so... i think i might hate it here.

Student Lounge College Life
1

<p>alright, well i'm honestly devastated to even be posting this thread. i've been beyond excited and enthusiastic about attending college for such a long time, and this was really the last thing i wanted to be doing.</p>

<p>i'm a freshman this year at holy cross, in worcester, massachusetts.
it was one of my top choice schools because of its beautiful campus, strong academics, and small student body.</p>

<p>don't get me wrong. the campus is breathtaking, and the academics here definitely rigorous. (we're ranked in the top fifteen on the princeton review list of students that study the most)</p>

<p>the campus is small and friendly, and most people wave hello and hold doors for each other as well.</p>

<p>but i hate it.</p>

<p>i don't know if it was that i didn't know myself and wasn't aware of what i really wanted... but this was not how i imagined college.</p>

<p>i'm a political science major and i've been interested in politics for as long as i can remember. while the department is particularly strong here at holy cross, the student body is horribly apathetic. </p>

<p>about twenty people attended the college democrats meeting this week, and if you're trying to discuss politics with people that are non-majors, they really don't seem to care at all.</p>

<p>i saw my college experience as a time where i could be excited about making a difference in the world. helping those in need. fighting social injustice, and things of that idealistic, collegiate, youthful nature. </p>

<p>that subculture at holy cross is very hard to find. </p>

<p>i also was somehow under the impression that since the school was in worcester there would be something to do. wrong again. you can't walk into town at all, in fact, there's really nowhere that you can walk to.</p>

<p>on the weekends there are shuttles that take you to and from boston and providence, which is nice, but during the week you're pretty much left to eat at one of two dining halls on campus or get coffee from the lone coffee place.</p>

<p>the social scene is abysmal. high school was more exciting and i grew up in the middle of nowhere.</p>

<p>half the kids on campus get outrageously drunk every weekend and throw up all over the residence halls after dumping the garbage cans all over the floors and getting trash everywhere. i feel like my family is paying $49,000 for me to live in a dumpster two days a week.</p>

<p>the other half doesn't drink at all and is opposed to it completely.</p>

<p>i've pretty much spent all of my evenings sitting with a small group of people in a dorm room watching TV.</p>

<p>i don't know what to do.
i know this probably seems like a ranting and complaining thread, which i guess it is.</p>

<p>but i feel like i can't actually express these feelings to my friends and family for fear of disappointment, so i don't really know what else to do.</p>

2

<p>My S -- who has lots in common with you in terms of activities and people he enjoys -- is at a soph at a LAC that has a well deserved reputation for partying. His freshman year, he ended up in the dorm that was the partying dorm (and drunken students vandalized the dorm, causing all of the students there to be assessed $60 fines each for the year), and his roommate was a big time partier whose main interests were getting drunk and getting laid -- including bringing girls into the room to have sex while S was trying to sleep.</p>

<p>S also is very interested in politics and was disappointed that the political clubs on campus weren't that active. </p>

<p>However, S got good advice from graduated senior whom S had met when the senior had interviewed S for merit aid that S got. The senior said come spring semester, lots of the major partiers would have flunked out, and even more would flunk out by the end of freshman year. Consequently, the college experience would get better and better for S who increasingly would be around students with similar values.</p>

<p>S also made some excellent friends by joining various organizations that happened to be magnets for the more serious (but still fun-loving students). This included S's starting participating in activities that he'd never done before. He has been very active in campus community service organizations, which tend also to be a wonderful place to meet students who are serious about academics and also are caring, friendly, and compassionate. His other clubs ranged from arts-oriented ones to martial arts to dancing clubs. </p>

<p>This year, he's rooming with like-minded friends, and they host parties with other friends.</p>

<p>While S's campus is right off a major community thoroughfare that has lots of eateries and shops, S and his friends mainly do things on campus because the surrounding community is very expensive and S's budget is limited.</p>

<p>My advice is to broaden your interests by getting involved in some more organizations. Also do what you can to revitalize the College Democrats. It's an election year, no better time to get people active in it. Do on-campus voter registration and similar activities. The local Democrats should be happy to help you.</p>

<p>Even though you are "just" a freshman, you can take a leadership role in activities by offering your ideas and skills. One way that S met so many active students who shared his interests was that S would do things like make fliers for clubs that he joined. </p>

<p>Don't write off the students who don't like to drink at all. Just because some students don't drink doesn't mean that they don't believe in having fun. Some may have far better social skills than do students who hide their lack of social skills by getting smashed and hanging out with others who are so smashed that it doesn't matter that no one can have a coherent conversation.</p>

<p>Keep an open mind. It's still early in the year, and as a result, you've got only a narrow perspective on what the college offers.</p>

3

<p>"i've pretty much spent all of my evenings sitting with a small group of people in a dorm room watching TV."
lol I have to do that too! The most fun I've had so far is finding new people to do the same routine stuff with... haha... why am I laughing?</p>

4

<p>Those of you who are just watching TV in the evenings: What kind of activities did you do when you were in h.s.?</p>

<p>Lots of students erroneously think that the only reason to do h.s. ECs is to impress colleges, but truth is that the things that you do in your free time in h.s. prepare you to be active, fulfilled adults including when you are in college.</p>

