“A Stepparent is treated like a biological parent if the stepparent has legally adopted the student or if the stepparent is married, as of the date of application, to a student’s biological or adoptive parent whose information will be reported on the FAFSA. There are no exceptions. A prenuptial agreement does not exempt the stepparent from providing information required of a parent on the FAFSA. The stepparent’s income information for the entire base year, 2011, must be reported even if the parent and stepparent were not married until after 2011.”
So it looks like the OP is probably scrod, unless she can argue that they meet the definition of “separated” because they have no concrete plans to live together. I’m not 100% convinced she can’t do that, because they do say elsewhere that the reason separated parents are not both considered is that they are assumed to be maintaining separate households, which is exactly the OP’s reason for asking the question.
There really isn’t any clear way to prove that they will definitely form a single household at some point in the future instead of declaring the long-distance thing unworkable and divorcing first. They might want to declare themselves legally separated, and consider reconciliation only after all the kids are grown.
It’s kind of strange that this should turn on their long term intentions, which cannot be verified, rather than on their actual living arrangements and finances, which can be verified.
Kelsmom has provided the rules that dictate this situation in post #7.
“For FAFSA purposes, a married couple is separated if the couple is considered legally separated by a state, or if the couple is legally married but has chosen to live separate lives, including living in separate households, as though they were not married. If you and your spouse are separated but living together, select “Married or Remarried,” not “Divorced or Separated.” Note: When two married persons live as a married couple but are separated by physical distance (or have separate households), they are considered married for FAFSA purposes. "
I don’t know if this language was always in FAFSA before this year or a few years ago. The crux of the matter lies into the the definition of living “as a married couple” and " as though they are not married". It could be argued that living the way the OP and spouse are, does not constitute living as a married couple.
I can tell you that my DH and I were separated at times due to work situations, but never did it occur to me or to him to consider ourselves separated or not as a married couple. It would have been extremely beneficial financially for each of us to file as separated HOH, each claiming kids as beneficial for tax purposes, and come to think of it, might have made us eligible and maybe able to get financial aid for some programs and for private school aid. We did pool assets and expenses but had we wanted to take advantage of separation situations, it would not have been difficult to make arrangements to separate things out He had an official other address, not hotel receipts or other temporary housing type situation for some of that time But our state of minds were that we were NOT separated, just temporarily apart in physical distance due to circumstances that had nothing to do with our marriage.
“…or if the couple is legally married but has chosen to live separate lives, including living in separate households, as though they were not married.”
Yeah, that’s why this is an uncertain question. Does this apply to OP’s situation or not? You could make a reasonable argument either way.
And anyone can intend to stop living separate lives. They can even intend to stay married instead of divorcing. Doesn’t mean it will happen. The future has a funny way not happening as expected.
The legal issue lies in trying to prove or disprove intentions for actions (to eventually move into a single household) that are still several years away, instead of going strictly by what you can verify; and then having legal consequences for those never-yet-acted-on intentions. If the OP puts down that she is currently separated from her husband, that’s VERY easy for her to support, and very difficult for anyone to disprove, with the facts given. It seems clear that “separated” is her correct legal status unless and until she and her husband make concrete plans (at least a specific date) and/or take concrete actions (reserve a moving truck, interview for a job in spouse’s area, etc.) towards sharing a household.
Even if the OP intends to move in with her husband half a decade from now, the odds are that it won’t happen. Long distance relationships are very hard to maintain. It’s not pretending to admit that the most likely outcome is not the one you hope for.
So she should put down “separated” as her status, and provide their respective addresses, their job information, her tax returns, her financial records, etc., to support that. Basically, because she can fully support that status being correct. She’s legally separated from her husband (in the scenario given) if at least one of them says they are separated; they have established and maintained separate households and they intend to continue in that arrangement for the foreseeable future. She doesn’t even need to do it herself, if her husband refuses to provide his info on the basis that he considers them to be separated, she has no way to disprove him.
The moral concepts of “right” and “wrong” have no place in legal discussions.
Before everyone does all these moral and legal gyrations, OP should decide whether it is going to change anything. For FAFSA only schools, does the mother alone (and with child support) have an EFC that is low enough to get a Pell grant, subsidized loans, or other awards? If not…For CSS schools, it also might not matter. Those schools are going to want the bio father’s information, and that might put the student outside financial aid territory.
I really think it is going to depend on the tax filing status. If the two file as married, they have combined their households. If they continue to file as separate, I think they have a good argument that they are separate. It’s not an absolute, but at least it would be an indicator (although separated people do file taxes together in the years they are separated because it is usually a much better outcome if they can get along well enough to file together). My sister and her husband file jointly, yet live most of the time separately. He has a job that is about 90 miles from their (hers in name) home. He happens to own a second home near there, that was his vacation home for years and for a time before they were married (titled in his name alone). Everything for him is registered there (voting, cars, insurance). But they are not separated. My friend’s husband has their vacation home listed as his primary residence for tax reasons. Again everything is registered there (he even was called to jury duty), but they file as married.
