HELP - currently live in a suite style dorm with three sets of roommates that share a common room. One girl who lives in the room next to me has such insane body odor that it has caused the entire suite, the entire bathroom, and almost the entire floor to smell like horrid body odor. She only showers once a week and only brings a towel (no soap or shampoo) to the shower with her. The odor has become completely unbearable. Any suggestions on how to ease the stench would be much appreciated
Thanks
For the suite, Fabrize. Lots of it. For the bathroom, clorox. Lots of it. For her? Well, if you can do it kindly give her a gift of soaps and shampoos.
Ask the RA to speak to her. That is what I did when I had this problem.
Has anyone first politely pointed out this issue to her – if none of you in the suite are friends with her or if you have tried and she doesn’t pay attention, maybe find a common friend to broach the subject? Some people grow up in an “au naturel” home environment and are oblivious. If she is aware, and makes no effort or is outright hostile, then the room freshener, soap/shampoo, escalating to the RA discussion may be the only path.
If you want to talk to her: “Roommate, I know this is a difficult topic but we are at the point that I feel I must say something. I wanted to talk to you directly…you need to shower daily, and use soap (hand her a bar of soap). Otherwise the smell is just too much. We love you as a suitemate, but you need to change your hygiene habits because what you are doing isn’t working… If you have any kind of medical issue that prevents this, please go to the housing office and talk to them about getting a single. I know this is embarrassing, but I would rather talk straight to you about it then have suitemates complain under their breath.”
If not, go to your RA and talk to them about it. RAs are students too so follow up with them and ask if they have talked to the roommate.
This is a tough issue. I worked overseas in a country where it was not in the culture to wear deodorant and it was not uncommon for many of my coworkers to smell bad. We tried many different ways to hint at it but nothing worked except having the uncomfortable conversation. The issue is also that once BO gets into clothes, it is very, very difficult to get out of the clothes so it is not that easy for the offender to fix right away…I do not think the person that smells bad can tell they smell bad…good luck.
Uh oh. So many shamers. You should embrace her essence as doing otherwise would be appropriating her selfhood and most likely be racist in some tangential way. In a sane world, someone could have the difficult conversation but in today’s world you might find the stewards of your college experience a tad feckless.
On a different note, apart from “cultural” considerations, she might have mental problems. People who grow up in USA don’t stink without realizing it. If she does not realize it, she might have a defective ability to realize, like psychosis for example. I think the advice to start with the RA is good advice so you don’t inadvertently become the villain.
Sounds like this is happening already!
Not necessarily. One of my employees was a hippie dippy type who apparently protected our natural resources by showering rarely and used some “natural” deodorant that did nothing. She stank. I dreaded having to discuss the issue, but blathered something about how her routine wasn’t quite doing the trick. I felt terrible, because she must have been mortified. I truly believe that she and her husband, who had the same hygiene habits, had gone “nose blind”, as the commercial puts it, and had no clue they were offensive. My raising the issue did the trick.