<p>My son’s procrastination made me grind my teeth last year. In his defense, he really was very busy, with a seriously demanding course load as well as a half-time job he loved. He ended up skipping early decision and applying only regular decision, because he could write his essays over the Christmas break. Even so, he got his applications in electronically about 5 minutes before the Jan 1 midnight application deadline. </p>
<p>He did get in to one of his top choice schools and is very happy. But there were a few weeks when I was reminding myself that, if he ended up missing the RD deadline, he could just work fulltime for a year at the job he already had; it wouldn’t have been the end of the world.</p>
<p>Hard as it is, I think the best strategy is to step back, relax, and remind yourself that your S is nearly an adult and that he needs to learn how to organize his own time.</p>
<p>debrockman: That Miami Honors App is the most extensive of all that my daughter did last year. It was a drag to complete even for my D who is more of a writer than a math person. If your son is not a writer it MAY hurt him some for the Harrison Scholarship, but he should still be okay for Honors. I have 2 D’s in it and they both love it.</p>
<p>Back to the OP. My D was procrastinating big time last year to complete her safety applications. She thought sure she would be going small LAC. I kept telling her it all depended upon merit money as we were not eligible for FA. I became so frustrated that I finally told her that I didn’t owe her a college education. I made her apply to the local state university that would most likely (and did) offer her a full ride with tuition and R&B. That way if she didn’t want to bother applying in time to be eligible for scholarship money she would have a place to go. After that she got busy and I didn’t have to say a word as she knew I meant business! I should have done it right from the beginning, but I never thought she would be the procrastinator. </p>
<p>Sure enough she ended up at the financial safety (not the local) and loves it. Thankfully she got the app in in time to get the money to go with it!</p>
<p>wildwood…thanks for the encouragement My son and I were talking this afternoon and I told him that I wasn’t going to nag him, but he needed to know that the MU Honors app had two deadlines…11/1 and another in December…that he COULD wait til December, but the kids who apply in December don’t hear back til almost March. (Fortunately, his general app is in…and that’s the one that the big automatic scholarship depends on.) That seemed to make him think. He told me he’s going to write one essay today and two more this week and get it done for the early deadline…because he thinks not hearing until February sounds like torture. Congrats to your daughters in the Harrison Scholars program. Great achievement. I am a little confused about what is offered to a Harrison Scholar who is out of state? My son has a 2200 SAT (800 Math) 3.75 GPA (a couple of C’s for making some mature decisions like not participating in class discussion in Spanish because he felt the teacher did not call on kids equally - sigh) he will have 9 AP classes, is a Varsity athlete, has earned some national awards (Spanish being one, believe it or not), commended scholar, lots of church mission work. I’m concerned that his 3.75 might be good enough for Honors, but not likely Harrison.</p>
<p>debrockman: Sorry, I wasn’t clear on the $$ issue. D1&2 are in Honors but neither was awarded the Harrison, though both applied. D2 got the automatic $6500 a year for in-state Honors and her ACT and GPA scores. Two years ago the scholarship program was set up differently. The Honors app is the one that needs all the extra essays. I figured if a student is going to write the essays anyway why not try for the Harrison and get the application in before November 1. You have nothing to lose, you might get lucky, and you can relax after it is done. It was nice to get the acceptance notice just prior to Christmas too!</p>
<p>The Harrison now gives full tuition, not room and board, books travel etc. as it did two years ago. They used to give only about 25 fulls. Now they increased the number of awards to just under 100 (at least that is what it was last year), but limited it to tuition only. Because we are instate, I don’t remember if the Harrison is limited to the equivalent of instate tuition for OOS students, but it most likely is. D1 mentioned the Harrison’s are REALLY brains. My D’s were 4.0/4.0 at the time of application with ACTs in the 30s, but didn’t get the Harrison. Both chose to live in Honors and both love(ed) it. Good luck with your son’s process!</p>
<p>Well I tried to have a heart to heart with S about his procrastination and if this is what he really wanted. He said he is so worried about his current grades that he doesn’t have time to apply. He said he has all next weekend to work on the essay’s. I reminded him that he couldn’t have his English teacher (who is amazing) look over them for him. He went on to talk about how he has no time at the end of the school day because he needs to get together with his college study group, etc., etc., and then there are midterms, blah blah blah. </p>
<p>Wildwood: I think I will discuss the state school with him–they will offer a full ride to any valedictorian. I guess he is exactly what the top universities say they are looking for; a kid with a passion for learning (or is it a passion for getting the highest grades?). His grades are more important to him than college admission. I even tried explaining to him that he needed an A+ in applications.</p>
<p>I guess I don’t get it–when will enough be enough? Why all the hard work if there is no payoff at the end?</p>
<p>^look at the November deadline as freedom from thinking about getting it done and receiving the acceptance letter sooner. It is worth it! I’ll be in your shoes again next year…UGH! Not looking forward to it!</p>
<p>Went through this exact same thing last year with Son. Seems like boys are all alike here!! Video games become a priority all of a sudden.</p>
<p>I made a grid like one mom suggested here and stuck it behind the wall where he played his video games. He was annoyed but he looked and realized the EA date was so close! I told him to just get ONE app done (an easy EA one) so I could see the ‘proof’ that he indeed is able to do it before the deadline. His ‘trust me mom’ was really getting to me…</p>
