<p>With all the attention focused on the achievement of our children in this forum, I thought I'd bring up an OpEd piece that appeared today in our local paper (although I took the link below from a news service site) to remind us as parents of high achieving kids that their focus on success does not shield them from other problems and in fact may be causing some of the problems we see at boarding school.</p>
<p>After reading the article, it makes me very interested in acquiring the book mentioned.</p>
<p>From time to time, I try to remind goaliegirl that rich people have problems as well as poor people. The difference is that rich people can afford more exotic ones.</p>
<p>Here is the link for those of you interested. And if drnancie is watching, I'd be particularly interested in her take on this.</p>
<p>The "support" vs. "intrusion" dichotomy is helpful. My impression, however, is that "intrusion" is much more present in the lives of high school students living at home. There is no practical way for a boarding school parent to interfere in their child's life as there is for parents with a teen at home. Just think athletics and academics for many local examples of parental interference. This is, in fact, a very strong argument in favor of boarding school in order to permit our children to be children.</p>
<p>Interestingly, it has been my observation in my work with children/teens that many more of the affluent patients in my practice are on multiple psychiatric medications and are having stress related illnesses. Those less well off face other challenges, but I had been puzzled by why these kids who on the surface seem to have so much are so stressed out and unhappy.</p>
<p>I recall once saying to a mother whose teenage daughter was having severe abdominal pains with no detectable organic cause (after thousands of dollars worth of medical evaluation) that perhaps she should consider having her move out of 1 or 2 or her honors classes---the mother's response was "I can't do that! She will never get into a good college!" Yet this young girl was losing weight, missing school and was clinically depressed</p>
<p>"Poor little rich kid" stories have always sold well. </p>
<p>The US has many more affluent families than ever before, and the pharmaceutical industry has many more psychiatric medications than ever before. So, the daughter of a stockbroker (for example) is a bit introverted and dreamy. Is she a normal child, going through a normal adolescence, or does she have a Diagnosis? And if the parents take their child shopping for a Diagnosis to improve performance, isn't the message, "you aren't o.k. as you are?" How do you get back to unconditional love from that point?</p>