@UCBalumnus, my comment is based on the OP’s original post, which stated “they want me to pursue piano professionally.” I read “professionally” as after graduation. This is why I wondered if the parents are taking out loans to pay for her education - if so, they may still try to hold @Aloha927 hostage financially after graduation. Family guilt is a very powerful thing. Plus, after reading through the posts, I don’t see the parents as taking a step back just because she has a diploma in hand, even if she can pay potential loans from a CS job (again, I have no idea if there are any loans!!). The parents may feel so strongly that when financial leverage is gone they give her the choice of pursuing piano or (as you mentioned) becoming emotionally estranged. Fact is, none of us really know the full situation or how far the parents would go to push their own agenda. @powercropper offered excellent advice on how to prepare for this scenario, but it’s heartbreaking. Sending @Aloha927 a big hug!!
I have to seriously wonder whether “expensive private college X” is worth all of this. A “dream school” can turn into a nightmare school very quickly.
Unfortunately is it probably too late to transfer in time for September classes, but I have to wonder whether transferring to an less expensive alternative might be the right thing to do.
It seems like emotional estrangement is already a foregone conclusion in this situation.
I think that planning for estrangement/independence and thinking about transferring are extreme measures. Again, I would try to deal with this head on, now. With the help of a third party.
One approach might be for someone to back up the idea that their tactics are perfect for making someone hate the piano, that their strategy is psychologically misguided, and that the best way to encourage piano is to step back and let their child take a break, find inner motivation and choose to play.
A freshman psychology student could tell them this! Motivation needs to transfer from external (parents) to internal (self). And forcing it only destroys the latter. There has to be an element of enjoyment.
The irony is that most parents would love their child to switch from music to CS. I understand the investment in talent, for many years, but holding on to those dreams of fame and success means that the piano is for them, not for the child. That is the real problem: living through one’s kid is never ever healthy.
Let’s be realistic: it can take a lifetime to gain detachment from the flaws of our parents, in many cases. And attachment continues even in situations of actual abuse. I think it is a lot to ask of this young person, to anticipate a break in the relationship, but that may be necessary ultimately.
Still, getting some help so the parents can try to negotiate the transition to adult autonomy for their child would be a first step, and if that fails, then other things may need to happen.
Thank you everyone for all the advice - it makes me so happy that this community is so supportive! I really appreciate it.
Unfortunately, I think my parents would still have the same views on piano even if I had attended a cheaper college - aside from financial reasons, the main reason they wanted me to attend the school near home is so that they could monitor me and my piano playing more closely. The only way would be to pay for college myself, but that would be extremely difficult, if not impossible, and would estrange me from my parents.
@jmek15 Thanks for the support! Yeah I’m an only child. My parents haven’t taken out any loans, so I guess financially, I’m free to do whatever I want after I graduate. I’m pretty sure they would cut me off emotionally if I were to quit piano after graduation though, which is something I really want to try to avoid if possible.
@powercropper Thanks for the advice. Yeah I’ll definitely make sure that I have a job lined up after graduation - I definitely want to be financially independent after I graduate and although I don’t want to have to cut ties with my parents, I guess it’s important to have that available as a last resort. My parents are against me having a job during term time. I think they’d be supportive of me getting a paid internship during the summer though, as long as I have enough time for piano and can take lessons from my teacher, so I’ll look into that.
@compmom Yeah, I personally think that getting the help of a third party would be helpful too. Unfortunately, I don’t think my parents would ever agree to that though - bringing this up would most likely make them more angry, since I think they’d interpret it as me questioning their method of parenting.
If things get really bad and you need a last ditch effort, you can always develop tendinitis in a finger or two; the only way to heal that is through rest… 
I guess maybe this is just me - but there is no way I would allow myself to be hog tied that way by my parents (or anyone for that matter) for any school or anything else either. I would free myself of that quickly and find my own way. At the age of 21 my parents told me if I moved in with my boyfriend (who later became my husband - we had dated for years and were both financially independent and graduated from college) they wouldn’t pay for my wedding. I said OKAY and when about my business. NO WEDDING was worth it, and honestly I cannot imagine a college worth it either – you can get educated without selling your soul. I am not cool with all the sneaking around being suggested – honestly and a backbone is best.
If her parents disown her and throw her out, how does that serve her? Asserting independence only works if you can actually afford to be independent.
I think OP should get a job during the school year and save as much as she can so she she can afford to go where she wants after graduation. She might wsnt to get a bank account and have the statements delivered online to an email address the parents don’t have access to, and get a prepaid phone if she needs to take business calls (for lessons, etc.).