I stand by the regulations - and if I were verifying the file, I would request a signed statement regarding the marital situation. I have done this more than once when I suspected that the parents were only separated by distance (rather than by a breakdown in the marriage). I am 99.99% certain one family in particular lied - and no, I could not “prove” it, nor was I going to pursue anything legally. It happens - people lie all the time and convince themselves that it’s okay. It’s not.
Kelsmom, is that part of the FAFSA new or has it been on FAFSA for a while?
Twoinanddone, re Pst #26, it would make a huge difference in PROFILE schools as well. If the parents are indeed separated, then there is no need for a step parents NCP financial statement since that relationship is severed. It would be an issue if they were both parents, legally or biologically to the student.
I think the tax filing status is crucial here in terms of being asked the question. If the OP and spouse are filing as married, whether it’s a joint return or a married filing separately, that is a clue as to how they regard their status, though it is not a requirement to file as single, or HOH on the tax return to be considered informally separated on FAFSA.
I know a number of families over the years who are separated by distance but introduce them selves and publically act and have their children refer to them as married, but for tax and school aid purposes they are informally or even formally separated. It can be a huge tax savings to be separated when there is a large income in the picture as one loses a lot of deductions, exemptions as the pay scale go up. But there is no bedroom police and it’s a difficult if not impossible thing to prove if the paperwork and finances are all in order showing separate lives.
and if I were verifying the file, I would request a signed statement regarding the marital situation. I have done this more than once when I suspected that the parents were only separated by distance (rather than by a breakdown in the marriage). I am 99.99% certain one family in particular lied - and no, I could not "prove" it, nor was I going to pursue anything legally. It happens - people lie all the time and convince themselves that it's okay. It's not.
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I would have wanted to snoop on their Facebook accts to see if they’re taking pics with each other or still list themselves as married…take a screenshot and keep as proof. lol
Yes I am a lawyer.
By every verifiable objective measure, they are separated.
Her husband has never lived with or made any contribution whatsoever to raising or supporting her son. If anyone asks, her husband should simply refuse to provide any records beyond those that verify their separation.
It can be as simple as one of them telling the other, “at this point I consider us to be legally separated and leading separate lives.” It takes 2 to keep a marriage going, but only 1 to stop it.
How is this situation different from legally married parents who DO cohabit but refuse to contribute to a child’s education? You still have 2 incomes available. If you were living in the same house and a step parent refused to contribute, would colleges just say ‘okay’ and delete the amount of their income from family assets? I think you’re either a family or you’re not. Just because you can create the appearance of not being one doesn’t mean you should.
This is different because there is NO cohabitation, and never has been. They never both contributed to or supported a same household as each other. Her new husband never helped rear or support her son in any way, not with his presence and guidance, not financially, not health insurance, nothing.
This is basically the same as if the natural parents had legally separated and set up separate households. (The difference being that the natural parents presumably were raising the child together at some previous point in time.)
If separation means that only one of the natural parents is considered to be supporting the child, why should the child who has a stepparent (through no action of his own) be held to a stricter standard? He wouldn’t have to get the financial info of both parents after his father gets kicked out (or gets walked out on), but he somehow has to obtain the financial info of this other guy?
The intent of the rule is very clear: to look at both incomes when a couple is maintaining a household TOGETHER and raising a child TOGETHER.
“I think you’re either a family or you’re not.” I can accept that, if you can accept that, despite the marriage license, these people are simply not a family. It takes more than registering a marriage to make a family, but they don’t have anything more.
Clearly, there is a difference in opinion on this particular situation and others like it. Until the language that Kelsmom cited, I would go with FCCDAD in terms of calling this a marriage. It actually comes down to how the student and his/her parent fills out the forms and how they would answer the question as to whether they consider themselves married if questioned during professional judgment. Personally, and this is not my advice, as I have no legal, no financial aid officer experience standing, given what the OP wrote, I would not answer that question “no” if I were in her situation. I think, however, that a real deal breaker would be if the tax returns are files as married, or as single, however. The tax returns re not required to be filed as married by FAFSA standards, however, but that stipulation of whether the persons “live as married” would prevail. As I said earlier, I was separated by distance and residences and it would not have been that difficult to set up financial things so that they were separate with an “allowance” if I had ever wanted to be considered separated for any purpose, but did not despite tax and other issues that would have been beneficial to us. We considered and introduced ourselves, proported ourselves as a married couple and did nothing to dispel that notion, and neither DH nor I would have felt saying otherwise as a result.
How the OP wants to present this is up to her. If the tax return she files is as a single or HOH, the question would likely not even come up in the fin aid office A married tax return would be a flag, wheter filing separately or jointly, if the states recognize informal separations.
You do not have to be legally married to file as single. If you meet your state’s definition of separated, you can file as such. I am not an expert in tax law, but that I do know.
I would have left the building too I think. The OP should have the info she needs. I think the guidance given by kelsmom in post #7 trumps idle speculation about issues with long distance relationships and other things. The only reason the OP gave for the physical separation is because neither wanted to uproot their kids. She should not give more. Given the 5 year timeframe posted by the OP, the kids are likely at least in high school and will be moving on in that timeframe. There’s nothing about tax filing and other things that have been brought up in the guidance.