<p>Hi All, this is my first post. My son is a soph at our public well rated High School. Attended a independent middle school, and did very well. Since changing over to public, there is definitely a disconnect between HW, participation at A level to tests drop to C level. Had him privately tested, and was told, no LD, instead son is an out of the box thinker, very intelligent etc. Our dilemma, does he stay at public school and struggling to maintain B's in CP Enhanced courses? Or do we spend a lot of money to have him at The Masters school, that teaches more to his style? He has his interview at Masters next week.</p>
<p>Do you think the outcome would be that much different moving forward? Thanks for any and all advice.</p>
<p>'Or do we spend a lot of money to have him at The Masters school, that teaches more to his style"
as the parent of a very smart, very similar “out of the box” sort of thinker, my vote goes to the school that understands and will stimulate a very smart student, instead of school that doesn’t have the time to spend on someone who thinks differently.
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“Do you think the outcome would be that much different moving forward?”</p>
<p>yup it will. At this age, smart boys who already know they are “different” need acceptance of those differences. spend the money on the best HS education you can get for your son. I’ll bet he’ll be able to land a full tuition scholarship, as mine did, at a college who really wants smart , confident kids who are slightly “different” and have a lot to offer.</p>
<p>Yep, I agree. Experience.<br>
It’s not a good thing to see a smart, creative, passionate youngster frustrated and depressed.<br>
You might chat with his current teachers to glean what their experience has shown them with this kind of student and whether they tend to adjust or become more disengaged throughout the high school years.</p>
<p>Thank you both, it has not felt right from early on. He is frustrated, but hoping it will get better. Now is the time for us to step in. We live in NJ any recommendations for BS? We don"t want him to be too far.</p>
<p>I wish I had had the money to send one of mine to a private school. You can avoid a lot of future (and present) suffering if you have the funds to support a school that fits.</p>
<p>That said, make sure it is a fit. Simply finding a private school with high pressure and high quality may be worse than the public. Often, gifted out of the box students do not need more work, but different work, and more autonomy in learning, as well. And they need to feel valued and understood.</p>
<p>For our child, staying at home during the high school years also proved important. We knew him best and could help him translate the world as the years went on, which helped a lot when he went off to college.</p>
<p>Just our experience, which may be different from yours.</p>
<p>What do you think is going wrong at his current school? Is the drop in test performance due to running out of time, anxiety, a tougher curve in a larger class?
Are there auditory issues for him that are a challenge in a larger public school classroom (but weren’t present in smaller middle school classes)?
Sometimes LD screening doesn’t get at all of the factors that can cause learning challenges.</p>
<ul>
<li>I have no idea where you are in relation to this school but
[The</a> Hudson School - Home](<a href=“StackPath”>http://www.thehudsonschool.org/)</li>
</ul>
<p>and here is a website that among many valuable resources for the gifted, lists websites that identify schools- scroll down to the bottom</p>
<p>I don’t know your financial situation, but Peddie has generous aid and does very well personalizing the education.</p>
<p>If you are in the Trenton/Philly corridor, pm me for day school suggestions.</p>
<p>Have you considered home school or cyber school? It can be a very good option for the right type of student.</p>
<p>Other boarding school that personalize the experience are: George School in Newtown, PA; Blair in North Jersey; Mercersburg Academy in PA. Each school has a different feel.</p>
<p>Can you be specific about his learning style? Does he need hands on? Does he need Harkness/Discussion method?</p>
<p>With boarding school, the application dates have past for most. For a full pay student, you can usually find one to accept you. Boarding schools require SSAT scores. Many private day schools require ISEE. There is an ISEE test date coming up soon.</p>
<p>Definitely figure out what the problem is before enrolling him at a private HS. Otherwise he may still have the problems, not want to tell you because of all the effort you’ve put in, and you’ll be out a bundle of money.</p>
<p>Oh, and I really cannot recommend online schools. The lack of in-person communication with teachers and other students is unacceptable to me.</p>
<p>With a similar kid, we homeschooled and he started taking classes at the community college early; all went very well. Obviously you need to make sure you’re not just enabling bad behavior, but I’m highly in favor of an education that fits. Good luck.</p>
<p>Thank you all so much. He is a great debater, and will probably do best at a harkness environment. The class size is definitely an issue, and his peers do not appreciate his need for discussion. He over analysis, over thinks, making multiple choice problems an issue. We live in northern NJ and I would prefer he not be further then 2hr. He loves stepping up to a challenge and needs the structure that a BS offers. Home schooling is not an option for us. Any school suggestions? Thanks</p>
