<p>Alright, so Smith is definitely in my top two. It offers EVERYTHING I want in terms of academics, however, my only qualm with it is that it's a women's college. Not that I have a beef with schools like that - it's just that I've never been in that environment before. I'm definitely friends with mostly guys. I was just wondering how current Smithies hang out with guys. Do they go to parties on the weekends at UMass or Amherst? Also - did any current students struggle with the transition? I'm just worried that the differences will be difficult.</p>
<p>I’m not a current student, but what I’ve heard repeated over and over on this board is that if you’re really used to being around guys, you’ll probably miss them initially. That being said, most Smithies went to co-ed schools before, and most transitions are just fine. If you really miss guys, you can take more classes/go to more social events at other colleges.</p>
<p>I’m personally pretty excited to just be able to focus without the guys. I’m sure I’ll miss them, but I can’t wait to live in a single sex environment.
You have your whole life to live in a coed world</p>
<p>Best comment I ever heard was: “You can find them when you want 'em, they’re out of your hair when you don’t.” </p>
<p>I forget whether it’s the Amherst rugby or ice hockey team that’s noted for having relationships measured in hours.</p>
<p>According to my D you can meet guys at parties but not always the guys you want to meet. She is still finding this a bit tough though she has had boys in her science classes esp from Hampshire which doesn’t offer a lot of core sciences. She is planning to take a class off campus maybe both semesters and actually opted for a lower paying summer job (vs a lab based job) so she would be around more of a mixed gender college age group over the summer. She loves Smith but it is an issue. On the other hand she has friends who have met and are dating guys on other 5 college campuses they met through activities, sports etc. She just doesn’t have a sched that lets her do that. It is really your perspective that counts.</p>
<p>My D, an '06 grad, fell in love with Smith during a summer program and after that, no other college matched up. Had that not been the case, my D would never have considered a single-sex school.</p>
<p>She did struggle with the single-sex issue before making her final decision, and factored in the number of guys at the other colleges in the consortium, and made her peace with the issue.</p>
<p>The truth is that if heterosexual dating and/or male relationships and/or finding a husband (LOL) is a high priority for the college years, Smith may not be the ideal place, especially for someone who is not very proactive in that area. </p>
<p>The guys who come to the Smith parties are not necessarily ideal prospects. (That was probably different when Amherst was single-sex.) Parties on the other campuses may be preferable, but my D was not a big party animal. </p>
<p>D did say that the Smithies on the debate team had lots of exposure to quality guys who were on other (generally heavily male) college debate teams. D’s choral group did partner and cross-visit with some male choral groups (the Naval Academy among them) and that did provide some very nice social opportunities.</p>
<p>But in general, D’s college dating life was relatively subdued and only picked up once she was in the real world. Nevertheless, she had a wonderful social life at Smith, doing lots of activities she enjoyed with compatible people. Many of her closest friends today are from her Smith years.</p>
<p>She got to focus on self-development during her formative years, and was not distracted by pressure to compete for the attention of available males. </p>
<p>Eventually, she brought maturity and a strong sense of self to her much more active, post-college, adult dating life. Not a bad trade-off, IMO, but likely one some young women would not make. And that would have included my D, had she not gotten sold on Smith through her summer experience. I am very glad that she did not put “getting a guy” ahead of her other goals.</p>
<p>So while my D would do it again, there is a tradeoff that should be acknowledged. So much of life is about choices and priorities.</p>
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That’s a big 10-4. Guys were an added bonus to D’s junior year away. And I’ll echo Jyber’s remark about maturity and strong sense of self. Fwiw, D is now working in a male-dominated field and doing splendidly. (Though being in the youngest decile means the office isn’t the richest social ground.)</p>
<p>ha - My D’s friend met her boyfriend on the debate team 
I also think that you either make it a priority or not and for most there it’s not - if it happens it happens. The academic work load makes the lack of distraction a bit of a plus in my book.</p>
<p>I think you guys have depicted it accurately and said it all. It’s always hard to answer this question, because the reaction to the environment is very different for each individual. </p>
