Fair enough.
Not sure what precisely that means, to attempt to answer the question.
Judging from my daughter’s friends and roommates I met, everyone seemed quite comfortable in their skin - from queer to strictly observing Jewish - and everything in-between. Never heard anything that it mattered to anyone. Some might be out-in-your-face/activist personalities - other’s might be equally happy to just “be”.
So many nice replies! I do follow Erininthemorn. Her coverage is both scary and helpful.
About Barnard, I would love my kid to go to school in NYC. I did. But she thinks NYC is too big and dirty. Ok. It’s kind of dirty. Fair enough. But I also think it’s a great place for anyone LGBTQ+. I don’t know where I heard that about Barnard and Wellesley. They are the most prestigious of the women’s colleges (by rankings…I think?). So, maybe that was why. It’s entirely unscientific and just what I heard from a few people.
We can technically pay full price. We only have one kid and have been saving for a long time. My parents also did a prepaid plan for her that is a better deal in state but still will help out of state. But I always assumed my kid might do some kind of graduate school. I think whether we would pay full price would depend on the school. If she got into Brown (highly highly unlikely), we’d pay full price. But for lower ranked schools, I’m not as sure. We live in VA, and we have both UVA (she might get in but it’s still very competitive) and William and Mary (according to school counselors she’d probably get in—especially ED). So, it’s sort of hard to justify spending soooo much on some other schools. BUT I don’t think W&M or UVA are the right fits for her.
Sorry about my posting. Everyone is being so helpful. I’m in my hotel before we start our tour today, so I’m typing on my phone. 
Wow. That is shocking. Why not just let people be who they are? Sad.
My daughter really, really wanted to go to Barnard but got waitlist/reject. Their current acceptance rate is around 6.5%, for what it’s worth. Smith sent her an early write and a scholarship, so the message was clear. In retrospect, she feels it was the right choice. I don’t know if “buttoned up” would be the right term, but Barnard is more intense. That’s both about the environment and the somewhat more competitive vibe among the students. I do not for a moment mean to downgrade Barnard… but coming from the Western suburbs at 18, it could have been a lot to handle.
She is now working full time and working on a Masters part time at Columbia and feels that 23 was a better age to make that move.
And having just mentioned grad school – yes, you do want to save some money! Even with a full-time job and some tuition exemption, she eats a lot of rice and beans. It’s likely that her job will end in 2 years and she would like to go full time at school to get that degree done. Tuition is ~ $65K/yr… PhD programs are different but MS programs are a cash cow for the university, no doubt!
No. The women’s colleges are only an experiment…that’s why we’re visiting. We are mostly focused on coed schools in or near cities that are in blue states.
Thank you! Brandeis, American, and GW are all on our list. We’ve visited Brandeis and she liked it. It was her favorite of the Boston area schools. We’ve also walked around GW numerous times but have not yet officially toured GW or American.
Did someone say something nasty? Or did I? It’s always a little scary posting about this. But obviously we’re not the only ones! Thank you to the positive posters! We see Bryn Mawr today. So, I’ll report back.
If you’re referring to this statement by Lindagaf
then I think it was in reference to all the peach, orange, and russet on the map from erininthemorn of states that have the worst anti-trans laws or are at moderate to high risk within 2 years, i.e., more than half the country (27 states, I think).
Looking forward to hearing about the experience at Bryn Mawr today!
Oh. Yes. It’s pretty scary as a parent. Thank you!
Hey - with so many choices, any criteria/perception to whittle down her list are good criteria. What matters is what works for her (and what would not).
NYC is a world of its own - and if you don’t love it, then it’s simply not the right place for that person.
Agreed though some of the happiest college students I know go to Barnard (and some of unhappiest to Columbia lol).
Univ of Washington has a purple and gold scholarship for oos but not cheap and getting to be a tougher and tougher admit.
Reed does not give merit, only financial aid and it is $80k per year.
Seattle U, Univ of Portland and Willamette are schools my lesbian D is considering.
Yes, I am referring to the map.
Smith is also loan free in its financial aid packages, so all aid awarded is in the forms of grants. This is a big difference maker.
My daughter received a STRIDE scholarship last year which was 1/2 of tuition, plus $2700/semester in research stipend. Her need-based aid package (all grants) covered half of the remaining costs, making Smith more affordable than in-state tuition at our flagship university.
The verdict is….Bryn Mawr was awesome! Ok. My daughter liked it, as did the friend she went with to look. Friend’s mom and I loved it. I think it will definitely be a college she applies to. I don’t know whether we will ED anywhere or not.
First, it’s just beautiful. I’ve heard it compared to Hogwarts, and I can see why. A lot of the buildings look like castles. So much green space. Not a bad train ride out to Philly. If you had a car, it would be even quicker. Just really gothic vibes.