<p>He did get the essay done and the counselor was kind enough to turn it around in 2 days, she knew him well. I told him that his EA school was a safety so a less than perfect essay would not hurt, the timing was critical. The form takes about an hour to complete if you have all the info handy.</p>
<p>Boys do perform best under pressure! They also hate being pushed. Its tough!! hang in there and don’t give up! My son is doing well in college, no problem with time management it seems.</p>
<p>luchteam–I have a smart proscrastinator son, too, and senior year was so hard to find that balance of support/motivation/nagging/facilitating. To me, if he tells you he’s so worried, this means he needs your encouragement/support, not more pushing. Please don’t tell him that his application also has to be an A+ on top of everything else. Reassure him that you all will get thru this…or just drop the topic. If he doesn’t meet this deadline, there are tons of other schools. Your relationship has to endure this stress. Bite your tongue and read more CC–I was totally hooked on CC during this time, if only to feel connected and productive, in lieu of bugging my son. It worked out for us, with my guy applying at the last minute and getting into great schools, as it will for you I’m sure. Hang in there.</p>
<p>I have a girl, and she does NOT play video games (well aside from occasionally The Sims). </p>
<p>She did her common app essay over winter break. She was up till midnight for each app deadline. She finished her RPI arch portfolio at the last possible minute. </p>
<p>Her essay turned out to be wonderful, as was her portfolio. She did not actually miss any deadlines (unless you count missing the CMU arch portfolio deadline, but that was our fault as much as hers, we had no idea that a Regular admission deadline could come in November.) </p>
<p>I will say I am glad that she will be going away to school and I will not be physically present each time she does something at the last minute in college ;)</p>
<p>He is having a “can’t see the forest for the trees” moment. Bottom line… the applications at this moment may be more important than maintaining his valedictorian status! They don’t name the validictorian at our school until June, long after college apps are done and kids are admitted/decisions made. Even if he slips off his A+ mark for a short period of time, it is more important for him to do his college apps at this moment. If nothing else, strong apps are more likely to bring in merit money at his matches. It can save you a BUNDLE of money if he does a good, timely job with his apps. This would not be optional for my kid… unless he was paying his own way in college.</p>
<p>Hello all - I, too, am a long-time lurker who came to CC specifically for the advice the OP seeks. This fall of his senior year, my beautiful, wonderful, all-around success story of a S started to melt before my eyes. Grades started to slip, motivation disappeared, interest in his intense and demanding EC started to wane, and I started to panic - because if S does not get serious scholarship aid, frankly, he can’t go to college. </p>
<p>I came to this thread often and was relieved to know other seniors were experiencing similar issues with no long-term, adverse consequences.</p>
<p>We finally decided S should switch from AP calc to regular calc to ease his many burdens, and he started to lighten. And then he finished 3 applications, one to his top choice. And then I took a deep breath. He has 3 more to go, but I promised I would not hound or pressure him until after 1st quarter grades were in. It helps that I learned on CC to include self-addressed stamped envelopes with the school reports, so I don’t have to keep nagging and worrying if schools are receiving materials.</p>
<p>But I will say this - I am now ADAMANT he take a gap year. For four years we have planned and plotted and charted our every move for admission to a big school with big bucks, and I think it has taken its toll. Mind you - all our plotting was focusing on one extraordinary EC that he loves rather than going for the pu pu platter option. We did not game the system, but were aware of what courses and tests would best reflect his strengths. DS only took the ACT once, no SAT IIs, no APs. So we’ll keep our fingers crossed for good admission results - and then plan on a possible deferral for a year to recharge before starting another four-year climb.</p>
<p>I want to thank all fellow posters, for your kindness and support to one another. It has done me a world of good to come here and get some much-needed perspective. </p>
<p>Good luck and best wishes to everyone’s DDs and DSs and to luchteam, I know it’s been said, but - hang in there.</p>
<p>High school is stressful, luchteam, and kids get burned out. A gap year may be a really good thing if your son is going slow. </p>
<p>We live in a Boston suburb (one kid in public HS and one in private) in which the parents of high performing kids will figuratively speaking either kill themselves or their kids if the kids don’t get into an Ivy or at the very least, the parents will feel their lives were utter failures. No pressure here. The kids really pick it up. My son (who did get into Ivies) was burned out and took a gap year. He needed it to have a surgery but it was a great thing for him to do. He did his college apps during the gap year, when he was less frenetic with courses and ECs. His sister really feels the pressure (not from me, as I have told her that I agree that she wouldn’t be happy at a top 15 school but from her classmates and the community). She is also planning a gap year, although she is doing her apps this year. Life is not a race. If your son is a bit burned out, make his life easy and apply the following year. If on the other hand, the cause of the procrastination is something other than the intensity of the pressure and the massive senior year requirements, a gap year may not be the answer.</p>
My son and I were talking this afternoon and I told him that I wasn’t going to nag him, but he needed to know that the MU Honors app had two deadlines…11/1 and another in December…that he COULD wait til December, but the kids who apply in December don’t hear back til almost March. (Fortunately, his general app is in…and that’s the one that the big automatic scholarship depends on.) That seemed to make him think. He told me he’s going to write one essay today and two more this week and get it done for the early deadline…because he thinks not hearing until February sounds like torture.