<p>To those of faced with choices:</p>
<p>Two years ago my D was struggling with deciding where to go. She had an early write letter from Swarthmore, which made her feel great, but she was uncertain about whether she would be happy in light of some of the things that she had heard and vibes that she had picked up while visiting Swat on three different occasions. </p>
<p>Her biggest concerns were the schools pressure cooker reputation and whether there would be room to have fun and act silly. She had no doubt about the reputation for outstanding academics and opportunities for involvement in social causes, attributes that mattered to her. She was uncertain, however, about whether the students would be so committed to their causes and academics, that they would never take time to stop and do silly, uninhibited fun things (sort of like the Monty Python type of humor, for lack of a better description. My description, not hers). I should add, that although genuinely committed to social causes, she has always been frustrated by extreme political correctness and she was concerned that her brand of humor, which is sometimes incorrect, might not be welcomed. </p>
<p>My D ultimately decided on Swarthmore, knowing that she could always transfer, and left for school not totally convinced that she had made the right choice. </p>
<p>Two years later, I am glad to share that she has had no regrets and cannot think of a better school for her. She has a wonderful group of friends with whom she can be socially conscious, at times politically incorrect, academically engaged and take the time to act silly as well. However, from the bits and pieces I have picked up, coupled with some very earnest conversations that we have had, I would have to agree with the topic of this thread, that Swarthmore is not for everyone… </p>
<p>Schools, just like people, have personalities. Swarthmore is definitely not a healthy choice for a student whose self worth and over arching goal in college is dependent on getting straight As; just like a school overrun by fraternities and sororities and football games would not be a good fit for someone like my D, who is fiercely independent, outspoken and more inclined towards the arts than team sports. </p>
<p>Although my D is very happy at Swat, I would be remiss if I did not disclose that she does have her bouts of frustration with all the work that is assigned. I have heard her whine about lack of sleep and overwhelming amount of reading. Yet when I have suggested that she needs to cut back on the things that she takes on, or the late night talks with friends, that rob her of her sleep, she is quick to say that those are some of the things that she loves most about being there and will not have it any other way. </p>
<p>Like many other Swatties, she is overly extended, but she thrives on this, just as she did in high school. However, despite the hard work and sleep deprivation, I believe that she is happy because she knows how to decompress (Yoga is an important part of her life), makes time to get away from campus on a regular basis, and most importantly, does NOT obsess over grades. </p>
<p>From what I have been able to discern, many students who are unhappy or who find themselves in an unhealthy depressive state, seem to be the type of student who feels overwhelmed because they must get that A and feels like a failure because despite working hard he/she did not get the A. This is particularly hard to accept for students who have excelled academically all their lives, and lets face it, of those who have been accepted, who has not been outstanding? </p>
<p>It just so happens that my D is doing very well academically, but if she were not, I believe that she would still be happy because the schools climate is one in which she is comfortable. However, grade obsession is not the only source of unhappiness. A student for whom the ideal college would revolve around the more typical scene of football, fraternities, sororities and the like, would be disappointed at Swat. Small campuses, not just Swarthmore, can be suffocating if a student is out of synch with the rest of the student body.</p>
<p>Without nothing to back me up and just based on my gut instinct, I would venture to guess, that a student whose decision to apply to Swarthmore was based on rankings and not on familiarity with the ethos of the school, who while in high school set out to accomplish extracurricular activities to impress adcoms and not because he/she was genuinely driven by some sort of passion, would not feel very happy in the Swarthmore bubble and would have a hard time adjusting. </p>
<p>Thus as you go forward in making your choice, do take a hard look at yourself and be brutally honest. If you fell in love with the school mainly because of rankings and not because of its other attributes, you need to figure out if you can live with a less than perfect average. If you cant, I would encourage you to accept elsewhere. But if you are really passionate about something and like to learn for the sake of learning without regard to what grade you may earn, Swarthmore may just be the place for you…</p>