Second, everyone was so friendly! We actually met the new Dean coming off the train. She asked if we needed help finding where we were going, and then we found out she was the new undergraduate Dean starting in July. She was so nice and had a cool vibe.
The students were, for the most part, very funky looking. Lots of dyed hair—artsy. It’s weird because the campus looks very preppy but the students were all very unique looking.
They specifically called out being a place for gender minorities in the info session. Nice.
I talked to the school rabbi who I think functions as a counselor as well and asked her about my concerns. And she didn’t have a specific answer for me either because she said they literally don’t keep track. But I definitely felt it was a welcoming space with a lot of non binary people and people who were open to dating people outside of the binary. She was so nice. I really just got warm vibes from everyone.
I’m also curious to see Haverford and Swarthmore since it’s clear there’s a lot of overlap, especially with Haverford.
My kid liked it. I didn’t get, “Wow! This place is amazing,” but I haven’t gotten that anywhere. Her friend liked it too. I think they were both tired.
So, those were my impressions. I feel it’s a school she should definitely at least apply to. The rabbi said if she was nerdy and geeky, she’d fit right in. She mentioned D&D. Magic words. 
Lovely! Keep in mind the ED card though as you visit, always a shame not to use it so see if she does end up with a favorite.
I did. I don’t know how ED affects merit aid, though. I have a friend with a kid who applied and was accepted to a school ED that does give merit aid, and he was a very strong student and didn’t get any. And I wondered if it was because he applied ED.
This would be a great location. Not too far but far enough. Close to a big city. Very liberal. Just warm and friendly. And you basically get to live in a castle.
You can usually ask the AO about how they treat merit with ED. I’ve found most schools pretty upfront (they don’t want someone shocked or disappointed with a financial aid package who applied ED).
Another update! I’m case anyone is comparing the two schools, regardless of gender stuff.
We visited Haverford today. We liked Haverford, but my daughter and I both ultimately preferred Bryn Mawr.
The campus was pretty but not AS pretty. The students seemed very nice and smart.
I would say overall most of the students I saw (there weren’t that many probably because it’s so close to the Easter) looked a little less “alternative.” I think I’m really showing my age with that word. But it’s the best word that fits. Most of the students I saw at Bryn Mawr had a sort of quirky style. Haverford was a little more understated?
What was really missing was that sense of tradition we felt at Bryn Mawr. You could just kind of feel the difference? And there was something palpably a little different with guys on campus. We ended the tour by the gym, where there were quite a few guys working out. It’s not that there was anything bad about it. It just felt a bit more conventional.
Haverford had some very nice facilities, and I felt like more of the buildings were more updated. (Although the castle-y kind of feeling at Bryn Mawr is really cool!) The fine arts are housed there, and they had a very nice building with a makerspace we saw.
Ultimately, if you attend either of the two, it seems like you often take classes at both. So, I’m very glad we saw it. And everyone also was very friendly, and the students we talked to were clearly very intelligent and passionate about learning. I couldn’t say anything bad about the school. If anything, I guess I found it even more reassuring that the schools were sort of linked so there were more people and social opportunities. I do think maybe Haverford felt a bit more serious? But I think that feeling can be influenced by your tour guide. Our tour guide was very nice but a little more on the serious side than our guide at Bryn Mawr.
But between the two, there was something special about Bryn Mawr that is hard to put my finger on. I even asked our guide if she felt the vibes were different, and she said yes, and that she felt it had to do with the traditions and of course not being co-ed, but that she also found it hard to describe.
Tomorrow we see Swarthmore. My kid is not likely to get in (very high reach for almost anyone) and probably will not even apply. But since they are so close and you can even take classes there (although it seems like fewer students do because of the distance and space), it seems worthwhile, if just to give another comparison between these SLACs.
Thanks for all of the advice. I hope my little subjective reviews will be of some use to someone else!
Thank you for your reviews; they have been very helpful! It would be great if you wanted to share your impressions on this, thread, too: Colleges your child crossed off the list after visiting, schools that moved up on the list. Why?
I also loved Bryan Mawr, but both of my daughters were lukewarm. The food was awesome, the statue of Athena in the great hall, fireplaces in the dorms, and the traditions—
. Actually, the food did sway one D, but I digress:wink:.
I actually wanted to write to say that, being VA residents, I would think about keeping W&M on your list. My D21 is a sophomore who plays DnD every Sunday with her friends from freshman hall, belongs to the archery club, and loves her professors (history department). However, her proudest accomplishment was being crowned The Moon as part of the Celestial Court (with The Sun and The Star) at the Over the Rainbow Gala last year. She finds the LGBTQ community very warm and welcoming, and their events are definitely considered cool and are very well attended.
Feel free to message me if I could answer questions, of if your daughter would like to chat with a current student.