Transferring back to public school junior year

Parents Forum
1

<p>So I'm not a parent, but I don't know where to ask my question, so hopefully you guys will be willing to help me out!</p>

<p>I'm currently a HS sophomore at an all girls catholic school. I've hated my sophomore year. Last year I had my doubts, but I thought that there were enough positive things about the school that it was worth staying. It is a very respected school in the area, and the girls get in to great colleges, and everyone is super smart. However, I've lost interest in my ECs, lost respect for some of my teachers and coaches because of multiple events, and also I strongly dislike my peers at school. Everyone thinks they are so much better than everyone, everyone is pretty much dead set on going to Harvard, and the girls are just plain rude, and I hate it. The school has its up points. Maybe once a month I'll have a day that makes me go: "Well, maybe this place isn't too bad" but for the most part, I hate going to school every day.</p>

<p>My only other option is public school. In 8th grade, I wanted to go to private school more than anything. I told myself that I didn't like the people at my school (I actually started making a bunch of great friends in the spring, after I had already picked my new HS), and I thought private school would give me a better education, with smaller class sizes, and a better sense of community. No doubt is my education very good, but I don't like the competition (If you graduate with a 3.7, you'll be at the bottom third of the class.) nor the students, and the public school students are much more welcoming. I want to experience high school, with football games and dances (and boys), but I still understand it is important to learn. Another factor for me is that I want to major in voice performance and/or music education, and my current school's environment doesn't support that. The music department is unorganized, the students look down on you for making such choices, and also, come senior year and audition time, we'll be limited financially because of school tuition. </p>

<p>In public school, I would get 8 classes, which would in ways, be 3 more than I get now because right now I have 6 classes, with one of them being religion. My dad told me that in some cases, it looks better to graduate from public school anyways. I'm confident that I'll do very well at the public school. I had the conversation with my dad, and he is all for me doing whatever I want, but I haven't talked to my mom yet. What are some other things I should think about in transferring back to public school for junior and senior years? I've been thinking about it for a while, and I've researched all my options, but my dad worries that I may just have this idea because I've been having a bad week. I feel as if things are just getting worse, and today I had an experience with my school that was kind of the last straw. I fear I'll be giving up a great opportunity at my school, but I'm just not happy here.</p>

2

<p>What is your public school like? Is it competitive? Will you be placed at the right academic track? There maybe some requirements(pre-requisite classes) to allow you to take advance courses (Honors, APs, IB). Sometimes public school maybe full for some of those classes, and as a transfer you may not be able get in. </p>

<p>What about college counselling? How many students per counselor? Do they have good placement record? </p>

<p>Socially, it’s more difficult for a girl to transfer junior year. By then, most people have their clique already, as a new girl, it wouldn’t be easy.</p>

<p>My younger daughter just made the move, as a junior, to a new country and new school. She wanted to move because she was tired of her old school and friends, she wanted something new. She thought her life would be so much more interesting at a new school, and it would be a good opportunity to make new friends. The kids at her new school didn’t pay much attention to her initially because they didn’t need one more friend, but she did. It was a hard adjustment for her. We (her older sister and I) had to give her a lot of encouragement and pep talks. Long story short, 3 months later she is very happy. She now has a core group of friends inside and outside of school (through her EC). </p>

<p>Junior year is an important and hard year for most students. Academically, it is harder. It is the year when juniors are preparing for various SAT or SAT tests, and college visits. It is also the year when students are nominated or given awards for various honors/volunteer organizations. It is more likely to be nominated if the administration and teachers know who you are. Our younger daughter is making her rounds and having playing dates with her advisor and college counselor, and that’s an added work/pressure on her. At her old school, she already had a reputation and everyone knew her. As you probably are aware of, in order to get into a top school, it is important to have some leadership role in an organization. It would be harder for you to be elected if people didn’t know who you were.</p>

