<p>OP, I don’t have a son like yours, but I think I understand what you are talking about. We failed some of the brightest kids and we cannot blame parents alone. Some of the brightest kids need help, just like kids at the other end, early on, not until college professors rescue them.</p>
<p>Keep in mind; I’m no parent- I’m a student who might fit this criteria and just received a rejection from a high-target school. I fully understand schoolwork, love to learn, write essays, and have intelligent discussion and am quite passionate about history/ the social sciences…but my general disorganization limited my success the first half of high school, causing me to have to switch schools. However; I’ve had quite an upward trend; with good test scores as well and I’m hoping my colleges will realize that. (small LAC’s mostly)</p>
<p>So far, I have been accepted at American University and Skidmore College; my safeties …and have received a rejection from Macalester College; one of my high-targets/low reaches.</p>
<p>my stats: </p>
<p>AA male, competitive private school in NJ
3.41 GPA, 3.62 senior year GPA
SAT: 690 CR/ 600 M/ 710 W
SAT II : 650 French w/ Listening, 730 US History 
I am a good writer and my essays are possibly the strongest aspects of my application.</p>
<p>I have a good set of extracurriculars; from 4 years of fencing (2 years Varsity, 2 years Club); 2 years as Technology Editor of my school paper; participation in the Shakespeare Festival at the Shakespeare Theatre of New Jersey; serving as a Peer Mentor to underclassmen, and also many outside of class; namely having started a fund for an orphanage that I visited on a trip with my grandparents to Zimbabwe. I also was a participant in a pre-collegiate summer program in American History at The College of William and Mary- taking a 4-credit history course…as well as having held numerous jobs during past summers. </p>
<p>I was expecting mostly rejections; and my first one came today… from a school where GPA is one of the most important deciding factors. However; I was also recently accepted at a very good LAC that saw my upward trend and how different of a student I have become since my time as an underclassman . … and although I’m not the Fiske Guide; here is some advice which has helped me so far: The interview helps. For me, it allowed me to express how I’ve grown as a student and how upward my trend truly has been. For one college; the alumnus who interviewed me told me a similar story about himself and his growth over time and reassured me that the admissions committee of the school (a small; top 50 suburban west-coast LAC; one of my true targets) will take this into account and they really look for who the student is in the present and how they can bring something personal to the community, and he felt that I (and students like myself) fit criteria that the school values in their students. I haven’t heard from that school yet, but they intend to mail decisions next week.</p>
<p>Remaining Schools:</p>
<p>Reaches:
Brown
Haverford
Vassar
Wesleyan
William and Mary</p>
<p>Targets:
Oberlin
Occidental</p>
<p>I hope this has helped- I’m just someone who understands that not everyone who doesn’t have a 3.8 is dumb…</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>This bears repeating. Repeatedly.</p>
<p>In response to my post? Or in general?</p>
<p>Either way I agree wholeheartedly :)</p>
<p>Oh, no, skeeterx8. Just in general. Such good points she has made. Very true.</p>
<p>I’m just worried right now; that’s all…</p>
<p>I feel that numbers-wise I only have a chance at two schools. I’m happy that I’m in one that I like; but scared that I won’t get into my targets…</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>But there’s about a 99% chance that said fantasy professor will require suddenly enthusiastic student to do the (heaven forbid) dull, mundane, boring work such as note-taking of his own (oh, say, regarding research, insights, theories, formulas, what have you). And said professor, if he has done the slightest bit of brain research himself, knows full well that one way the brain imprints information and retains it better for recall is via physical recording of data such as (wait!) note-taking. </p>
