<p>I know I won't get into Hotchkiss. I kinda just applied to say I did. Whatever.</p>
<p>Kent and Pomfret I have a really good feeling about</p>
<p>Westminster and Taft, I just really don't know.</p>
<p>The problem is that out of all of these five schools, the one that I really want to go to the most is the least prestigious (Pomfret) of the group. </p>
<p>I'm almost hoping that I don't get into Taft, because if I do, I would have to go, right? It's very prestigious, 10 school, etc. But the thing is, I want to go to school in the middle of nowhere (Pomfret) and not in the "city" like Taft, which is in a town of 20,000. I consider 20,000 people to be a fairly large town, and it's like 5 mins from Waterbury, which is frankly not a nice place to be near (sorry if I offended anyone). </p>
<p>I just don't know what to do. My brain is fighting with my heart.</p>
<p>first of all, you don't need to go to a prestigious school just because it is prestigious. If you don't like it, then you don't like it. It's that simple. People don't understand that in order to make it somewhere in life, you don't need to go to the best of the best. Obviously if you want to, and you would be happy there, thats a different story, it would be great to go. But if you don't want to go, then don't go, life will go on. </p>
<p>Now, my second point. a "city"?? unless you call 30 antique stores a city. (I counted on my way up, it was pretty close to 30 within 10 miles). Also, I visited a friend after my interview (about 15 mins away from the school) and it was far from congested.</p>
<p>Last but not least: Obviously the ten schools are pretty prestigious, but they are not all HADES and not all the HADES are in the 10 schools. Pretty much, the 10 schools is just a bunch of schools that said "a lot of people apply each of these schools, how about we make it easy on them and come up with common teacher recommendation forms."</p>
<p>...yes all of HADES is in TSAO. Although that doesn't mean that every school in TSAO is prestigious. I dodn't think theres that much of a difference between taft and pomfret</p>
<p>perhaps you should wait until you find out if you got accepted or not? it's alot of unwanted/un-needed stress, soo .. & yeah, i agree with mpicz, i don't think there's a HUGE difference in prestige between pomfret & taft..</p>
<p>What do you mean, you "have" to go? Of course you don't. Why would you even care about how prestigious it is anyway? It's all about which one you like the best, the one that you feel best about. You're going to be spending four years of your life there, so why care about how prestigious it is?</p>
<p>Anyway, wait until you get in. Then you can try and figure out all of this.</p>
<p>to all of the posters here, we're not all goody goody and flawless and pure and innocent and etc. a lot of us keep prestige in mind, which is, in my opinion, not very superficial because it gives a general idea of how successful and academically/athletically/artistically/whateverlly developed the school is. if you heard about julliard as a great music school, which equates to a measure of prestige and fame, are you supposed to not apply simply because that's all you heard about (and yet you really love music and want to major in it?)
if you heard that sps has great academics, and let's say you REALLY REALLY genuinely from the heart absolutely love learning. and let's say you got accepted. then again you got accepted to, mm, i dunno, a lesser known school like kent. sps seems to have so many opportunities for you, but it's so overwhelming that it is almost intimidating to you. whereas kent feels a bit more like a school, with more things that you can relate to and a substantial amount of opportunities that feels good enough for you.</p>
<p>most people don't like to submerse themselves in places that intimidate them, but if that same place contains all of the things that they want and consequently need, then it's difficult to decide whether to go or not. whereas lesser known schools have an appeal to them that says, "this fits into the measures of normal students, you'll have ample opportunity and ample academics, but it may not stand to the breadth/caliber of schools that have had more money -because honestly, money is what keeps the courses and teachers coming in- to dedicate to it. you might just miss out on a few things that you would find in a more famous, and consequently better endowed, school."</p>
<p>hopefully that made sense. im not trying to bash anyone, just trying to explain that prestige gives a two-fold impression on many students.</p>
<p>anyways. in the case you are accepted to taft and pomfret, look at their websites again. look at all the courses, all the sports, everything that will be a part of your life in six months. compare them. which one do you like better? which one sems like it will have a great <em>positive</em> influence on your life?</p>
<p>bs_hopeful....don't sweat this decision yet. See where you are admitted; go back for revisit days to YOUR top couple of choices. Often that experience strongly influences your final pick. </p>
<p>I'm a parent so this may sound easier for me to say, but don't let other people tell you who you are. So much unhappiness lies down that path. You'd be shocked by the number of adults who let money tell them who they are, or power, or prejudice, or admission to clubs (or boarding schools - prestige) etc. That's why magazines that feature top ten lists sell so well. People actually feel better about themselves when they're included on SOMEBODY ELSE'S LIST. Many kids who come to this site are obsessed with admittance to a HADES school, but far fewer offer serious, well thought out arguments about why it’s best for them. Usually, they sound like they’re regurgitating guide books, top ten lists and the voices of others.</p>
<p>It is refreshing to read your original post. It shows that you’re caring about the right things and not willing to be knee-jerk about your choice. Boarding school is a big decision for a kid your age and you should be able to answer, "because I liked this place the best," when asked why you made your choice.</p>
<p>This is an excellent response to bs hopeful. You know, sometimes, it is the parents that really need to read threads like bs hopefuls. Sometimes we are the ones who get caught up in the idea of something.</p>
<p>Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didnt (this isnt mine, but it is a good line). Get to the 10th and then work from there I think this is advice I am really giving to myself!</p>
<p>Prestige plays a role... My coach's decision to attend Exeter was 100% prestige based(His mom made him pick it over two smaller schools, he got full rides to all of them).