<p>I think you should weigh in all the pros and cons about moving junior year. In my daughter’s case, she didn’t have much of a choice because I was moving for work. At the end it was good for her (fluent in Spanish and learning another culture), but it didn’t come without a price. I would get your parents involved with your decision making, speak with your school counselor, look at the public school’s college profile, hang out with some kids from the public school and hear what they have to say.</p>

<p>Good luck.</p>

3

<p>It sounds to me like you’ve done a pretty thorough job of laying out the positives and negatives.</p>

<p>Is your public hs very competitive? As you said, a 3.7 at your current school will put you in the bottom 1/3 of your class. A friend’s daughter was a straight-A student in public middle school and went to a Catholic high school, where she graduated in the 2nd decile. Her parents hired a private college counselor who told them she might have been more competitive for college had she remained in public school, because she probably would have been at the very tippy-top of her class. (She graduated and is attending BC so all is fine, haha). On the other hand, if your high school is THAT competitive, the colleges probably know it.</p>

<p>Have you discussed the pros and cons with your parents? How do they feel about it? Are they really committed to this private school, or did they just go with it because you wanted it? How much would your return to public school help their ability to finance your college? Do you still have friends at your public school, or would you be “starting from scratch” socially? </p>

<p>Oldfort’s point about leadership positions and getting recommendations/mentoring/nominations for honors from teachers is valid.</p>

<p>I know a couple of all-girl schools in our area. One is wonderful, supportive and caring. The other is known for having girls who think they’re “all that” and party every weekend. Sounds like you might be at one like the 2nd.</p>

<p>Either way, your post indicates you have a good head on your shoulders and will do fine either way. The only question is how happy you’ll be for the next two years.</p>

4

<p>If you’re very sure that you’ve explored your current situation objectively and in depth and there is no resolution except to transfer so be it. There is no point being miserable for another 2 1/2 years. I encourage you though to think it through one last time – ideally with the help of a competent and objective counselor. Think of how you may be able to change your situation while staying at your school. For example if the music ECs available at your school are inadequate, explore options outside your school. If you live in or close to a big enough city such options often exist. Reconsider your ECs. Explore “clubs” and/or organizations (both inside and outside your school) where you can meet kindred spirits and develop a support group of peers.</p>

<p>Transferring in junior year is likely to present its own set of social and academic difficulties. While the grass may seem greener on the “public” school side, you’re very likely to encounter some of the same issues and attitudes that you see now.</p>

<p>If in the end if you’re sure that a transfer is the only solution, I encourage you to do it now, at the end of the current semester. You’ll find the remainder of your sophomore year in the public school difficult in many ways. But if you do this you’ll find junior year in the public school much easier than it would be otherwise.</p>

5

<p>My s transferred from an elite private school his junior year to public school. Not by his choice but because we moved. It turned out just fine. He was accepted by many universities and is attending his first choice NYU. Be careful about grade transfer - meet with guidance in advance and see how your current grades will transfer. He really took a hit with his class rank because many of his private school courses were not honors classes because they were not offered as honors at the private school so he was penalized at the public school</p>

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<p>If you are interested in majoring in music in college, does the public school have a strong music program? Will you have opportunities to study music, be involved in choirs, possibly be involved in musicals at the school?</p>

<p>Separate question… are you currently taking private voice lessons? Involved with choirs? etc…? </p>

<p>Certainly for vocal performance (and most often for music education) you will be required to audition for admissions to a college program. If you are pretty certain that this is the path you want to take, you should look for the opportunities (either in school or out) that will support this. </p>

<p>Many moons ago I went to a private school that was not super geared towards students going to college for the performing arts, but was able to supplement with activities outside of school. If you decide to stay at your current school (or there is little more support at the public school you will attend), you will need to see how you can supplement.</p>

<p>:)</p>

7

<p>Public schools are not bad at all, idk why they get such a bad rap. I wouldn’t be worried about the public school not having enough academically for you. Also sounds like you just need to pick something and stay with it. First you didn’t like public school kids, now you don’t like private school kids. If you really wanna keep flip flopping based on your peers attitudes go ahead, just don’t think everything will be fixed if you switch because it doesn’t sound like it was the first time.</p>

