDIT:
As to the attraction thing- it’s whatever. My best friend is bi (guy) and he had a crush on one of his roommates. Nothing ever came of it, because his roommate is straight, and they are still great friends and rooming together again this year. He told his roommate about it too, and his roommate was cool with it.</p>
<p>^I feel like women can be a lot meaner about it, as I’ve experienced it first hand. You hear a lot about how guys can be violent, but woman can be just as bad, and the gossip is terrible, and more harmful in the long run.</p>
<p>EDIT:
Of course I’m not saying that what gay men go through is any easier than what gay women go through, just that the discrimination is the same in both cases.</p>
<p>^ I totally understand what you mean SnappleSpice. All of my gay, male friends who live on campus are mostly fine with their roommates. If they have conflicts over sexuality, then the straight roommate generally just makes one comment or is outright about how he feels. [Strangely enough.] At least in dorm situations, it seems like men tend to be a lot less passive aggressive despite everything we hear about men being less tolerant of gays and all that jazz.</p>
<p>Meanwhile, having lived with female roommates, they’re hell to deal with when you’re gay. Even one of my STRAIGHT friends, who is gay-friendly and works at our campus LGBTQA center, had a roommate who would break her stuff and tape up notes with words like “f*g” on her side of the room. I’ve definitely gone through the same as well, including with religious roommates.</p>
<p>^ Exactly. I’ve never gone through something like that in a dorm situation, but the whole “being upfront about it” is exactly what I’m talking about. At least most guys usually make it so you know where you stand with them, the hints and gossip that some girls make over the issue is annoying and most of the time, hurtful.</p>
<p>Ugh, I’m not looking forward to this at all. The thing is, I’m bi. But while I’m not closeted about it (if you ask, I’ll tell you) I’m not really in your face about it, either. I don’t really talk about it, not because I’m ashamed, but I don’t see a point, really. It’s no one else’s business who I sleep with. There are certain things that hint about a person’s sexuality and for me they hint that I am attracted to both sexes. I’m afraid my roommate won’t be okay with this, and I also don’t really want to come out and tell her…she doesn’t own that information and for me it is sort of a private thing. I probably will wind up telling her but I hope it doesn’t lead to any negativity. :/</p>
<p>Think about all the women out there that you know and then think of how many you are very attracted to. Probably less than 10% in them. You like girls, but yet you don’t become attracted to most girls you see. Same goes with your roommate. Just because he likes other men doesn’t mean he will be attracted to every guy he sees. Most of the guys will be…well…just other people that he knows (without any sexual stuff thrown in there)</p>