The Parent Problem- when you want to go far away...

<p>I've got my heart set on a college in or around New York City. (Not just for the location, I've heard good things about the program I'm interested in at these schools) Problem is, my parents are convinced that NYC is far too dangerous. They've also never been there and I've also never done so much as forget a homework assignment. (meaning that I'm so responsible that people laugh at me) I wish they'd open their minds to the possibility and visit, but we don't necessarily have the funds (re: They won't spend the money because they are dead set on me staying at least within three hours of home) How can I talk them into at least giving my dream schools fair chances?</p>

<p>I've lived in NYC my entire life so I can shed some light. First, what state/city are you from? NY might be a culture shock for you because in the city, you are completely dependent upon yourself. The city is extremely safe nowadays especially with increased police presence. It was only dangerous back in the 70s. You can basically walk around at 2AM and not get mugged since there are always people out and about. But obviously, don't go into a dark alley alone carrying $5,000 on you lol.</p>

<p>No one will hold your hand in NYC. Everyone is extremely independent, though they're friendly if you need directions lol. I stress this point because if you're accustomed to having people drive you everwhere or tell where to go etc., then maybe your parents are expressing some form of legitimate concern.</p>

<p>My best advice to get them to let you go to college in NYC is obviously to visit. But if money is an option, then lie your ass off. If they're anything like my immigrant parents lol they'lle belive everything I tell them. Just tell your parents that the campus you'll be staying on does not allow you to leave it. Therefore, you're enclosed in the campus and monitored by faculty and have all your needs met. Of course this is a last resort, but hey, just my 2 cents.</p>

<p>I'm not from NYC, but I did recently visit. If you're independent, I don't think it's a horrible idea, but don't walk alone in dark alleyways. If you can't handle the fact that not everything is a joy ride... unlike the students on my trip that screamed when the subway started moving and took pictures of it... I think it would be different but you could handle it. Of course, if you're from a little tiny town in the middle of nowhere, perhaps NYC isn't the best place to go... try a smaller city. Some of the universities in NYC don't have real campuses, which is different than what some people envision college being like.</p>

<p>On the other hand, my viola teacher has lived in NYC for at least 20 years and has almost been mugged three times, and I'm sure she's careful. She got away by ramming the guys with her viola case... unique lady. It isn't the safest place in the world.</p>

<p>Hey, it's a GREAT place if you use some common sense (as you should anywhere, not just big cities). I tutor in East Harlem and I have never had a problem.</p>

<p>I've worked in NYC for the past 6 years and I wouldn't want to work anyplace else. Although I can't say I'd live in NYC ($$$). But it's fun working in the City.</p>

<p>NYC? Not safe? Don't worry.</p>

<p>I grew up in New York and have never once encountered anything dangerous.
It's the best city in the US, I like to think - filled with cultural opportunity and a wonderful atmosphere.</p>

<p>::NY pride::</p>

<p>Just to reiterate .... NYC, espcally the area around NYU (i think its close to Astor Place no? but in any case ...) is relatively safe. I mean, really, that in all places you go excercising common sense is an absolute. Take University of Pennslyvania, ... pretty much all the Ivyes (espcially Yale, Columbia) ... are all isolated from its adjacent surroundings as they are enswamped by ruined cities and ghettos with people that ... well, not to speak negatively ... any teenager really would not want to interact with for safety reasons.</p>

<p>You just have to excercise good judgement. You shouldnt be on the streets at 2am or past midnight for that matter despite the occasion. In daylight, if you use the accessible sidewalks, no one (with a sane mind) is going to attempt to hurt or "mug" you in broad daylight with hundreds of people watching espically with police patrolling the blocks. Though there probably are few exceptions, people without "sane" minds are spreadout throughout the city are mostly concentrated in areas of poverty (i.e. alleys where people sleep on the ground or near steps with the stereotypical garbage cans that they use for heat/light at night)</p>

<p>BUT ALAS ... You, with your common wisdom, will avoid these areas ! Also, dont do something stupid like date a guy/girl (w/e sexuality you are) who doesnt go to school with you and lives in the surrounding ghetto or neighboorhood. The "#1" thing to keep in mind is that the people who may live near the college, or even in NYC, have different lives. They maybe people who grew up in poverty and are willing to steal things without hesitation or guilt or even kill (an extreme).</p>

<p>A girl that went to Hopkins was murdered by her boyfriend (who was a different ethnicity and completely different person) who did not attend the school and resided in a neighboring ghetto (downtown Baltimore has the highest rate of crime/murder i think at least in the NE coast) <-- This is a true story, I saw it in the campus newspaper when I visited.<br>
DONT BE LIKE THAT PERSON !!! EXCERCISE GOOD JUDGEMENT !!! DONT DO STUPID THINGS !!!</p>

<p>I think that convincing and trying to earn the trust of your parents in that you are a responsible adult who is able to independently make SOUND decisions and not some "sheltered" child, is the best course of action.</p>