Step-Parent's Income & FAFSA

Paying for College
21

<p>" Quite honestly, I cannot understand how a person can marry into a premade family and expect to not contribute to the child's well-being. One doesn't just marry the adult, they are also "marrying" the children. I am sooo sick of seeing threads about step-parents who refuse to help support the children they chose to take on. Its absurd!! " </p>

<p>This is something that has affeced my two children from my previous marraige. It is not my husband and their step-father who refuses to pay anything for them but my ex's wife.</p>

<p>She doesn't feel that " her " money should pay for anything for his kids.
It turned ugly and really did some damage with our girl's relationships with their dad, as well as my ex's family's relationship with his wife.</p>

<p>To the OP I agree with he advice presented here. I would ask the colleges tha your son is inerested in attending what forms they require for their financial aid.</p>

<p>Some use non-custodial parent forms which can make it difficult for your child to get much in aid.
This was a major factor in our 2nd daughter's application process...we stayed away from schools that use a lot forms to determine eligibilty.</p>

22

<p>College costs and how much the family should pay are a big item of dispute in many families where both parents raised the child. It is a point in contention in many families where other things are harmonious. There is no surprise that it can be an issue for a step parent. </p>

<p>Ideally, before two people get married, finances should be discussed and planned. If there are already children involved, it becomes more complex. College is a big financial item and should be discussed. Should it be a deal breaker if a person does not want to pay more than $X towards college? I don't know. Individual choice.</p>

<p>More often, the issue does not come up. It is in the future and who knows what it will bring, it isn't on the list of immediate issues, it doesn't occur to the couple. So it comes down to college time and there is disagreement on who should pay what. With colleges firmly saying that stepparents are on the hook. That is just the way it is regardless of what anyone's opinion of that stance.</p>

<p>To the OP: Ask your step parent to fill out the FAFSA and other forms, because even if your family is not eligible for financial aid, it makes you eligible for the unsubsidized Stafford loan which is one of the few loans available to students without a co signer. You need to discuss with your parents what funds are available for college. This is a discussion that is important in any, every family. You are constrained by what your parents including step parents are willing to pay, and what you can come up with yourself if you do not get financial or merit money.</p>

23

<p>I already asked him to fill out the FAFSA. He says he's not in the mood right now because I'm not polite enough. I think he'll do it eventually though. In the meantime, I'll just fill out everything except for the parent part.</p>

24

<p>RAY2070 - Your posts struck a cord with me. I have a son in the UC system and we have been paying out-of-state costs for 2.5 years. These costs are 2x what our in-state costs are and I can't see any evidence that his education is really any different from what he would receive back home. Your Step-Dad is simply trying to coach you as to the cost-benefit of what you are doing. Would you pay twice as much for an iPOD from California than you would pay for one in your home state? Sure the UC schools sound and look great, but it's the education you are paying for. I'd bet that he will be a lot more helpful and supportive if you would cut down the cost of your plan.</p>

<p>Don't do what I let happen. We hoped that student jobs and/or investments would help pay for this higher UC cost. Now he's a Junior and as his college fund is dry he needs to pack up and come home due to finances. It's much better to start with an instate school or JC and then transfer to the school of your dreams for Junior/Senior year than the other way around. A couple of years living at home and paying lower costs can really help with the finances!</p>

25

<p>RAY2070 - One more thing, Davis costs ~$45,000 per year for out of state (I know from personal experience). It's truly great that you have $8,000 to contribute and I understand that there are loans available. You should figure out how much you'll owe in loans if you go the UC route versus how much you will make in your chosen profession. Paying back $100K or more in loans with simply an undergraduate degree will be a tall order.</p>

26

<p>To NikkiiL, kelsmom, thumper1, kayf, lje62, and all of you who think marrying someone with children should automatically mean you help put those children through college, I say why?</p>

<p>I have 2 step-children who will turn 17, and 19 this year, and the first will be starting college in the fall. My wife and I have been married 2 years. </p>