<p>Look, I learned long ago, between getting my first and second set of credentials, that traditional site schools were built for girls, not boys. It was obvious to me once when I led several classes on an Outdoor Education adventure, segregated them by sex, and the boys way outperformed the girls in academic areas. I’m all for restructuring education to configure to guys’ needs, from little ones to big ones. But in the meantime, whatever happens to education, The Real World awaits, and most intellectually stimulating jobs demand a great deal of note-taking, reports, sitting (sometimes for long periods), and unexciting tasks. It doesn’t cut it to tell your boss you’re “not into that kind of thing.” </p>
<p>The vast majority of boys who feel “above” the mundane assignments of school end up having to perform the mundane in 4-year colleges or 2-year colleges, and/or in their jobs/professions. It’s just that the ones who have resisted it for 4, 6, 8+ years may learn it later while supposedly “lower IQ” people pass them by on the job or in college. </p>
<p>Part of intelligence, btw, is figuring out what you need to do to get where you want to go.</p>
<p>OP, I’ll form part of the hand holding ring. We also went through the same brutal 23 hours of Caltech/MIT rejections last weekend… After going through the deferrals from both for EA back in Dec.</p>
<p>My son is not an academic slacker as he did all his notes and every stupid coloring projects that came along even as a junior in HS. Not much good in English and writing (math/science kid), got his B’s there but did every last bit of work. Did his best on his essays but they were not great. Took most rigorous courses etc. 750+ on SATs. However, he was an EC slacker. Didn’t really see any point in joining clubs or such (not a big socialite), didn’t see any point in taking national math tests (not academically competitive). Quirky kid also with a stubborn streak. We’re in a middle of nowhere state and never realized how that stuff could impact his apps. Didn’t know SAT II’s existed until end of Jr. year. No mentors in school. His physics teacher (his passion) thought it was a waste of money to go anywhere other than our mediocre at best state school.</p>
<p>He did get passionate about a niche sport and basically taught himself (no coach available in the entire state) and reached a nationally competitive level. </p>
<p>Visited Caltech last spring, loved it, came home and decided to study for SATs. Also loved MIT when he visited. Recruited by the varsity coach at MIT, told to apply early, asked for commitment by the coach, deferred, rejected. Also recruited at Caltech, but we know that and $1.29 will get you a cup of coffee. Deferred, rejected.</p>
<p>Well, he’s in at U of Rochester, Case Western and RPI with good merit money. We’re still waiting to hear from some reach/matches including Harvey Mudd (how did you get results already?). I know he’s disappointed although I think he’s moving on.</p>
<p>And yes, he plays video games.</p>
<p>
A not uncommon experience, I suspect. My D was by no means a slacker in any sense but had a similar experience. The schools where she was accepted were good fits and the one she attended turned out to be a spectacular fit. Nearly two years after graduation, TheMom and I were having one of those “Isn’t it great that she wound up at X” talks again just the other night.</p>
<p>D had applied to Yale EA and was pretty quiet when she got that rejection, her first, not even a deferral. This was a student who set a fast enough pace that she wasn’t used to being rejected, or even coming in below top 10 percent, on even the tougher “playing fields” such as in AP classes. After a year at X, she said that Yale could now come calling and she’d tell them, “No, thank you.”</p>
<p>I want to highlight post 80. It is possible to transfer from a Tier 4 school to a Tier 1 school.
The trick is to buckle down in college and do what it takes to achieve the GPA that is commensurate with the talent.
I sympathize with esobay’s son unwillingness to do mindless busywork, but a lot of research is tedious repetition; experiments don’t work right away, chasing after bugs in your code is mind-numbing, the evidence you thought you would find in some dusty archive is elusive. And you need to take meticulous notes whether you are doing a scientific experiment or doing historical research, or analyzing economic data. The hope, however, is that the purpose of all this work is sufficiently exciting (and I’m not talking about careers) that one is willing to endure the tedium.
