i need you all to score my practice essay like an SAT essay would normally be scored. I got an 8 on the collegeboard practice but id like to do better. The prompt I used was from a previous sat writing test and I pulled it from the collegeboard website. I stop myself exactly at 25 minutes so thats why its not finished. MY SAT IS IN 1 DAY SO PLEASE GRADE THIS FAST.
Prompt:
Do people place too much value on ideas or activities that are practical?
Essay:
In the modern world productivity is one of the biggest desires. while this may be a good thing it can have a negative outcome on ourselves. You can turn this into business robots making us forget why we lest to get so much done. We want to be so productive so we can have a lot of time to be unproductive. People that lose sight of this will often expel practical ideas and activities. To be impractical as a main motivation for being practical. We should encourage impracticality so that we aren’t just moving forward with no destination.
People think that in practical ideas have their purpose. Those that believe this are wrong for everything has a purpose even if its something like going to a movie or playing a video game. Impractical things in life provide stress relief which puts us in a good mood which can only be beneficial. A lot of parents discourage impractical ideas kids think of and encourage high paying careers like being a doctor. Creativity is one of the main contributing factors in why our time is so innovative. We have this idea stuck in our heads that the fun job we want to do is impractical or doesn’t even exist though there are websites like Careerbuilder that can give you an idea what you can do based on what you like to do.
In summary, impracticality fuels our desire for practicality.-END OF ESSAY
Hehe sorry. “You can turn this into business robots making us forget why we lest to get so much done.” Was supposed to say: It can can turn us into a business robot making us forget why we lust to get so much done.
@kingjp98 I’m a little confused as to what you wrote here. You might have confused “practicality” with “productivity,” as “practical” refers to ideas that are real or likely to succeed, as opposed to theoretical.
Why? What is “this?” Are you saying that people that lose the willingness to be productive tend to expel practical ideas?
This is not a complete sentence.
*it’s. But I would use “it is” in a formal essay; you should generally avoid contractions unless directly quoting someone.
Again, what is “this?” (in general, avoid vague words such as “this,” “that,” “things,” etc. - it becomes more difficult to follow, especially if what you’re referring to is not well-defined, and your writing looks like a middle-schooler wrote it. I’m serious here.)
You also have no supporting examples, or at the very least, hypothetical examples. The main point of the essay is to back up your argument using some examples. They can be drawn from current events, historical events, literature, research papers, personal experience, whatever you can think of. To some extent, you can even make up your own examples, since the graders can’t really fact-check every claim you make.
On the 0-6 scale, and comparing with the rubric [url=https://sat.collegeboard.org/scores/sat-essay-scoring-guide]here[/url], I’d probably give a low 3 (i.e. 5 or 6 out of 12).
Also this sentence:
We don’t know what “It” refers to - does it refer to productivity, a negative outcome, or perhaps the desire for productivity?
Also, I don’t know if I would use the word “lust” there (someone else correct me if I’m wrong) - usually lust refers to a strong desire, but in a sexual way.
I bet this essay scores a 4-6/12. It’s poorly written, short, and has no organization. Next time, formulate a thesis, develop the thesis with 3 strong examples, and conclude the essay.
Thank you so much. I chose this prompt because it was the most challenging out of the four for me. I also used talk to type with my phone because I was too lazy to copy from my paper to my computer so thats what’s wrong with some of the vocab. Yeah…I probably shouldn’t have used lust.
Thanks. I’m going to try another prompt tomorrow and see how well I do