<p>Why should I have to help pay for college that my wife and her ex did absolutely nothing to plan for, for the last 18 years? To address lje62, it's not that i don't expect to contribute to thier well being; I help make sure they have food, clothing, a roof over thier head, they're both insured on both our cars, and I got them cell phones, which they didn't have when I met their mother. I help make sure they continue living in one of the best school districts in the area. </p>

<p>They were living with thier mother and I, they're now living with thier father. We all three have above average incomes. I get no say in how the kids are raised, or whether or not their grandparents bought them cars, or whether they are asked to pay for anything themselves, or are asked to be responsible for anything, or whether they're expected to do anything around the house, or whether their are any consequences for not doing things they should. </p>

<p>Why should I have to pay college for 2 kids who I get no say in the parenting of? Why should I have to work to put 2 kids through college, who aren't willing to work for it themselves?</p>

<p>Taking care of their well being, is making sure they have all the necessities, college is not a necessity, it's a luxury. I haven't been able to afford to finish supplying myself that luxury, and we are still working on finishing paying my wife's student loans, and all of you think I should put my financial future in jeopardy to put 2 people through college who are only going because it's the expected thing now?</p>

27

<p>it's the government's formula. The assumption being that YOUR income will allow to spend more of HER income to pay for college. If your wife is not working and has no savings or other income, that is a problem,</p>

<p>Had you known your data would be used in financial aid formulas you could have made the choice NOT to marry. A lot of people do that.</p>

28

<p>To add to that ... if the parent and the new spouse have agreed that the spouse should stay home, the new spouse needs to understand that he/she needs to support the stepchild's schooling!</p>

<hr>

<p>That is my comment, and I am sticking to it. Choices are made in life, and every choice has its own set of consequences. If mom chooses to stay home, that is fine. Just don't expect anyone else to pay for college if mom's FAMILY income is such that she <em>could</em> afford to pay for her childrens' education. There are affordable alternatives if the step-father chooses not to spend his money that way. No one is keeping the kids from going to school.</p>

29

<p>Stepdad, I dont think I said a stepparent should automatically pay. What I have said is:</p>

<ol>
<li><p>Both bio parents should contribute, based on ability. Courts should mandate this as part of divorce decree. In Kayf world, courts would be reasonable -- one can provide each parent agrees to pay 1/2 of state school cost, more if either parent makes lots. </p></li>
<li><p>Steps should realized that the feds look at their income -- and carefully plan.</p></li>
</ol>

<p>And I agree, in evaluating bioparents ability to pay, if bioparent is now having family expenses subsidized by step, bioparent has more ability to pay. </p>

<p>What I dont think is fair is that children of divorced families are less likely to further their education than children of intact families.</p>

30

<p>
[quote]
To NikkiiL, kelsmom, thumper1, kayf, lje62, and all of you who think marrying someone with children should automatically mean you help put those children through college, I say why?

[/quote]
</p>

<p>I never said the step parent should pay for college for the step kids. I DID, however, note that the step parent IS contributing to the household expenses for the family. Presumably the bio parent and the step kids are benefiting from this. And if the bio parent is gaining housing costs, utilities, food, clothing , etc., perhaps it might free up THAT bio parent's income/assets to pay the college expenses for their children.</p>

<p>The reality is that when you marry, you become a member of the FAMILY. EFC is an expected FAMILY contribution. But there is no law anywhere that requires that any bio parent or stepparent pay for college costs. However it is an expectation in the financial aid computation formulas.</p>

31

<p>I can relate to the step parent discussion. I have been the family support for many years, divorced and remarried several years ago because I was tired of supporting "3" kids.
My current spouse is the best, most wonderful guy and it sucks that the bio dad does not support, I do not think the step parent's income should be considered, but fair or not, those are the rules. With great kid number one, bio dad was unemployed and supposed to pay half of college so he filed the FAFSA forms...great kid number one received some aidfor 1st 2 years, took out a Stafford loan and did work study. Now great kid number is getting ready to go to college, SAT 1390, Merit Commended, 3.6 GPA. By now bio dad has a job and we are about even in income. The EFC for the step dad and me is 5847. I know we won't get Pell Grants, but will we get considered for any aid?
Thanks</p>