My dad has told me that if I get accepted into any Phillips academies than I must pick one of those. I DID HAVE A REALLY GOOD FEELING ABOUT THOSE TWO. I honestly felt like Exeter and Andover are completely tied(NOT EQUAL IN EVERY ASPECT, but collectively.)</p>
<p>I went to a boarding school meeting in my city. One alumni only went a year(Senior) and said that she got her first job at Goldman Sachs after two unsuccessful attempts because she put alumni of XXX school at the bottom of her resume on the last time.
According to her: The sole reason that she was hired was her attendance to that particular HADES school.</p>
<p>My grandfather wants me to attend Exeter so I can study more Italian(I can't write Italian above a 2nd grade level).</p>
<p>Italian border do you mind telling us which school that lady went to ... this information could be useful. Could you also tell us which school you gay tour guide went to over A/E because it was more accepting etc some people might be interested in these things.</p>
<p>I like what Westcoast has said in this thread about Prestige or not to Prestige.</p>
<p>I might add, the five schools (3 HADES) my son is apping to have passed muster with me because the alumni from those schools I have known over the past 40+ years have been most impressive and I have liked them personally. It might be interesting to start a thread on CC about the overall integrity of Prep Schools alumni twenty years out from graduation (re:Wall Street, Investment Banking, etc.), though there could be liability issues, it might help some of us see through the smoke-and-mirrors of admissions into the core values of these institutions. As a parent I am most interested in what the current Headmaster and Board is all about, the integrity of the students, and the reputations of its alumnus years from graduation. One can take for granted that the academics are rigorous.
"It takes 20 years to build a reputation and 20 seconds to blow it." - WB</p>
<p>bs_hopeful, you are agonizing over a choice you don't face yet. On March 11th, or 12th, you will know much more. In the meantime, you are only raising your own stress level. Wait. Attend revisit days for all schools, even those you think you don't like. Then decide.</p>
<p>In the meantime, in February, write a letter to Pomfret. Explain that it is your favorite school. If there really is a "Tufts Effect," such a letter can go a long way towards avoiding a rejection or wait-listing.</p>
<p>You don't "have" to go to any school, even the most prestigious. Every year, parents share stories of kids who turned down Harvard for small liberal arts colleges, for example. It's a matter of knowing where you will be happiest, not shooting for the most exalted name.</p>
<p>I think the prestige factor plays out differently in families where boarding school is a new concept. We do not live in the northeast, no family member has ever attended an American boarding school and boarding schools were not on our radar, until d received a recruiting letter from Exeter or Andover, I can't remember which, last January. It arrived at a time when my d was unhappy with her school. So the search began. When we started looking at schools, prestige was not even a factor. It really was about how much we liked the schools websites, academic offerings, the facilities, administrators that we met and the "gut" reaction we got on the campuses. </p>
<p>Now after I found cc, I became a lot more aware of the prestige factor and sometimes I think it would be better if daughter attended a well know and very prestigious school. But then I think, will it really help her get into a better college? Will it improve her experience at boarding school? Boarding school, any boarding school in my opinion, is an elite experience, so does going to one v. another, really matter. Particularly if you are coming from a public school where just about any boarding school is an improvement. </p>
<p>But d is not greatly influenced by cc and her top three schools includes only one of the HADES ( I never thought I would use that acronym) schools and she absolutely disliked a couple of the HADES schools she visited. I like that she is able to look at the schools primarily objectively and based on her own subjective feelings about the school and is not desperate to get into a school just because it is the most "prestigious". She is very...self-possessed, so she is not easily influenced by others opinions. But at the end of the day, you had better be happy with your choice. You get to choose your family for the next four years, so choose wisely.</p>
<p>I actually just got a PM from someone who read my response to italians post and she pretty much said Exeter has carried here further than her ivy league college. As much as no one wants to admit it, name plays a factor in getting a job. Prestige shouldn't be the only factor, but I read that and it hasn't changed my opinion at all.</p>
<p>If I get into all my schools...I'll still find it hard choosing between St.Pauls and Exeter. Even thought I liked St. Pauls more...it just seems like a 1-2 hours at a school shouldn't blind you from the fact that you may have just simply got a bad tour guide or something. I'll go to revisit days and everything, but if both schoola are offer FA and stuff and there's not to much of a difference....prestige could easily push the decision one way or another. It's just how it is for a lot of people. And it doesn't help that name and prestige got my mom pretty far, so she's gunna go for the A/E and not understand that SPS and Deerfield are prestigious also.</p>
<p>I hate to admit it but it's nice seeing the college I attended on the gotta get in list- Smith College. It has opened some doors for me. I think in some cases it got me the job despite a less than stellar resume. They see that name and assume you're smart. Maybe I would have been offered the jobs anyway. All I know is they always comment on it during the interview. More so than where I received my professional degree from- George Washington which is still a good school. However, nowhere on my resume does it list where I attended high school... so I would put forth that as long as the colleges you are applying to know about your high school that's all that counts and they are equally prestigious.</p>
<p>I want my son to attend the school where he'll be happiest. His favorite is an amazing place and we're holding our collective breath for a 3/10 acceptance. We're not sure where it ranks in others minds in term of prestige; neither do we care.</p>