<p>Marite asked:
[quote]
Soozie:</p>
<p>Did you feel that the NYT review (which highlighted the negative anecdotes) or the more rosy Slate review gave a truer picture of the book's overall contents and tone?
[/quote]
</p>
<p>Hmm, that's hard to say. My recollection of the NYT review (which I may be forgetting at this juncture) was that it provided a long excerpt from the book. That excerpt certainly painted a pressure cooker and also how the private counselor thought Julie was not Stanford material even though she was a top student with achievements outside academics, etc. So, I recall coming away from that article thinking, whoa. The Slate review seems to be saying that these kids are not unlike many kids and that they aren't college crazed but simply achievers, etc. That was a little rosy, though inside, I do think lots of these kids were like other top achievers who are internally driven and enjoy their activities and so on. But these kids were in a pressure cooker environment, no question. The Slate article barely recognizes that. AP Frank's enviroment was one extreme. But these kids were comparing SATs the day they came out and just lots of that sort of thing going on at that school and in those families.</p>
<p>Overall, I think Robbins has written a good book and I am enjoying reading it. She discusses all the issues and then also provides these anecdotes. It certainly paints a picture of the admissions frenzy in some communities, just not the one where I live for sure. </p>
<p>While your sons' HS differs in many ways from ours and same with your community, I have seen many parallels over the years. Truly, I didn't see kids here compare scores, colleges, compete with one another, vie for class rank, cry over colleges, etc. It is not the big topic among parents either. The kids who are high achievers tend to be internally driven. I don't see parents here putting pressure on kids like I see in the Robbins book. I can speak only from my own experience as never pushing our kids. We had no specific college expectations and we let them pick where they wanted to apply and attend. We didn't care which majors they picked (read AP Frank for the opposite extreme). We didn't dictate which activities they did. To be honest, our kids pushed us! They wanted to do this or that and we drove 'em all over the place to do it. We never pressured them with grades. We only cared that they always did the best they could. There were no rewards given out or anything. They wanted to do well, and I do realize that many parents grapple with kids who are not motivated in this way and luck of the draw, this part was not an issue with my kids. We didn't make them do things. They wanted to. They have high expectations for themselves. </p>
<p>While we discuss these achievers and we discuss very selective schools on CC quite often, there are so many students NOTHING like this. I'm a college counselor. I am in the middle of working on a student's case (and I should shut the CC window as it is a distraction !!) and this student is like many I have counseled who have SATs (M/CR) in the 900's or this one actually hit 1000, and GPAs of 2.8 or so. It is not so easy finding colleges though there are many out there for this kind of student. However, the students and their parents tend to have colleges on their wish list that are out of range and unrealistic. I see this a LOT. Needless to say, these kids are not overachievers. However, their college wishes, as well as their parents', are not reasonable. </p>
<p>I better get back to work!</p>