32

<p>Yes. The Cost of Attendance minus your EFC is your "need." Aid can be awarded up to the amount of your need. In addition, unsubsidized Stafford loans and parent PLUS loans are available to help pay for EFC.</p>

<p>Each college is different. Your EFC might yield a package of grants, work study, and loans at School A with the result being that your need is fully met. School B might offer work study and loans, and your need may or may not be met. School C might offer work study, loans, and even grants but your need may not be fully met. It all depends. What you definitely should do is apply.</p>

33

<p>I am widowed and have two minor children but engaged to a guy that makes $100K. I guess I can’t marry him or my kids lose financial aid and I lose my widows pension from SS. Government seems to get me any way they can!</p>

34

<p>

</p>

<p>You married the family, not just the mom. If you didn’t want to help pay for her children, now your step-children, then you should have put off the marriage until the mom was no longer financially responsible for the children. Just my opinion coming from a split family where my mom helped pay for my half-sister’s education (my half-sister who is not my mom’s daughter and has never lived with us) while we went without many things. When you enter into a marriage, remember you are marrying into his/her WHOLE family, not just him/her.</p>

<p>

</p>

<p>Then it doesn’t matter if they’re going to FAFSA only schools. You won’t be asked for your financial information anyway, so it’s a moot point.</p>

35

<p>I agree.</p>

<p>I also think that when parents divorce, the custodial parent (or both) need to insist that something be put into the divorce agreement that contributions will be made to the children’s college educations. I realize that at the time of the divorces, some parents aren’t “thinking ahead,” but lawyers should mention this (especially the lawyer of the lower income or custodial parent).</p>

<p>Frankly, I think FAFSA should include the income of both bio parents. The fact that a custodial mom with a low income is included, but not the possibly high income non-custodial dad, is just silly.</p>

36

<p>This thread is over a year old.</p>

37

<p>^ haha, I thought it was from January of this year. Whoops, gotta remember it’s 10 and not 09.</p>

38

<p>I am a remarried parent of four kids - one graduated, two in college, and the youngest is college bound.</p>

<p>Fortunately my husband knew when he married me what the financial implications of marrying me would be - he took the time to talk to a financial advisor ahead of time. Otherwise how would someone know??? </p>

<p>He certainly does not have the obligation to help pay for my children’s education. I am grateful for his help because of that. We lost the kids’ bio dad to cancer, so obviously he is not contributing to their education. </p>

<p>That being said… SUNY would be an affordable option. SUNY Binghamton is an excellent school, and within a couple hours of downstate NY.</p>

<p>Much luck to you!</p>

39

<p>So disagree with those that think a step parent should be responsible for step child’s education. My husband (my son’s stepfather) gave up alot to help my children over the years. He clothed, fed, put a roof over their heads, and everything else that goes with parenting. I did not see the biological father in any of this! Why should he have to do more than he has already done especially since my son is over 18. If anyone should help it is his biological father. The government has over stepped once again. A child over 18 is an adult and should be treated as such. I love my son, but enough is enough. I put myself through college as have many others before and after me. The government should not have a say in this. If my husband and myself what to help pay that is our choice. My son is working and buying a home, and yet my husband’s income is counted against my son. This is not working for the college student! It is just another layer of nonsense compliments of those who make hundreds of thousands a year and could care less about the low income working families in this country! My son will probably have to drop out of college since they are counting his step father’s income. Total nonsense!!!</p>

40

<p>I agree that the biological parents should have an agreement as to college, not the step parent. The problem is that the government will not recognize any divorce decree stipulations. Fafsa states that the decree was not ok’d by the government, thus is not a valid document for enforcement. Tough luck once again to the college student.</p>