The only thing OP is going to get by refusing to do what her parents want is to have their financial support pulled. As long as she’s financially dependent, she has to be careful. When she gets a degree and has the money to get to interviews and a new job, then she has a stronger footing. I wouldn’t tell the parents she no longer likes piano now, and I wouldn’t bother explaining it after she graduates either. I’d just be “too busy” to enter competitions and I’d never host another Skype practice session. But I don’t think OP can afford to do that now.
I agree with toomanyteens and think this needs to be approached directly and asap, but carefully with a third party who can explain some things to the parents.
Are they really going to throw their kid to the street?
If you are in CS, you can probably get a good paying job of some sort and go to school part-time, if your parents really mean what they say.
To play at a professional level, you must be practicing 4+ hours a day (including exercises, conditioning…) However I cannot imagine they monitor you for that many hours. So, just go to lessons and do the monitored practice. Skip the rest (and don’t feel guilty!) Treat this as your part time job to pay for college -12 hours of work a week doesn’t affect grades so stick to 12 hours of lessons+practice+rehearsal per week.
I understand that in their mind, they’re placating you with your funny desire of going to college, learning stuff, doing CS, which takes time away from the important thing, IE., piano, which in their eyes is your destiny. They may thus worry your “distraction” (college) takes away from “what matters” (piano) and since you know their distorted view, are trying to get out from it, but are still under its weight, it puts you under a lot of pressure. I thus third the advice of using your college mental health resources and seeing a counselor.
Where are you right now? Home? On a concert tour? On campus?
How many hours of sleep do you get a night right now? During the semesters?
No one can be a professional piano player against their will. In fact, many child prodigies find that they no longer want to continue with the instrument they used to live for and thriugh. Often, they realize that they’re confused with their instrument and haven’t developed a separate identity. In order to truly become musicians they need to develop that identity, to feed their music. Without that level in maturation, they remain excellent players but aren’t musicians. Some simply decide the sacrifices aren’t worth it and move on to a glory-less life that ends up more fulfilling. You may or may not become a professional artist, but you can’t play music if you’re a shell. Your parents can’t understand that yet but you’re right to want to figure that out for yourself.
@austinmshauri I don’t believe for a minute they would really throw her to the street… it is a psychological control game. Like I said, if it was me. I would get a job and go to CC at night before I allowed myself to be manipulated that much – But not everyone is me.
We can’t know that, @toomanyteens. What we, as adults with contacts and paying jobs would do, is very different than what a teen with zero resources can do. Where do you suggest OP live while she takes these night courses?
It is a game and OP needs to be smart at it. The requirements are clear, and she can get what she wants, long term, if she paces herself, gets counseling support, and lays the ground work for independence.
I guess I am just more cantankerous than most – I moved out and got a job and my own place. It was a struggle but was worth it to me.
Me too toomanyteens. But in this case I am hoping that the parents can come to understand the needs of a young person this age for autonomy, and that they can come to an understanding. Better to try to preserve relationships than to plan for estrangement. And honesty will bring that about better than subterfuge. In my opinion. I understand those of others though 
Lots of good advises and suggestions. My feeling about this is that there might be strongly ingrained cultural restraints that could be preventing the OP from following through on some of the direct confrontational recommendations that are more the norm in western culture. I suspect the OP is Asian???
I did wonder about that. That might also explain the parents’ behavior (and the student’s apparent acquiescence so far), but I didn’t want to mention cultural stereotypes. Then again, I always feel badly making assumptions based on Western cultural norms too. I have friends (and yes the mom is Asian) who have pushed their daughter in a similar fashion with piano, and her entire childhood was filled with the pressure to practice and play. She ended up switching to cello in late high school and singing in college, so she stayed in music, but not seriously. She was a prodigy really.
There are actually counselors who are very good with this kind of cultural challenge, but not sure how the meeting could happen because the son would need a third party to arrange it.
The music forum really might be a good resource here.
@compmom As I have said before my youngest daughter was a competitive figure skater for a very long time. I remember clearly sitting next to a couple of other skating moms at a competition (I didn’t know them really but I knew who their daughters were) – one of the moms was Asian and she said “I knew my daughter was going to be a figure skater as soon as I found out I was having a girl” – I don’t think the daughter got a choice.
OP do you have a third party family member or family friend that you can ask for help in dealing with your parents if the counselor route is unworkable. Preferably someone more senior than they are.
Can’t boys figure skate too?