<p>Harkness discussions are moderated by the teacher to ensure that everyone participates in the conversation. The notion that one student can dominate the discussion misses the point of Harkness - it’s a balanced give and take between all players, not a platform for one student to orally work through his thoughts. There have been a few students like this in my kid’s classes over the years, students who the teachers have to constantly rein in and keep focused. These kids really try to dominate the conversation. My kids say that the other students resent this behavior and find it disruptive. </p>
<p>Harkness is not intended to be a platform for the overly verbose. If your son has difficulty controlling what he says, it may not be the best fit for him. For students, it’s just as important to listen and learn from what others have to say as it is to formulate their own thoughts. Is your son able to listen to other students? Or, is his discussion primarily focused on the teacher? It would be a good idea to shadow and spend a few days in a Harkness classroom to see if it is a good fit.</p>
<p>I agree with everyone that you need to understand the underlying situation before you make another choice. Talk to the teachers. Ask a question or two and then sit back and listen to what they say. Teachers can be very perceptive about the social aspects, learning styles they see etc. Try not to ‘describe’ your son at first…just listen to their comments. That information should help you focus on possible outcomes/alternatives. If you don’t hear anything that helps sometimes it just is what it is with kids that have come through a highly personalized magnet type school…they just aren’t “happy” being one of the mainstreet and never fit the culture or the linear academic path of public schools or something entirely different. My GF went through this and moved her student junior year back to a highly indivdiualized magnet high school and all went much more smoothly, another friend who went through the same thing ended up sending their student to a boarding school. It will help to understand if it’s a cultural thing or an academic thing as someone said, even with boarding schools it’s not all the same…</p>
<p>Finally what does your son say. What is he talking about? What does he think about his grades? Does he think he’s struggling with the courses he’s taking. What are his friends like. Kids change alot from middle school to high school. Make sure you’re also listening to him.</p>
<p>What are CP/Advanced courses? Does your school district have a gifted program? If so, how does a student qualify and what is provided? Did the person administering the previous test identify him as gifted? What is the law in NJ regarding gifted education?
Regarding the disconnect between test performance and homework/participation - is there an anxiety component? Could you meet with the teachers, ask them for their opinion as to what is going on, and ask to see the tests and go over them with your son? If he is very bright, he should be able to learn how to take these tests; there may be some basic strategies to learn (there will be tests in college too).
Is there social/peer pressure to underperform at this school?</p>
<p>Again Thank you all. I find each of your comments so insightful. Yes in some of his classes there is a peer pressure to under perform. That being said, there is a three tier component. As an incoming freshman, he was placed in the top tier. He finished the year with a B-. Due to his midterm and final test scores, he was placed in the second tier for all courses except for English were he remained top tier. This year midterm c’s across the board. B-,B+ average. Same as last year. This with extensive tutoring. So hence, the realization that it is a testing issue. Now comes the evaluation, and the understanding of his learning style, and recommendation to change from content tutoring, to application tutoring…done. Now the question, can he be successful in our public school, and do we take the chance to wait and see?</p>
<p>I’m not sure what a testing issue entails, but you’ll need to attack that whether you stay in a public or a private school. When it’s time for college, the testing will become much more intense; many grades are based almost entirely on the final/midterm.</p>
<p>You may have already done this, but be sure you are aware of all your education options. I’m in a different state, but here we have “open enrollment” in which kids can go to any public school in the state that has openings. My kids (who have learning differences, etc.) have done great in charter schools. Teachers, and for some kids, special ed staff are the key components. I would try to meet with these folks at any school you consider, not just the administrative people who probably won’t really interact with him much (though they can give you a good feel for the school’s overall philosophy). </p>
<p>Hopefully you can determine why your son has trouble retaining and reflecting information during testing. I don’t know anything about this, but there must be some way to improve that function because as someone said in college often the student’s grade is weighted heavily by mid term and final grades. Did your son take the PLAN and the PSAT by any chance. The ACT (PLAN) is heavily “learned/retained” information and the SAT/PSAT is more subjective thinking (if that’s the right word). If there were large differences between those two pre-tests (PLAN and PSAT) that might help you get to the root of what is happening.</p>
<p>Sophomore year is really where you can “see” how and when these kids excel. I would hazard a guess that through middle school most college bound type kids do very well in school. My brilliant sibling had a smattering of Bs and at least a C or a D in high school…he’s the antithesist of a linear thinker. Drove my parents crazy. They laugh about it now. The kid with the college app that had a recommendation that said “most brilliant kid I’ve ever encounted in all my years of teaching please overlook the grades” type comments. Hang in there.</p>