<p>If you didn't participate in ECs in h.s. or if you forced yourself to do ECs that you didn't like, college is virtually your last chance to learn about being in activities that make you happy. This includes learning how to join clubs and become a contributing member of them. Being a contributing member is the easiest way to make like-minded friends (assuming you choose to join clubs that interest you).</p>

<p>If you don't get involved in activities while in college, you're not likely to do it in grad school (where opportunities are much more limited) or after you enter the working world. Instead, you may end up being the type of person who has no life except for work. Once you leave undergrad, you're likely to live on your own, so wouldn't even be watching TV at night with dorm friends. </p>

<p>I notice that Holy Cross has 80 different clubs including some with a community connection. Seems those would offer many interesting ways of using your free time and making new friends. </p>

<p>If you're just hanging around your dorm room with friends, you could make things more interesting by playing some games. That also may make your room a magnet for some more people.</p>

5

<p>In hs I was in the art club, mainly because I knew I wanted to major in art. I...think that was it. I've joined clubs here, but still that's only one night a week per club. The main advantage it seems is to meet new people... new people to do the same stuff everyday with XD. </p>

<p>We have videogames, we play once in a while but not everynight because it takes a lot of time before we're all content with the victor (we're very competitive), and we play poker about once a week but that has already gotten very dull. So after all that there's still not much to do besides tv.</p>

6

<p>You can help your clubs think of more activities. For instance, I notice that your campus has: an arts and crafts fair scheduled: Saturday, December 6.</p>

<p>Your art club could help members have things to sell at the fair. It also could invite some of the outside participants to do presentations for the fair. Perhaps your club even could sponsor a booth in which club members demonstrated or taught crafts. </p>

<p>Probably student activities could help you with this.</p>

<p>Be creative. Don't just accept what exists. Use your talents and creativity to expand what exists. What your campus has to offer you depends a lot on your own assertiveness.</p>

<p>I also see that your campus offers a free leadership development series, which could be a great way of learning useful skills and meeting people. S participated in something similar on his campus, and it was a good way to meet interesting students and connect with faculty and advisors who were looking for students to get involved in interesting activities.</p>

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<p>Hmm I guess I should try that leadership series if it will have such wide benefits. I'm not sure about the art fair, it sounds great but it will have to depend on how many people are interested and willing to participate, and so far this campus has Apathetic written all over it. I have not met many enthusiastic art majors here, let alone non-art majors who would be enthusiastic about learning crafts at a fair. But I'll see what I can work with here ;) thanks.</p>

8

<p>You don't need a lot of people to be interested in the art fair or any particular event or idea. Most things are accomplished by small groups of people. This is true even in large adult professional organizations that put on large events.</p>

<p>Usually there are only a few people who do the majority of the work. THe rest of the people will show up when it's clear the event will be a success.</p>

<p>The up side of all of this is that if you're in the small organizing group, you'll make lots of friends, and will develop excellent skills and contacts that can help you with your future endeavors. </p>

<p>At the art fair, for instance, you and one or two people could have a booth that teaches people how to design effective flyers for their organizations. You could have examples of good and bad fliers, and have paper and markers available for people to sketch their ideas for you to critique. Wonderful way to provide a service and to meet lots of people.</p>

9

<p>It would be cool and fine to have few people organizing the fair but I mean I'm worried about how many people would care enough to attend such a thing. This school is so apathetic... I swear a large majority of people stay in their apartments all day, leaving only to eat or go to class. I don't know, we'll see I guess.</p>

10

<p>The college is sponsoring the fair. It sounds like a big event for the campus and community, and a wonderful opportunity for any arts-related student organization. Since it's on campus, presumably lots of students will attend. Usually lots of people go to things like that to buy holiday presents. The arts club even could have things to sell for a fundraiser.</p>

<p>"Saturday, December 6, 2008
10am–3pm
Main Complex Concourse
Free
The University of Wisconsin-Parkside presents the 35th Annual Arts and Crafts Fair December 6, 2008. This fair features shuttle service, live music, a raffle, concessions available, coat and package check, and great shopping!</p>

<p>Exit Hwy E off I-94, 5 miles east to Hwy JR, Kenosha, Wisconsin
Need a map? Welcome</a> to University of Wisconsin-Parkside! Keyword: Campus Map"
Activities</a> | Arts & Crafts Fair</p>

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<p>i write for the college newspaper, am active in oxfam america and college democrats and i'm applying for a position in SGA.</p>

<p>i'm afraid to do anything else for fear of not having enough time for my studies.
these groups are definitely ways that i saw myself meeting people with similar views, but their attendance is weak and they're mostly made up of juniors and seniors...</p>

<p>granted, SGA hasn't really come into full swing yet. that should be becoming more active this coming week...</p>

12

<p>Probably more freshmen will join the groups as the year proceeds and the freshmen become less shy about joining organizations. You also can help do an outreach to freshmen. When I advised a college newspaper, we started regular training sessions offered by members of the newspaper to help students learn the skills of writing, editing and design, and we made a special outreach to freshmen including by asking profs teaching Freshmen English to encourage students to attend the sessions.</p>

