<p>My S applied to several schools with film production programs. One of them, FSU, interviews top applicants for their film school before making a final selection. A few weeks ago, here on CC, I started hearing that invitations to interview had gone out. I told my S. He got very annoyed and said he didn't want me to tell him what I heard on my "stupid college forum". (That's right...he called you guys stupid!) :-)</p>
<p>Paying3Tuitions and I were discussing this by PM, and she suggested that the information flow should probably go from the school to the kid rather than from the school to someone on CC to the parent to the kid. Hmmmm....that was food for thought.</p>
<p>So, I resolved to stop checking the online status reports (very hard for me!) and just let him find out on his own. Last week I came home one day and asked S, "Have you checked your schools yet today?" He hadn't, so he proceeded to do that. All of a sudden there was screaming and jumping. His status update for Chapman U (with a film production major) said "Admission Approved". I was so, so glad that he had been the one to find out rather than me telling him!</p>
<p>Yesterday I read here on CC that USC has just sent out a round of acceptances (apparently some who live in California got theirs on Saturday). I just bit my tongue and didn't say a thing to S. If he should get an acceptance, I want it to come as a wonderful surprise to him, just like Chapman's was. If it's a rejection, he'll be perfectly fine with it since he is so excited about Chapman. It is his process, not mine (even if I did find out a lot of helpful info here!).</p>
<p>I just thought I'd share that in case others of are tempted as I am to be your kids' information filter.</p>
<p>Thank you for sharing your insight. When you think of how involved we parents have been with the upbringing of our kids, most notably during the application process, it is hard to step back. A necessary step in our "evolution' as parents. DD is now a freshman in college, and I am not given a transcript for her grades, nor am I privvy to any health issues-if any. So, parents of seniors, it is good practice for you to step back this year and let your senior find out their application status. It will help you deal with their being away at school next year. All the best-APOL-a mom.</p>
<p>Yes, I know it's hard to keep quiet when roaming CC....I have learned to bite my tongue since December (although very difficult)....the one thing I find very helpful, though, is that when I have the "heads-up" before my d that something may be coming, I can prepare myself in case it's "bad news".....I try very hard not to be the information filter.....</p>
<p>"I told my S. He got very annoyed and said he didn't want me to tell him what I heard on my "stupid college forum". "
This is exactly the same reaction I got from my son 2 years ago! FYI, it may be a first sign of "helicoptering " [of which I was guilty as charged]</p>
<p>As a student waiting for decisions, I think you definitely maid the right choice. I'm going on a senior retreat starting on April 1. I told my mom to just stack up whatever mail I received while I was gone, and not to celebrate or cry about anything based on the size or thickness of various envelopes until I got home.</p>
<p>I feel privileged that I am allowed to open the envelopes and report by phone or text the results. No waiting around for D to get home at 5:00 to find out.</p>
<p>I recall being ordered NOT to even go to the mailbox two yrs ago when my first was awaiting her reply from her first choice school.</p>
<p>But I will say that my second got the cue to check her online status from her first choice because of what I was reading here....
She did her usual eye rolling, but logged on to find out she was accepted.</p>
<p>Now, I wish she would log onto her other schools, mostly to just satisfy my curiosity</p>
<p>I have been checking CC much too often in the hopes of finding out when schools that my D applied to have started sending out decisions. I would never pass the info on to her, but like an earlier poster I'm trying to prepare myself for possible bad news. No matter how often I try to go cold turkey and not check CC, I fail...I would never open her mail (I have held the envelopes up to the light, however!) , but I did tell her that if she gets an acceptance in the mail (i.e. if the envelope itself spills the beans) while she's at school I'll attach balloons to the mailbox! April 1 can't come soon enough!</p>
<p>My S told me last night that he wants to wait until he gets the letters. Does not want to even check on-line. He even has toyed with the idea that he will wait until all letters are in and then have a "opening party". I have told him that this is fine with me, but I will continue to check on-line to make certain that FA stuff is taken care of. He has also asked me to be his filter around the end of this month where I check his email for anything from the schools and forward them to myself and delete it from his email so he won't be tempted to check.</p>
<p>Personally, I do not think he will last until all letters are in, but I have faith that he can wait for the letters rather than checking on-line.</p>
<p>Good luck to all parents. May all your children's dreams come true.</p>
<p>Your post came at a perfect time. My husband has even been telling me that I'm obssessed with this whole college thing. I'm always checking CC to see what schools have released decisions etc. Your words are just what I needed to hear. I hope you do check this site again to see the wonderful "Thank you's" for your words of wisdom. As parents, we want to do the best for our kids and we don't want them to miss any opportunity possible, but you are right, it is "their" process not ours. </p>
<p>They have earned the right to be the first to find out, good or bad news.</p>
<p>The voice of experience: I am not checking on the status of decisions because when I did it with my S's EA school, it was a huge letdown when he was not accepted. I think that if I had not obsessively checked CC, I would have been as calm as he was (he does not use CC).</p>
<p>Warning: With acceptances, it doesn't end with learning the decision! I am seriously having to hold back from finding and dispensing information about the whole housing, course registration, and orientation process. I think he was relieved when I said I would offer no opinions about his course selection unless he asked. Some days, I think that going to college sounds much more fun and exciting than working. Hmm--I never got a master's. . .</p>