8

<p>Our public school has better music offerings than most of the private schools around here. </p>

<p>I worry a little that you left public school originally for the same reasons you now want to leave private school. It’s something you might want to think about.</p>

<p>If you do leave, I suggest you pick a few activities and try to get as deeply involved as you can as soon as you can. Your recommendations for colleges will probably come from the teachers and contacts you make this year.</p>

9

<p>Thanks everyone…</p>

<p>Yeah, I’m not even sure myself if I’m unhappy for the right reasons. I can’t remember exactly why I was so unhappy at my old school, but I also feel bad about costing my parents $15,000+ a year to send me to a school that is forty minutes away to be miserable. </p>

<p>The public school has a spectacular musical theatre program that regularly gets awards. My school’s drama department is actually pretty dull, and the public school just got a new music director who was my favorite music teacher in elementary school, while at my current school, I have problems with my director (which is troubling for me, because if I plan on being involved in two choirs at school, plus musical theatre, I kind of need to get along with the teacher, which I don’t for multiple reasons) I take private voice, dance, and piano outside of school, and that is pretty much all my schedule allows. I started on two debate teams last year, but as my commitment to music has grown, it just becomes more of a time burden than anything else. Because of the location and cost of my school, my activities are limited. </p>

<p>If the public school will let me take the classes I want, I’ll be able to take two more AP classes than I will at my current one. It isn’t as competitive - the test scores are average, there is only one valedictorian (as opposed to my school’s 15), a 3.7 would certainly put you at the top of your class. The only thing that worried me is that at my current school, a 90% is a 4.0, but at the public one it is a 3.7. My dad says that they couldn’t change my GPA, but I guess I’d need to check with guidance. </p>

<p>I’m kind of worried because in my mind I always have this “grass is greener” idea. I think that when I go somewhere or do something new, everything will be so much better, and it never is. Thinking back, the friends that I had from my old school were so much better than the people I talk to now, but as much as I’m leaning towards transferring, I’m scared I’ll regret it. I know everyone at the other school, but I wouldn’t know how they would all treat me after disappearing for two years, because I pretty much only talk to one friend from back then. I’m kind of freaking out now, because I only have until the end of January to make a final decision, and this time I won’t be able to change my mind again. I’ve talked to my dad, and he says it’s totally a done deal if that is what I want to do, but he says my mom will have to decide. I’m nervous to talk to her because she always brags about me and my school, and how we love it, and she hates the public school. My brother will be a freshman next year, but I just don’t think it will be an easy conversation with her, because whenever I say “I really hate my school” she just assumes that I’m having a bad day.</p>

10

<p>its a good thing your parents are loaded since you are going into theatre arts</p>

11

<p>In your situation I would listen to your parents’ advice. If they support a transfer to the local public HS after discussions with you then do it. You will have your parents’ support and have them to fall back on if things seem tough. You will get a new gpa at the new school. Since your junior year counts most your previous gpa won’t matter as much as how you perform as a junior. You will do better if you are happier. You can set yourself up for success, or failure. Whatever you decide, go in with a positive attitude. You sound realistic and prepared for a change that includes pros and cons. Good luck.</p>

<p>Addenda- you have grown and matured since your 8th grade decision and will continue to evolve as a person. Do not look back at past decisions, but forward with new data about yourself every year. It may have been the best choice for you to experience your private school, it may set you up to appreciate aspects of your public school more. Do not feel you made a “cast in concrete” decision in 8th grade. Do not look back in two years at the decision you make this year. You will likely become the same adult and go to the same college no matter which of the HS’s you attend. Your decision is not something to agonize too much over.</p>

<p>Final comment- the fact that you have researched changing schools indicates to me that you want to and want support for your decision. If your parents support you then add my support as well.</p>

12

<p>I noticed that you moved initially to the private school because you didn’t like you classmates. Now you’re moving back because you don’t like you classmates. Please be carefull that it isn’t your attitude that getting in the way. </p>