<p>I would just add that you should think about not just what isn’t there (ie full time male students), but also about what IS there. It’s a chance to join a whole community of amazing women and for some girls it’s the first time in their life that they’ve ever been able to surround themselves with women who are really their peers and who have status based more on intelligence and merit than on looks and appeal to the opposite sex (thinking how the college hierarchy differs from the high school hierarchy). It’s a really unique opportunity that not a lot of people get.</p>
<p>A point perhaps I failed to sufficiently consider, S&P…another great post from you. I know that D despised the high school hierarchies, though she was clever enough to carve out an acceptable niche, being “with them but not of them” in some cases. She loved the Smith environment and a whole gaggle of Smithies are among her best friends today…and the attitudes and social skills learned at Smith have translated well into the post-undergrad work world where she has continued to grow.</p>
<p>I’m coming to the end of my first year at Smith, and I was actually reflecting on this issue with some other Smithies not too long ago. Most of us had been worried about the whole no-guys thing before we arrived on campus, but after two semesters, we were all feeling really happy about the all-women’s experience–in fact, pretty much everyone agreed that we were so busy and happy with the social opportunities that ARE here that none of us are spending lots and lots of time pining for men!</p>
<p>I’ve attended an all-girls school all my life so I think I’m a little more worried about this than someone who would experience such an environment for the first time would be. I wanted college to be something entirely different. :/</p>
<p>But what can you do, I fell in love with Smith and that’s where I’m going. Hopefully things will work out. :)</p>
<p>Quasi, I know some now-graduated Smithies who went to an all-girl high school and they are doing just fine. :)</p>
<p>^ I would be one of those all-girl high school to Smith graduates and so far I haven’t noticed that I’m particularly socially warped in any way. I think actually going to an all-girls high school gives you an advantage in that you’re already used to and amenable to the environment (though it’s totally different in college, some of the features are similar). I didnt’ have as much angst about it as some of my friends, that’s for sure.</p>
<p>It wasn’t a problem for my D when she made up her mind to go to Smith. She had already transfered from a co-ed junior High to an all-girls school with great relief, echoing TheDad’s comment: “You can find them when you want 'em, they’re out of your hair when you don’t.” It wasn’t a problem during her first two years at Smith when she was focusing on her studies and finding her feet in the American system. I would say that today, a scant month away from becoming a rising senior, it has definitely become a problem. She admits that this is partly her fault as she has found it far more complicated than advertized to take courses in the other 4 colleges. Moreover as an international student she feels more and more split between 2 cultures, unsure of where she will go even in terms of graduate studies and thus unwilling to commit to what might turn out to be a long-term relationship. She is also, very probably, a little jealous of her sister who has had a (small) number of steady boyfriends, all of which she had met during classes.
The very intense atmosphere at Smith unleavened by a little masculine immaturity is, in her opinion, rather stifling at times. And these times are becoming more and more frequent.
This should not keep you ladies from applying. As a parent I am of course overjoyed that an expensive college education is not being wasted on exploring the mysteries of male psychology, or anatomy as the case may be. As a student, my D is very grateful for everything she is getting from Smith. As a young woman of almost 21, she does feel that there is something lacking.</p>
<p>Thanks for the responses, everybody! They were very helpful. :)</p>
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<p>My daughter was never able to fit courses from the other schools into her schedule because 1. she doesn’t have a car to make the commute quicker and 2. as a science major, with lots of labs, she couldn’t work other college courses around her required Smith courses. The labs always got in the way.</p>
<p>I think the no-guys issue starts to kick in at the end of sophomore year but then doesn’t seem to matter much by the time senior year begins. Junior year abroad may help, as do summer opportunities such as jobs and internships. My D did not do JYA nor did many of her friends; they all started actively looking for guys off campus that year. As seniors, they no longer feel as compelled since they know they are about to go out into a co-ed world, with plenty of opportunities.</p>
<p>I was able to take classes off-campus, but the off-campus classes would be my only class that morning or afternoon, which is the only way I could make the commute on the bus work.</p>
<p>How hard is it to go to UMass or Amherst every weekend? And Boston maybe every couple of months?</p>
<p>Also I am an international student, so I would pretty much have to fly back home every break…it is hard to catch flight departing from boston? (or what’s the nearest airport?)</p>
<p>^ I know Hartford is the closer airport.</p>