I’m not really looking so much for advice here…but if you have any…I will take it.
I’m back on College Confidential after a year of college. I’m a rising sophmore right now. (Luckily, I came in with credits so I am still considered sophmore status for next year.)
This past semester was the absolute worst period of time in terms of health. I was EXTREMELY sick and basically ended up missing 2 months of classes, which generated a lot of catch-up. To make matters worse, an extremely distressing event happened that affected me for a few weeks. Fortunately, I am in better health now and am hoping to use the summer to recuperate fully.
My parents knew about the amount of work I had and were strongly against me pursuing a medical withdrawal or any sort of leave of temporary absence. They were mainly against this because they 1) were worried about me falling behind, 2) they think that no matter what happens I can always finish schoolwork, and 3) my scholarships would be in jeopardy. The scholarships aren’t super important for my family considering we have the capability to pay for my education. I do not have Financial Aid and we pay only for dorming with my current scholarships.
I was hoping to pursue incompletes in some courses since I was assured of getting A’s in two of my courses…but one of my professors refused to cooperate and basically said I did not communicate enough or make enough of an effort for her to warrant an incomplete. I understand her position and agreed.
So my only option was to take a medical withdrawal in all my courses or risk getting F’s in some courses. I obviously took the medical withdrawal because I would have more of a case of appealing for my scholarships back by doing that. The withdrawal will only show up on my transcript and not affect my GPA. I will also be retaking the courses next semester (Fall 2018) and have the grade replaced afterwards. Still, I was kinda a lil upset since I did put in so much effort to at least catch up somewhat in two courses…and normally I am a student that would have done well in all of my classes had I not been ill…The first semester here, I had a 3.9 GPA and I am in the Honors College at my school.
Right now, my parents do not know that I took a medical withdrawal…and I do know that I will have to tell them. They’re going to be extremely upset…I’m hoping to lessen the blow by finding some way to scramble together enough money from external scholarships to come close to what I had with my college scholarships.
I guess I’m more so looking for advice on how to break the news to my parents and the likely chance of me obtaining around 8k in external scholarships (this is for one semester). I’m thinking i should have a reasonable chance if I apply to around 20-30ish small scholarships in the summer.
I guess what concerns me is: “They were mainly against this because…3) my scholarships would be in jeopardy” and your feeling that, “The scholarships aren’t super important for my family considering we have the capability to pay for my education.” Do you see this conflict? They care. You dont seem to. Its their money. If we were only paying for room/board and one of our kids sprang this on us, we’d be more than upset.
That’s not to scold you but to point out a disconnect in the thinking.
Imo, you need to screw up your courage and inform them asap. Just do it.
Chances you’ll make up for any lost scholarship with externals are slim. It’s May 12. Most externals are small.
@lookingforward I mean…I guess I should have clarified. Obviously they care. It’s just that they are paying way less than what they did for my older sister for school because of my scholarships and they, themselves, did not make a huge factor in costs of attending a school when we were deliberating on where I would attend college. They were mainly focused on opportunities and level of education. Also, we weren’t paying just for room/board the first semester. I got an additional scholarship which brought costs down in the spring semester.
I’m not saying you are wrong. You’re completely right. I know they’re going to be VERY angry and upset when I tell them…but given the circumstances, they’ll probably agree with what I did. They would have had a heart attack if I got a F instead.
Chances may be slim for external scholarships, but I think I can at least get 1-3k…Maybe I’m being optimistic, but nothing hurts in trying. I’ve kinda already did my search and there’s still quite a few really random, small stuff out there.
Will you be able to get your scholarships back? If so, how long will it take? If you get a job this summer you can probably earn $3k. Are you already working to help defray costs?
Glad you are on the mend from your illness and trauma. Tell your parents, there’s no way around it. Try for scholarships, but know you need your parents for a back up or you won’t be able to afford to go back. You could also submit the FAFSA and get a 6500 dollar unsubsidized loan.
You need to tell them now. You SHOULD have told them right when you did it. It just will get harder as you go along.
Money is money. Even parents with financial resources don’t enjoy learning they have to shell out more than they anticipated or feel that they need to. I’m sorry you had health issues and there are legitimate reasons for needing time off or withdrawing. However, depending on how it is handled, sometimes there are ways of getting some of the semester’s expenditures back at that time. That boat has sailed now and since you chose not to discuss it with your folks when you made the decision to withdraw, you took that potential option away from them as the people that are funding your education.
If you were my kid, that would tick me off in addition to not being honest and forthcoming from the get go. I’d also want to know what you were doing between the time you decided to withdraw for the semester and now, and the implications since at many colleges their are stipulations to return from a medical leave.
Waiting to tell them will only make things worse the longer it goes on. You need to tell them ASAP. Don’t wait and dig a deeper hole for yourself.
It’s mid May. What are your plans for the summer? Have you found a paying job?
So I thought I’d give an update now that everything fully worked out.
@doschicos
When I withdrew, it was the very last day of the semester- I had already been taking some Finals and trying to catch up overall. Some classes I expected to get an A in even. So I wasn’t just wasting time in between when I withdrew and when I posted this.
I fessed up and told my parents. Of course they were very angry and upset.
But, later on in May, I applied for additional scholarships through my Honors College and my appeal for my current scholarships was processed- the school’s financial aid didn’t give me clear information when I made this post. I was under the impression that I would lose all aid while on probation if my appeal was accepted, but that was not the case.
My appeals were accepted and my old scholarships reinstated. I also received additional scholarships from applying. These scholarships are valid for the remaining of my time at school…so now I am barely paying for college (roughly a few hundred). My parents were of course very happy about that, but still very upset about the withdrawal. I understood that and we have talked about the situation together- they are now on the same page as me.
Currently, I am taking the max credit load I can take without overloading. This semester, I’m retaking 3 of the courses from last semester and taking 3 new classes. I am doing well in all of them! We’ve hit midterms time period and so far I’ve been getting A’s in all of my exams. I’m set on track to still graduate within four years too!
OP, let me just say that I think you are a very mature and thoughtful student. You knew what you were capable of handling, and you made the best decision for your health despite knowing that your parents would be angry (perhaps unjustifiably so: yes, the money is a lot, but your health is way more important). And you did the necessary footwork to get your scholarships back together!
Thank you for coming back and giving an update. I applaud you for taking the necessary steps to maintain your health and finish your schoolwork when you were ready. Congrats on doing really well, too!