For those who love math, think how exciting the ten years Andrew Wiles spent cooped up in his attic trying to prove Fermat’s Last Theorem must have been. Mostly NOT.</p>
<p>Skeete – I just want to point out that you have already been admitted to two terrific colleges. I think that its great that you have confidence to apply to those reaches as well – but they are reaches. Please don’t lose sight of that when the results come in over the next two weeks. You have already done very well with college admissions, whether or not you get admitted to any other colleges. </p>
<p>I really find it depressing that so many students seem to think that they have to gain admission to a relative handful of highly competitive, prestigious schools. There are so many excellent colleges to choose from – I honestly don’t know why kids and parents seem to think that the elite schools have some sort of monopoly on educational offerings.</p>
<p>My daughter has been accepted to both of these schools</p>
<p>University of Connecticut gave her a 1/2 tuition merit scholarship and we live in the state
and placed her in the honors program </p>
<p>We were just notified she was accepted at Rensselaer with no financial help</p>
<p>We are leaning towards U Conn</p>
<p>She does want to go to graduate school</p>
<p>Her major will be computer science</p>
<p>Any opinions out there?</p>
<p>Thanks in advance!</p>
<p>Pitcher - might want to post this in another forum - one of the top CS school forums (MIT, caltech, carnegie-mellon). Those parents know specifically the entire range of offerings top to bottom of CS programs. My S is also a CS major and UConn wasn’t on his list - maybe he missed it, but RPI was. He ended up @ UPenn (great school, not necessarily great for CS but figured he would have a better overall college experience than @ Carnegie-Mellon) what you need to look at are how far the classes go - if your D has already knocked out the AP’s and maybe a few college courses during past summers, she might find that she would run out of courses pretty quickly at a school where their CS dept isn’t big. But do post in one of the tech school threads - you’ll get lots of thoughts about this.</p>
<p>"is dream schools were Harvey Mudd, MIT (since 3 years ago when DD toured), and Caltech. And we really thought he might thrive there if he got off to a good start. (all NO) </p>
<p>We thought his match schools were the mid UC’s but today he was rejected from UCI (after rejects from UCLA, UCSD before)."</p>
<p>As the mom of 2 sons who were smart slackers in high school, I don’t know what you’re complaining about. </p>
<p>Your son’s high scores and intelligence didn’t make up for his laziness. No surprise that he got rejections from even match schools. The best prediction of college performance is gpa, not scores. Top schools have an overabundance of applications from very intelligent students whose gpas and scores reflect their intelligence and strong work ethic.</p>
<p>Maybe due to your S’s disappointment, he’ll be inspired to work to his potential in college.</p>
<p>To me, it’s wistful thinking assuming that if a slacker got into a top school, he’d have worked to his potential. He may have simply continued assuming that golden doors would open for him even if he performed far below his potential.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>I don’t think OP is complaining. She’s simply looking for someone to commiserate with.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Can’t a mom have even one thread where she gets to grieve, without everyone jumping all over her? The OP didn’t say the schools unfairly rejected her son. She just said she’s disappointed: disappointed her son didn’t do better in school, disappointed some schools he wanted to go to rejected him, disappointed her dreams and his dreams aren’t coming true right now.</p>
<p>Of course she’s disappointed. It seems like everyone else is getting good news, and she is getting more and more bad news. I hold your hand, OP. May your son thrive and grow where he ends up.</p>
<p>^^ I think that makes 3 of us holding hands :)</p>
<p>I’m happy for the OPs son…he has an acceptance!! I’m celebrating that part too.</p>
<p>I think the OP or someone else mentioned the issue here…it’s the title of the thread. Perhaps “Dealing with the Disappointment of Multiple Admission Rejections” might have been a better one. There are, I’m sure, others who are just now beginning to get letters from deadline schools that are NOT admission offers. It IS hard to deal with those.</p>
<p>@calmom
Thank you very much! I’m very happy with the acceptances; and I particularly loved Skidmore. During my search; I made sure my favorite schools were mostly my targets… now I’m waiting on my two remaining targets and lowest reach- all my favorite schools. That’s what I’m worried for…however, I feel a bit better because of how my interviewers for both of my remaining target schools said that admissions will see that I’ve come a long way…luckily; I’m glad I applied to small LAC’s where GPA is one of the many factors that they look at in the process.</p>
<p>northstarmom needs to chill. seriously.</p>