I currently live at home with my mom, stepdad, and little sister. I’m 21 years old and she’s 6 years old - huge age difference lol… I’ve been wanting to dorm for college since I was 17!! Literally since senior year of high school. I wasn’t able to start college right after graduating because of financial reasons with my hs… 2 years later and I ended up finally going to community college! Anyway, during the time that I wasn’t in college I helped my mom out alot (step dad was not helping out at all) when my sister started prek i picked and dropped her off at school everyday with no pay, when she started kindergarten thats when I started college so I only picked/dropped her up 4 days out of the week, still with no pay. I even had to help with her hw sometimes… my mom is a very over protective, strict mother, she makes me literally be her mom… she doesn’t really do anything for her besides feed her, clothe her, post her all over instagram/fb, and pay for her school tuition. I sometimes even have to bathe her. My mom and my stepdad argue literally every day, Im sick and tired of it, I don’t know how I have a 3.2 gpa with all the arguing that happens in my house. Last year my mom got so upset with my step dad that she took her anger ness out on me and pushed me so hard I fell on these crates we have in my room and hit my ribs (mind you i’m very skinny only 85 pounds), during the summer she hit a glass cup at my mouth and chipped my tooth. I love my mom but I’m tired of her taking her anger out on me… She does my schedule for school because I have to work around my sisters time frame. Now that she has started 1st grade and I’m a “sophomore” at my CC I get to start applying to colleges this summer because I plan to enroll in my 4 yr university spring 2019… I feel really bad leaving my sister with her, I mean I know shes my mom and she will try her best to deal with her, but its that I feel bad leaving her with the type of way my mom is… she won’t do anything for her, I’m pretty sure she will get a nanny or babysitter to deal with her because she has become so lazy… so should I stick it out and live at home for 2 more years or dorm so I can be a little stress free?
@julyzahxo I think you need leave home
I think you need to leave home, if it is for your sister, there will always be a reason to be there, you need to go to meet your goals and not continue doing the task to your mom and stepfather.
Aside from that the gratefulness for your collaboration is hurting you.
Good Luck
@“International Dad” thanks for that… I know I have to leave, sometimes i just second guess myself if i should or not.
@julyzahxo I agree with the above. It is time for you to leave and dorm away at college. You need some distance from your situation. You also need to begin to start your life which includes getting your degree.
Thanks @pkchamp89
Dormimg with a bunch of 18 year olds probably won’t be as much fun as you think it is. An off campus apartment might make more sense. But I agree you should move out.
@intparent but by the time I move in I’m considered a junior so why would I be with 18 years old, I would be a upperclassmen with all the 20-21 years old (by that time I’ll be 22 my bday is in August) the 18 yr olds are considered lowerclassmen
At many colleges, students don’t dorm after freshman or sophomore year. Some small LACs require it, but most schools don’t. Many colleges don’t have room for everyone to dorm even if they want to. They often guarantee frosh dorm space, but no one else.
“To dorm or not to dorm” really means just moving away from home for college. That will most likely be an apartment with people close to OP’s age.
OP, even if you stick around at home through the rest of your college life, it doesn’t really change anything for your sister. When you’re through in a couple of years and really ready to get the heck out of there, she will still be there and can go nowhere else (unless home life gets worse and mom’s anger takes an even more violent turn than it has up to this point - then we would be having an entirely different conversation). But don’t paint yourself as the only person who can take care of your little sister; even a caring nanny or babysitter can be a buffer between her and a mother who throws things and pushes people when she’s frustrated.
You should get out now while you can, so that you can finish your education and get a good job to support yourself. You may also be in a better position to help your sister longer term. Yes, you will worry about her when you are gone. Keep in contact and visit when you can. Maybe mom will step up when her built-in babysitter flies the coop.