<p>I would second not to put things away for kid–kid may not be able to find them. We just hauled everything up & then let S take charge. Same with D. We really didn’t want the kid not to be able to find important things until the end of the year when it was time to haul them off for storage.</p>
<p>Also agree that less is more–do NOT overpack of you’ll just end up hauling everything back home again.</p>
<p>As my daughter’s roommate’s mother did last year:
Do NOT complain about the size of the room or demand that your child get the bottom bunk .</p>
<p>Even if you insist on arranging the room - don’t be offended if the roommates rearrange it within the week.</p>
<p>If you child is moving into an older dorm resist to be horrified by the “condition” of the dorm. Open the window, stick in the fan and smile. The more horrified your child looks (by losing central air and sharing a community bathroom) the perkier you get.</p>
<p>
my daughter had that. two weeks ago her bf of two years announced that he “doesn’t help people move” and won’t help her move. A week later they broke up. Maybe next year.</p>
<p>someone in an earlier threat suggested making the bed, and before putting on the fitted sheet putting an envelope with a $20 inside on top of the mattress…with a note on the envelope reading “we love you…and we’re glad to see you’re changing your sheets!”</p>
<p>I thought this was brilliant.</p>
<p>Another tip: let your child be your guide and accept that they might not act as you’d expect. I am pretty introverted and not good at small talk/eye contact with new people, but I was thrilled to meet my new classmates and couldn’t wait for my parents to go home (7 years later, I realize I could’ve been nicer about expressing that!). My sister is a total extrovert whose favorite subjects in school were always recess and lunch. She broke into tears when my parents drove her onto campus, and I think they ended up staying longer than expected and having dinner with her in her dorm. We both ended up loving our respective colleges, so also don’t take their first hours on campus as any indication of how things will go over the next few years.</p>
<p>A lot of the smaller colleges will have either a convocation or some kind of parent “reception” late on move in day. It’s really nice, the College President usually speaks and gives the 'rents a pep talk. Sometimes there is a picnic afterward.<br>
Go and when that is over don’t go back to the dorm. That is your cue to skedaddle. If you need to stay in a hotel then drive a couple of hours away and then stop. Get out of town!</p>
<p>Ladies–this thread was about hints for the DADS!</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Sorry 07DAD, thought that was all covered.</p>
<ol>
<li>Tools</li>
<li>Ducttape</li>
<li>Bar down the street</li>
</ol>
<p>Anything else?</p>
<p>GA2012MOM–lol, that’s exactly why I suggested to dads that they be the parent to take the child.</p>
<p>Don’t wear the shorts and broke down sandals you wear to clean the garage, let your wife pick your outfit.</p>
<p>Spend your time hooking up internet/video game system/stereo/TV and before you know it mom’s got the bed made, clothes hung, pencils in the drawer, lamp in the corner, fan in the window…piece of cake.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>07DAD - one addition to this:</p>
<p>5A - If you think your absence may be noticed, be sure to carry around something “manly” at all times (tools, duct tape) and mumble like “gotta get sumthin’ from the car…” before you disappear. Be sure to return with another Starbucks for the W. ;)</p>
<p>scanmom–It was interesting to see how the mom-dad dynamic worked at my S’s move-in back in 2007.</p>
<p>Many seemed to be working as a team. I did notice one couple get into it when the husband tried to calm the mom who was “going off” over how “impossibly horrible” her kid’s room was. Later, I saw their daughter sitting alone outside the dorm softly crying. I had to walk past her dorm room to get to my S’s room. The mom was in there alone huffing and the dad was no place to be seen.</p>
<p>There was a all freshman “family” outside buffet late that afternoon with large tables set up under a huge tent. I did see the girl (smiling) and her dad sharing a table with 3 other student-family units, but no mom to be seen for the hour the meal lasted. </p>
<p>A parental move-in meltdown has to be a student’s worst nightmare. To start their new life out with a public humiliation has to bite.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Thank goodness for on-line photographs…because I do think Son’s room is impossibly horrible, but I’ve been able to deal with it alone and try to find solutions. (It is so awkwardly designed that it would be horrible even if new.)</p>
<p>
Dad - if Mom starts this then escort her to Starbucks. just the two of you. tell her she and kid need a break. Get her out of there. </p>
<p>NO PARENTAL MELTDOWNS ALLOWED!!! </p>
<p>(sorry for hijacking the thread earlier)</p>
<p>This is great!!! H saw all the full tubs in his office the other day (no floor space to be found) and freaked. Then I showed him the Ziploc totes that contents of tubs are going into and he calmed down.</p>
<p>If you have a wheeled moving dolly though - BRING IT</p>
<p>PS - the five page “pearls of wisdom” manifesto (with the check attached) will be in D’s college mailbox two days after we leave. Anything said during ride there or room setup will just go in one ear and out the other…</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>THAT is a great win-win solution. A parent and student might also drop by the dorm late the afternoon before the morning move-in. The RA’s were there and we got to take an actual “peek.” Also, they were able to give S some real world suggestions of what to do about the lack of lights and the need for fans, fans, fans! (the reality of no AC at his school)</p>
<p>BTW–in my experience with 2 different dorm buildings in S’s 2 years in the dorms, dorm rooms can be REALLY HORRIBLE. The great equalizer is that ALL the dorm rooms are the pits so that is something the kids have in common. </p>
<p>There was only 1 room freshman year that I saw where the parents of the 2 girl students had “fixed” everything–screens to mask the institutional "yuk "wall colors, a near wall-to-wall carpet remnant, matching bedspreads</p>
<p>
True. But if you put things away, there will be at least one person who knows where they are… ;)</p>
<p>If I melt-down, I am going for something stronger back at the motel. </p>
<p>Seriously I am concerned, I havent told D her room is next to bathroom. Hopefully she wont mind.</p>
<p>nngmm – so I wont be the only one who gets a call, heah mom, where’ld you put x, y z. Actually these may be the only calls I get.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Been there, done that. I secretly hoped that my S would be known as the “guy with the tools” that all the girls in the dorm would come to for help. Not sure how that worked out for him…</p>
<p>Guess I’m the bad Mom - I probably did say out loud that DD’s freshman room was REAL small, especially compared to my frosh room back in the day. By Xmas we had a lot to say about it because it was the smallest room at any college we visited. On the up side, her eventual best friend, who lived down the hall freshman year, had an even smaller double.</p>
<p>My meltdown was sophomore year, when I flew up to help with the move-in - that was the closest I ever came to stomping down to administration and demanding attention - I didn’t care if she moved or not, I wanted my money back! I needed it so that when she got some dreadful disease from the filthy carpet (who in their right mind would put carpet in a dorm room??? especially one typically used by boys - I swear there was ground-in barf, nothing else could look like that) I could pay her medical bills. OR when she or her roommates got murdered because you could crawl into the window from the street… But no, I saved my righteous indignation for the car, and bought them a rug to cover the barfy spots.</p>
<p>A small tool kit is our standard HS graduation party present.</p>