I don’t know what to make of what I would describe as a bizarre alumni interview experience for a school that is very often discussed on these boards. Following my child’s interview, my wife and I were called in for a short discussion, during which the interviewer made some “curious” comments: (1) children from our geographic area are often unprepared for the harsh winter weather; (2) the friendships the children make are not normal, and sometimes blow up, because of the intense competition between students; (3) the atmosphere is always intense and children need access to their parents—we live far away—because they’re still young children; and (4) none of the kids there are just really smart and nice. On the way home, I learned that my child stated in the interview that they liked to do a certain activity that can be done in a very short period of time to relax, to which the interviewer stated that there would be no time to relax but then proceeded to offer that some people recharge by going to mass, temple or the like—a comment that seemed inconsistent with the interviewer’s prior comment, and, in our opinion, inappropriate. At the end of the parent portion, the interviewer suggested that we could visit the campus and interview again with an AO because they see a wider range of kids—something the interviewer indicated that they tell all of their interviewees.
Our takeaway is that the interviewer didn’t enjoy their own experience at the school and/or was trying to activity warn or discourage our child from applying. (For what it’s worth, it’s hard to imagine that this person thought our child would struggle given our child’s stats and experiences.) The interviewer’s comments were so different from the comments received from other schools’ interviewers, and so different from anything else I’ve seen on this board, I’m curious as to whether anyone else has a similar story, and if so, how it played out.
My initial thought was to let this be for now and to send the school an email about this interviewer after the admissions process concludes—I assume the school would want to know if an alumni interviewer is giving candidates a negative impression of the school (even if possibly given with the best intentions of being entirely open). I would say something to the school now but I don’t want any comment that I or my wife makes to be viewed as overbearing or as an attempt to gain some kind of leverage in the process. It’s just a shame that it played out this way for this school in particular. My child participated in, excelled at, and thoroughly enjoyed this school’s summer program earlier in the year, and this interviewer’s attitude came as an unpleasant shock.
We has a terrible interview at one of the big named schools- its a running joke in our house.
It was our last interview/tour after seeing 10 schools on both coasts. When we showed up to our assigned time, there were not enough guides to show the 20 familes around campus. They ended up putting us into random groups of 3-4 families. Our guide knew one of tge families and proceded to talk to them about mutual friends the whole tour. Most of the classroom buildings were closed, the guides walked all 20 families right into the gym where students were taking their SAT’s
and then we ended the tour at a boys dorm. We were led into a boys room who was still sleeping half naked on top of his sheets! Thankfully, this was not our first tour! I’m fairly certain my daughter would NOT be at BS this year. My poor husband was not amused- my kid and I on the other hand could’t stop laughing.
No one wanted to stay for the interview, but we felt like it was just an off day for the school- SAT Saturday- so we gave the school a shot. The AO spent 30 minutes with my kid, 20 minutes talking about himself and the other 10 insulting her about “being southern”. Despite her stats, he must have thought she was stupid because he then proceeded to walk her through the application-
“can you see it…” page by page- can you see it- in your mind… on the left. Can you see it? Every time she tried to talk about herself or ask questions he would interupt her or talk about the application again! While we were in our parents meeting ( not much better btw ) my kid was trying to get coffee and was rudely ignored- until legacys walked in and the entire AO office brought them coffee, juice and " special" food from the back room. It completely turned her off.
She never applied. Late Jan. we got an email and a phone call from them asking if we were still interested in applying. They had recieved her SAT and SSAT scores. They were interested in her. Pretty unbelievable! So do interviews mean everything. nope. But they sure can turn some families off! Go with your gut-
@copperboom thanks for sharing! I hope this turns into a story that we can look back upon with laughter at some point; we are not there yet but your story helps.
That’s so bizarre! The AO was defiantly not representing the school well. Follow your gut when it comes to deciding if you want your child to apply/attend the school. If you don’t kind me asking, what school was it?
All I can offer is that if there is a range of good/bad/ugly AO’s, the range among alumni interviewers has to be even broader! These are folks who do not work for the school on a full-time basis and are probably more likely to overlay their own experiences and perspectives than an AO. Here’s a question: if you have the choice between alumni interviewer or Skype, which do you choose? My quick guess would be Skype with AO.
To me, the alum interviewer tried to discourage you for whatever reasons. But it is obviously not the desirable attitude of the interviewer and you should ask the school AO if you have received the correct information or if you cold visit for the second interview. Interview is two way communication tool and if you don’t think you were properly informed about the school in general, you won’t lose anything by asking.
@CaliPops , have you visited the school in person? Just wondering if there’s a more innocent interpretation – what kid portrayed as desired environment/kind of person kid is or wants to be around actually do differ from what the school offers.
I loved loved loved my son’s school, but there are families to whom I would not recommend it. Not saying the interviewer wasn’t wrong/nutty, just that possibly some important piece of what led up to that comment was lost in translation.
@cababe97 I prefer to not publicly identify the school by name, in part because I don’t attribute the comments of one alum to the entirely of the school.
@gardenstategal My wife and I have been to the school in connection with my child’s participation in the school’s summer program.
No, I completely understand @CaliPops I’m actually from California too. I don’t know where in ca you’re from but the admissions process can be really confusing, especially since going to boarding school isn’t very common in ca. If you have any questions, feel free to pm me:)
This reminds me of the strangest interview I had when applying to college in 1987. The alumni interviewer was about 90 years old at the time, and he asked me what I considered inappropriate questions about my religion and finances. He also flat-out rejected an answer I gave to his question, “How many friends do you have who would loan you a dollar?” I said about 50, pretty much anyone in my class would loan me a dollar, but he was thinking of it as a huge amount of money and said I was wrong! A dollar was worth a lot more back when he was in college, I will give him that. Anyway, I got in despite this awful interview, and I don’t think of him as very representative of the school (but I did choose a different college, LOL!)
I can only imagine that he thought your summer experience may not have been representative of the school year experience. Like the person who spent the summer in Alaska and is talking about how they want to live there and who loved the long days. Or he is confused about his job!
@AppleNotFar I would recommend Skype, if given the option. At minimum, the AOs should have more current knowledge about a wide variety of activities and will presumably be in a better position to gauge the applicant in relation to a larger pool of applicants.
My favorite was a really eccentric character that my son interviewed with. It took place at his work, a widely recognized high profile entertainment business. My son had to sit in a really imposing boardroom and when my son answered the interviewers question on what other schools he was applying to, his response about one school was “Why would you ever apply there- they are known for nothing but trash and snow”.
@CaliPops I just found this thread looking for something else. We had a very very similar experience with an alum of a frequently mentioned school. Had nothing positive to say about their BS, the particular BS in question or the result of BS. Actually told my son he’d be better off staying where he was, if he wanted to get into a decent college. Weird, because this alum sent three kids to BS, two of them to the school in question. I had the same thoughts…should I call the school’s AO? But then, my experience with the AO at the school wasn’t so positive, either, I recalled, when I set up the interview to begin with. So, I never did. My son didn’t get in…he was WL. But the whole experience put the school at the bottom of his list, when it had been near the top. How strange!
@buuzn03 Sorry you had a similar interview experience. It’s surreal to interview with an alumni who makes it sound as if they had a truly unhappy student experience. I will PM you.