<p>I'm currently a second year at Grinnell and I was thinking about transferring, but I really am not sure how good my reasons are and I thought I would benefit from people who have more experience with Grinnell and college in general.</p>
<p>I'm not really sure how happy I am with Grinnell. The first thing about Grinnell that troubles me a little bit is the culture. I grew up in very conventional, middle class suburbia and that kind of culture has definitely influenced me. </p>
<p>I went to a high school where the honors section had mostly nerdy kids who happened to be athletic too. Most of these kids went on to state schools where all the guys wear polo shirts and khaki shorts and play ultimate frisbee on the quad all the time. I really watching professional sports - but I feel this has a very small following outside of the athletic teams at the college. At Grinnell, I have a very difficult time organizing a pick up game of football because everybody seems to hate playing football or seems too busy.</p>
<p>I listen to popular, mainstream music that I feel is perceived as crass, superficial stuff by most people at Grinnell. I dress in a style that you might call preppy on a campus where things like black rimmed glasses, scarves, and leggings are really common. </p>
<p>I think this bothers me because I am simply out of the comfort zone of the mainstream culture that I'm really accustomed to. I'm not ostracized by other people and I like to believe that I'm actually pretty well liked. I fit the quirky, awkward stereotype of Grinnell quite well.</p>
<p>I tell myself that it's good to accumulate new perspectives and interests rather than sticking to the same homogeneous and somewhat boring mainstream culture that I'm so used to. But I honestly don't know if I'm happy or if it matters - I say to myself that I can always go back to that culture after college because it's so prevalent anyways. Why not take the next couple years to see and experience a culture you're not used to?</p>
<p>Still, I really miss talking about things like music and sports. And it's not just me either, people are just so different that I rarely hear discussions about common interest in music, literature, or hobbies. It's definitely weird for me that I have that one or two friends on campus that I can have really in depth conversations about music or sports. But still, I've learned a lot about different parts of the country and even the world. Conversations at Grinnell certainly have that intellectual dimension that I just never had in high school. And for me, that was part of the reason why I chose Grinnell, so I can actually have some deep, intellectual conversation. </p>
<p>Although, it becomes somewhat obnoxious for me at times, even a little snobby for me. I say things like "bro" and "man" because it simply was part of my high school vernacular. I'm obviously not going to say those things in an essay, but I feel people slight my intelligence because it's part of my mannerisms. My roommate despises Harry Potter because he doesn't think it has literary merit. As a kid of that generation, I can tell you that I didn't pick it up at age nine expecting or wanting literary merit out of Harry Potter. Can people not enjoy things just for its entertainment value? I have another friend who hates popular mainstream movies and only watches bad movies because he enjoys satirizing it. I'm not sure I understand. </p>
<p>I'm just not sure if I'm as socially concerned as other kids at Grinnell either. I started out wanting to be a history major, but I'm not sure I like the limited selection typical of small colleges. The emphasis is also on social history. Yes, I agree that women and minority rights are important issues - but I still want to learn about things like military, political, and economic history. The treatment on those topics is really piecemeal. The history classes are very discussion based and you can imagine how hard it would be to steer the conversation away from anything not social history. </p>
<p>This might be an invalid concern, but I kind of wonder about how lasting my relationships at Grinnell will be. We're all spread out from different parts of the country. I always wonder what my social network would have liked if I chose to go to a state school in Illinois. I visited a friend at Illinois Wesleyan once. Everybody on his floor was from Illinois. I told his friends about the demographic at Grinnell and somebody responded that she knew "a girl from California." I guess that's why I started to appreciate the fact that I had close contact with guys from Brazil and India. </p>
<p>But still, it seems like all my high school friends need to do to see their college friends is to drive maybe forty five minutes out to X suburb of Chicago. I'd need a plane ticket to see some of my friends. Their relationships seem like they're going to be so much easier to maintain after college. </p>
<p>The other part of Grinnell that really unnerves me is the academic rigor. I sometimes wonder if this academic experience comes at the cost of the social opportunities I might have at other schools with similar academic reputations. I've just heard Grinnell has such a heavy workload - I wonder if people at other prestigious schools have time to do all their activities, homework, and sleep too! </p>
<p>My GPA is really unimpressive - it's barely a 3.0 after three semesters. Truth be told, I'm not even sure if I can transfer to anywhere competitive with that GPA. I don't have the best work ethic I'll admit, but I do all my homework (including reading) and contribute regularly in class. It's just really difficult for me. I tell my relatives about the difficulty, but they just have this perception that liberal arts colleges are inferior to big name universities to Northwestern and Notre Dame - so therefore, they can't possibly have comparable academic rigor to a school people have actually heard of.</p>
<p>The "prestige" of Grinnell really frustrates me. None of my friends know where it is and because of it, they simply dismiss it as some kind of ******** institution. My friends have slipped in jokes about how I'm going to be so unemployable after college. I entertained thoughts about being an economics major, just to do something practical (at a college where we lack professional programs like accounting or nursing), but I just really don't have the interest for it. Instead, I'm likely going to graduate as history major with an unimpressive GPA. My friends would tell me that as a liberal arts major, I could probably do go on to do law school or academia. </p>
<p>I don't want to do either. I always envisioned myself starting in a generic office job, working way up, and eventually going back to raising a family in a middle class suburb. I know it's not a very exciting dream, but I sometimes truly wonder if it will be viable with my circumstances. Why would I get hired in place of some business major from University of Illinois anyways? I'm a little skeptical about the spiel that liberal arts majors are so good at critical analysis and communicating their ideas. Is the implication then that kids from other colleges are mindless, rote memorization drones who are incapable of writing business memos? </p>
<p>I'm just scared mindlessly about my career opportunities. My parents definitely don't believe in me anymore. I really don't feel like retorting anymore when people say I'm not learning practical skills. My friends are all going into engineering or health science - there's really nothing I can tell them about why I might end up being successful. I go to a school where "success" is largely measured by how much you do for social justice. It's very noble, but I want a boring, conventional job out of college that pay the bills. I don't want to end up as the McDonalds cashier who can talk about existentialism. </p>
<p>I'm asking myself - are my career objectives and social expectations in line with Grinnell? I want to say yes and that I can adapt to all of my troubles, but I just am not sure if I'll end up saying that I regret choosing Grinnell in the first place. I apologize for the long windedness of this...but it's a really difficult and complex issue for me. Any input and feedback would be gladly appreciated.</p>