Many of us, including my family, will be undergoing this crazy thing called college admissions next academic year (HS Class of 2023).
I’ve learned so much during the several years on CC from parents and students, and it frankly has profoundly shaped/changed the way I think about admissions and beyond.
Since I guess we are at the basic end of RD admissions for HS 2022, it would be great to hear your thoughts on things you wouldn’t do again for your/your student’s admissions process. Perhaps this can help all of us, and most especially future applicants, to avoid common pitfalls etc.
Based on the changes I’ve seen in myself over the last few years and with the clear disclosure that our family will only go through this process next academic year, I’ll start it off and say:
Don’t be obsessed with rankings - I am a reformed believer in rankings, subscribing to the notion of “top schools.” Now, I know there are tons of GREAT schools out there. Rankings are a subjective thing. Rankings shouldn’t be entirely dismissed, but they are one of many datapoints. And also look at multiple rankings and see, if possible, if there is trend among the various rankings.
Research as much as you can - I am learning stuff every day about this process. For most of us, “back in the day” it was nothing like this. Sites like CC etc. are great for that research. For example, for several “top schools”, the GPA and standardized test scores are not exactly what the seem. Dig deep in the numbers, and check things out like the CDSs, where available, for every school to which your student wants to apply.
Make the list of reaches, targets, and safeties as conservatively as you can - Take NOTHING for granted, and have numerous options at every level.
This is about the student applicant, not their family - I finally realized that admissions has nothing to do with me as a parent. Rather, it is my obligation to my children to advise and, where possible, make them aware of opportunities. Most of all, it’s simply being there. But it is NOT my decision. It is the decision of my children as to where they want to go.
There are probably about a zillion more, and this is coming from someone who hasn’t been through the process for my students.
Like I said, I’ve learned so much from so many of you. It would be great to get your thoughts, particularly from those whose families have been through the process most recently.
I wouldn’t push them to do their essays, EC lists or Common app early. There is plenty of time to get it done in the Fall and no need to stress and pressure them early.
Pick one of two true safety schools and love them, and then apply to a limited number of others. My S21 applied for performing arts and we were so worried about getting in that he hugely over applied. He got into his safety and his reach, he did not need 15 in the middle.
Sort out the finances first. Decide what you can afford and then run the net price calculators for different schools. The prices varied quite a bit for us and knocked out a good number of schools at the beginning of the process. Decide how you feel about loans. There’s a lot of good info on this site regarding the financing of higher education and the ways different schools approach the matter.
Try not to have a dream school. Teach your kid to not have a dream school.
As much as possible, let (or encourage) your kid to have agency in the process within your family’s financial limitations.
Good luck with the process. I know it can be anxiety-inducing for many. I reminded my daughter of her 2nd grade teacher that was a big advocate of reframing feelings of nervousness and anxiety into excitement for her students. It’s a truly exciting process! Mistakes will be made, regrets will be had, second guessing will abound, but in the end your kid will find a place to continue their learning and you will burst with pride when they set off. Your heart will be in a million pieces but that’s a story for another day…
Mine would be to take a good look at each college’s NPC. I don’t have to be miffed that I didn’t, because they weren’t around when my older two went to college and I did use it for my youngest, but I wish they had been around for all.
Also look at scholarship possibilities because that can change the equation considerably (but I did that). Just listing it here because the two go hand in hand.
Application time (including visits) doesn’t need to be wasted on schools that are almost 100% unlikely to be affordable.
Start in the summer if applying to more than 6 schools: it is way too much to get done if common app and the main essay are not even started by fall. There can be unexpected additional essays and supplements that only become apparent/available after submission, as well as the work of applying for scholar/honors programs and interviewing. Fall of senior year is busy: grades have to be kept up, and they need to be able to have some time to enjoy being a senior.
Make it very clear to your student before the apps are sent if you have any budget restrictions or schools for which you will not pay (ie, if they get into cheaper options or options that you consider a better investment).
Encourage focusing on finding positive things about all schools, and having a large number of “favorites” that are not all reaches. Students should not fall in love with one school or with only reaches.
We encouraged out kids to start drafts of essay ideas early. They just kept a word comment with sentences or paragraphs. The summer before senior year, they honed these and started writing essays.
Both of our kids applied to EA and rolling admission schools very early and had multiple acceptances before Thanksgiving…and I suggest this for everyone. That first acceptance is very sweet!
Our kids both had most of their college applications completed and submitted before October 15. Each did add one additional college in November. But both said…getting this done early made their senior years ever so much nicer. They watched classmates completing applications during the winter holidays, and were so glad theirs were done.
I’d try to get main essay done in summer. Parents and student need to have real conversations about which schools on list are affordable, which require scholarships and which are great financial fits. Then use that financial knowledge to manage expectations for acceptances. I’d also say don’t be afraid to apply to schools out of reach financially IF student can understand that going there will require scholarships. These days there’s a lot of privates that give incredible scholarships. Dont’ be afraid to apply to any school due to finances just be well aware that scholarships may be necessary to make it realistic.
From a 2021 applicant; I would have listened to my original gut instinct about which schools to apply to. I felt like the size wasn’t what I wanted, but I let my anxiety take over and spent more time and energy on schools that wouldn’t have been a good fit. It all worked out though!
I also would have managed my time a bit more efficiently and stuck to the plan I had mapped out. My anxiety with the pandemic and college in general led to me adding more schools to the list later in the application process (including above mentioned schools that weren’t right for me), and gave me additional stress that really wasn’t worth it.
I realize this won’t work for people who need to apply to lots of schools for financial or other reasons, and the pandemic has made things more competitive, but if you are in the position to narrow the list of schools you or your child is applying to, I would. And as hard as it is, try not to second guess things too much. I do believe that things will work out the way they are supposed to!