<p>We advertised the sessions via flyers, and made it clear that even students who hadn't worked on newspapers before were welcome. And we also made sure they knew there would be free pizza! Free food is a student attractant.</p>

<p>What I noticed was that those who started at the campus newspaper as freshmen tended to rise to become leaders of the organization, make good friends across classifications, and also made their best friends at the newspaper. Some marriages even resulted. :) The same probably is true of students who get involved in other labor-intensive activities.</p>

<p>Don't just wait to be told what to do in the organizations you're participating in. Bring up ideas, and be willing to organize them. With the newspaper, look for stories to do. Don't just wait to be assigned them. For instance, you could be writing a story now with tips from upperclassmembers, the dean of students, counselors at the counseling center about how freshmen can make friends. </p>

<p>You also can make announcements about upcoming meetings of organizations. Do this in your classes. Usually professors are happy to allow students to make announcements particularly if the subject relates to their classes. By your standing out in this way, you'll also meet more like-minded students.</p>

<p>S last year was one of the few freshmen in some of the organizations that he participated in. His friends included freshmen as well as recent grad who served as an informal advisor to one organization. By spring semester, S was one of 2 freshmen who served on a campus wide committee. This year, he's co-chair of an organization and is still on the campus-wide committee for another.</p>

<p>College isn't like high school: Your closest friends can be fresh, sophs, juniors or seniors, not just people in your classification. You can organize activities even if you're "just" a freshman. College is more like the outside world where adults can have friends that span generations, and if one has expertise, one is able to organize things even if one isn't as old as are some of the other participants.</p>

13

<p>"Saturday, December 6, 2008
10am–3pm
Main Complex Concourse
Free
The University of Wisconsin-Parkside presents the 35th Annual Arts and Crafts Fair December 6, 2008. This fair features shuttle service, live music, a raffle, concessions available, coat and package check, and great shopping!"</p>

<p>Wow maybe you're right, sounds bigger than just an art fair...</p>

14

<p>
[quote]
about twenty people attended the college democrats meeting

[/quote]
</p>

<p>That's pretty sad on HC's part. I go to Temple, which is one of the most Liberal schools in the country, and we have more than 20 people at our weekly College Republicans meetings.</p>

15

<p>Am I the only one who thought that 20 people for a College Democrats is pretty good.</p>

<p>Anyhow, the College Democrats scare the crap out of me. Same with the College Republicans. The people in these organizations are extremists imo. And I haven't seen them out yet, but I imagine College Libertarians are the worst!</p>

16

<p>Maybe at your school, but no one in our CRs is extreme at all. And again, 20 people in CDs is absolutely horrendous, unless you go to like SMU or TCU or something...</p>

17

<p>Small student body is probably a big part of your problem. I mean you have less than 3000 people... you're not going to get a lot of students for many meetings, especially because you aren't in a big political science area (school in a city, state capital, DC) where the most involved students try to go.</p>

<p>Anyway. Maybe you can get the Dems to be more active. Does no one show up because you don't do anything fun? What are meetings like? Are there other polisci organizations you could join? (Like a nonpartisan get out the vote one?)</p>

18

<p>Well I'm at a huge university and we have about the same turnout for the College Dems too... So, it's not just your university.</p>

19

<p>i think that the small student body might be a part of my problem.
i mean.. people are genuinely nice, there just isn't much cultural diversity here, which i suppose i should have known coming into the situation.</p>

<p>as far as college dems goes, the first meeting was informational.
last night a democratic congressman came to campus and about 35 people came to hear him speak (some were from college republicans, others were just interested, etc) and it was actually a very pleasant evening.</p>

<p>there are quite a few things planned for the election including canvassing in new hampshire, doing phone banks, etc... so i'm hoping that maybe more activities will draw people in. i'd be surprised at such a low turnout for an election year..</p>

<p>i also feel like the fact that i can't go into a city might be bothering me a bit. i grew up in an extremely isolated area, so when i was applying to college i didn't really want the culture shock of being in a completely urban area, so i figured that worcester would suffice since it's a city but isn't huge.</p>

<p>the problem is that you really can't go off campus. there isn't like... a college town that you can walk into and grab a bite to eat or a cup of coffee, etc. you're really isolated on campus during the week.</p>

<p>i mean there's a good chance that i'll get over it and just get used to being here and only having something to do on campus...</p>

<p>it's just very unfortunate that you can't have a car until you're a junior at a school where you can't walk to anything. eating at the same two dining halls day after day just gets kind of stale after a while...</p>

<p>does that make sense? i'm really not trying to be a cry baby about it lol.
i woke up this morning and decided to have a great attitude (or at least fake one) for the upcoming week to see if that makes a difference.</p>

20

<p>Did you grow up in MA? Because I know for a fact that even if I liked a school in Worcester, I would NEVER go there. There really isn't anything to do in Worcester, and a lot of it is pretty scummy. I've visited a friend at Worcester State and all we did was sit around. </p>

<p>Try and make the best of Holy Cross, because it is a good school. Go out of your way to find people who are interested in politics like you are.. if you still don't like it, maybe try and transfer?</p>