Our son’s school asked seniors to pretend they write a recommendation letter about themselves and submit it to the counselor. We’re not sure how to approach this. He’s targeting top schools so of course we want the counselor’s rec to be over-the-top wonderful, but it feels very weird to brag a lot, and maybe this could turn the counselor off? His counselor is new this year, doesn’t really know any students and already has a reputation of being unhelpful. Any advice? I’m worried a tepid letter could hurt his application. Hopefully he’s going to have nice letters from teachers and research mentor. I’m also filling out a parent’s brag sheet but I’m not really a great writer.
A good rec letter is anecdotal, based on specific narrative stories. The praise/boasting part isn’t important at all (and obviously any adcomm would take it with a grain of salt anyway).
Since the counselor is new, any notes you and your son can get to that person would be a good thing. Perhaps your son could ask one of the other counselors about what should be included. Your son could also meet with his counselor in person, and ask them about this. The rumor about being unhelpful might not be true at all.
Insecurity can easily be construed as being unhelpful when you’re two weeks into a new job. Your son should take advantage of this potential opportunity to help the GC get to know him. He should also make an appointment to meet and introduce himself, review if he is on track for graduation, and judge his new counselor’s abilities for himself. I understand this is a difficult and awkward assignment for a teen, but if you can help him take a step back and see the big picture, it might make the chore go easier
My son’s school has the kids fill out info sheets as well as the parents. Maybe this is just the GC’s way of having the kids provide that info?
This is kind of like writing a “brag sheet” but I guess in narrative form.
Read this: http://mitadmissions.org/apply/prepare/writingrecs
This is what our GC’s ask for in a brag sheet from students:
- Which major do you intend to pursue in college?
- Please describe your career goals.
- List 5 adjectives that best describe you?
- What are your proudest accomplishments? Academic? Personal?
- What extra-curricular activities have been most meaningful to you? Why?
- What jobs have you held during high school? Has any one job been especially meaningful to you? Why?
- Are there any circumstances in your life that might have had a negative impact on your academic performances?
- Are there any factors about admission test scores that you would like us to address?
- Are there any other factors that you would like us to share with colleges?
- Please list your immediate family members (parents, siblings only) who have graduated from or currently attend college:
This is what our GC’s ask for in a brag sheet from parents:
- What do you consider to be your child’s most outstanding accomplishments during his/her high school years? Why did you select these as most important?
- In what areas has your child shown the most development and growth throughout high school?
- What do you consider to be his/her most outstanding personality traits?
- If you had to describe your son/daughter in five adjectives, what would they be?
- Are there any unusual or personal circumstances which have affected your child’s educational experience or personal experiences?
I would take this opportunity and run with it! Many GCs don’t know every student well, and this is one way to feed your GC the things you want to highlight. Our GC told us she used some of the exact wording from my son’s and and my brag sheet in her LOR.
@yucca10 This is a good thing!!! We submitted something like a resume which highlighted extracurricular activities, volunteer work/hours, special awards, leadership positions, etc. Not only does this help the GC in writing letters of recommendation, it also helps them identify which kids are matches to scholarship opportunities.
@chercheur The resume is easy, it’s the part of actually pretending to write a letter about yourself that stumps me.
Tell you son to imagine he is writing about someone else with his character and resume. Be modest, but take this assignment carefully and seriously. The GC may very well use it! High output LOR writers (teachers, GCs) often have “form letters” that they cut and paste from to piece together LORs for candidates. This new GC may not have any of that - or what he has from his old school may not be appropriate or may not apply. So your son’s letter could become the basis of his own LOR. Terrific opportunity!!
Have DS start brainstorming with, “Here is what I want you to know about “son”…” (personality and character traits, ECs and how they illustrate those personality and character traits; this is what he wants to study and here’s why he would benefit from AwesomeU; awards won; GPA & course rigor).
Talked to the counselor today and she said parents and student can write a letter together and skip a brag sheet. This makes it a lot easier, as he’s a better writer and I have no problem with bragging 
Glad it worked out! Thanks for letting us know, and good luck to your student!