<p>I knew a couple of kids in my high school that transfered in their junior year. They did, as some have mentioned, have a hard time making friends as the clicks were already well in place. An activity or sports team will help (and it sounds like you have music) as the team itself becomes a click and it basically reforms every year as the seniors move on. </p>

<p>The bottom line is you have to choose where you will be the most successfull. In that way, the options open up for you rather than close down.</p>

<p>Good luck in your decision.</p>

13

<p>I think you should talk to the music director at the public school – the one who used to be your teacher in elementary school, to get a sense of the lay of the land at the public school. Would you be able to participate in the school choir & musical productions as other juniors who have been participating for 2 years? Or is there any sort of track or progression, either official or not, that would mean you would have to jump some hurtles first (such as first completing some sort of beginning class usually taken by freshman and sophomores). </p>

<p>If the real issue is your desire to pursue music in college, then it makes sense to go to the high school that will offer the best opportunities for that. That track is entirely different than the elite college/Ivy league track. That is, if you want to get into an audition-based program in college, while grades & test scores are important, it will be your talent and audition performance that will ultimately get you in. </p>

<p>I also have a different take on the issue of the social reasons for wanting a transfer. Junior year in high school is a lot different than middle school (most of the girls will have outgrown the whole “mean girls” thing, and relations with guys are at a whole different level). Public school is different than private, especially an all-girls school. (Again, factoring in guys changes the dynamic). </p>

<p>If you plan to participate in the high school musical theater program, then you will be among a different set of kids. My observation has been that the performing arts focused students at a high school have their own separate cliques – that is, the theater kids hang out together, the band kids hang out together, etc. – probably because they spend so much time working together for rehearsals. So, if that’s the route you plan to go, you may find that you fit in very well.</p>

14

<p>S was in a similar position as you: at an all boys Catholic school and wanting to transfer to public school junior year. He liked the smaller all-boys environment for the first couple of years, but decided during soph year that he really preferred a larger and more diverse school. I was initially not in favor of the change for all the reasons mentioned on this thread, but it worked out great for him. Like you, he had gone to elementary school with many kids at the public h.s., so he knew a lot of people going in. And transferring in at the beginning of the school year is not bad in terms of finding your social niche- everyone else is adjusting to the new year too, and there is always bound to be some change. </p>

<p>If you do decide to transfer, definitely meet with the music director at the new school in the spring to let him/her know you’ll be attending and what your interests are. In the fall, really make an effort to know your teachers and guidance counselor early on- that helped S in getting good letters of recommendation. </p>

<p>One downside of S’s transfer was that the weighted grades for honors classes at the private hs did not transfer to the public, which adversely affected his weighted gpa and rank. Here in Texas, that may be important to students who want to get into UT, which admits largely based on class rank (S wasn’t interested in UT so it didn’t matter to him). However, his guidance counselor made note of this in her recommendation for his college apps, and he noted it as well on his applications under the ‘special circumstances’ section. </p>

<p>As far as academic challenge, S took AP/IB classes and found the students and coursework to be just as challenging as the private school. The public school was on the block system (private was not), which was another plus. </p>

<p>Good luck with your final decision.</p>

15

<p>*Is your public hs very competitive? As you said, a 3.7 at your current school will put you in the bottom 1/3 of your class. A friend’s daughter was a straight-A student in public middle school and went to a Catholic high school, where she graduated in the 2nd decile. Her parents hired a private college counselor who told them she might have been more competitive for college had she remained in public school, because she probably would have been at the very tippy-top of her class. *</p>

<p>This is why many Catholic schools (and other private schools) refuse to rank. They know that their students who would be ranked in the 2nd, 3rd, etc decile would be in the top 10% at most publics.</p>

16

<p>I would contact the public school and see if yiou can visit for a day. Sit in on the same classes you are currently taking and meet with the music director. This may give you a better sense of what its like. Just be sure to select a regular school day, not an abreviated day or some special event day.</p>

17

<p>^^^I completely agree that a visit to the school is mandatory. It would also help if you could attend a rehearsal or a practice after school with the music program so that you can begin to see the culture of the program.</p>