<p>My parents are going through a divorce. My father is very wealthy while my mom doesn't have any income, can't drive or speak English. My mother urges me to be in her custody so it will give me several advantages:</p>
<p>-Apply for financial aid </p>
<p>-First generation to go to college? (My dad went to college but my mother didn't so does it count?)</p>
<p>-The difficulties I faced during the divorce will enhance my chances.</p>
<p>-If I kill someone while driving, my dad doesn't have to pay millions.</p>
<p>But now the question is, should I really say yes? My parents prob won't divorce so soon if I said no and as a result, they may not even divorce at all! To be honest, I don't even care that much about colleges anyways since I pretty much ruined my chances of getting into a top college with my abysmal GPA. But then again, my parents are still together for me and are definately not happy living together so should I use this excuse to stop them from going through this pain any furthr? I don't really know where to share this with and as CC is such a mature forum, I may as well write it here and ask for some opinions and advices.</p>
<p>When it comes to financial aid, colleges will not let your dad off the hook. He will be expected to contribute whether you are living with him or not, and his income will be considered.
You need to evaluate your college goals outside of the divorce situation. What are you hoping to get out of college? What do YOU need to do to make it happen - regardless of what your parents decide. Try to separate your future from the future of your parents marriage. It's hard, but necessary for your growth and independence.
It's unfortunate that you are in this position, but many young people are in similar positions all over the country. Divorce isn't really considered a hardship anymore, especially if a parent is wealthy.
Pick your custodian based on the healthiest outcome, not on where you think it will be the most advantageous from a college standpoint.</p>
<p>This seems a bit weird. I thought my mother would have the sole responsibility for my well being so isn't it by law that only she is my legal guardian?</p>
<p>it is not possible to separate both issues. My mom is waiting for my answer to make her decision. Yes, it seems a bit weird but most Asians put their priority and perhaps their enitre life dedicated to their children such as in my case. I am trying to avoid facing them these few days but I can't evade them for 9 more monthes.</p>
<p>Well I don't really mind if my parents dvorce or not as long as they are happy. But how can I encourage them to do so when my parents has stayed together so many years for me? If I tell them now, won't they think their efforts were wasted? </p>
<p>74% of all amercians have divorced at some point but it is unfair to say that it is no longer a hardship because each case is different. I know many people (well, mainly chinese. perhaps other races are different?) who take this way more seriously than I do. If I share with them my attitude towards my parent's divorce, they would actually think I don't care about my parents at all. But I assumed you said its not considered a hardship from adcom's point of view, right?</p>
<p>There shouldn't really be anyone to choose because I am 16 already and is off to college in around 8 month. I don't think income plays a factor either because my mom will get half of my dad's properties anyways. Besides, choosing one over another seems cruel to me.</p>
<p>Are you saying that your mom is waiting to see if you will live with her before she agrees to a divorce? You need to tell your mom that this needs to be a decision she makes for herself, because you will only be around (permenently) for a few more months.</p>
<p>You shouldn't have to choose one over the other. Your living arrangements should be something that you all agree with. Maybe the majority of the time you would live with one, and schedule visiting (vacation, etc.) with the other. They are both your parents, regardless of whether they are married to each other. </p>
<p>The court (lawyers) will help your parents sort out the financial arrangements for your mom's support, and yours as well. Your father is legally obligated to support you - whether he is married to your mom or not. He's your dad, and will always be your dad. This isn't your concern, however. This is the adult's concern. </p>
<p>Do you have someone you could talk with - a counselor or family friend to help you sort out some of the feelings and confusion that you must be experiencing? I think talking to another adult would help you separate a bit from the triangle you find yourself in. Their relationship is not YOUR responsibilty, in any way. You have to realize that.</p>