<p>Riding home from college with strangers is not always a great idea even if you're the driver.</p>
<p>I had a car at college one year, and a girl who lived in a town on my route asked for a ride home and offered to pay for the gas. I said yes.</p>
<p>How the heck was I supposed to know that she was bringing home her pet chicken! It smelled bad and made noise the whole way!</p>
<p>iris24</p>
<p>Welcome to CC.</p>
<p>I'd have been nervous too. Given how much your D likes to travel, would she consider the hospitality field or something with airlines? At least then she could travel and have nice places to stay.</p>
<p>Hi, bookworm.</p>
<p>Thanks for the welcome. No, I think the point is NOT having "nice places" to stay. I think the point for her is the unpredictable adventure itself. Nice places to stay make her break out in hives, psychologically speaking. I suppose it's partly my fault for the way I raised her, since I have some similar tastes, but it's still tough watching your little one out unprotected in the big world!</p>
<p>one thing I learned from a previous thread I began last week after D2 (freshman) went to Philly by herself from Allentown for a concert (by bus); it's OK to worry... I worried a lot. But I did not tell her not to go, I did not try to manipulate her with fear into not going, or threaten in any manner. As far as she knew, I was preoccupied with other matters. In fact, since I was working, I told her when she contacted me, it had to be by text message, so as far as she knew I was fine.</p>
<p>However, was I worried? Yes. It's OK to feel worried - we can't shut off our feelings from one day to the next when our kids go to college. But I had to take ownership that it was my worries and she shouldn't suffer from them.</p>
<p>D1 also has made several 6-7 hour car trips between Syracuse and D.C., or Morgantown, etc. with her roommate who has friends and family around different areas. Although it's my daughter's car, she prefers to have someone else do the driving, and since her roommate doesn't have a car at school, she kind of looks forward to driving. Besides, she's more familiar with the roads because she grew up out East as opposed to my daughter. The first time they did it, I was pretty nervous, but each time since then I'm a little less preoccupied with whether or not I've heard from her. She's a senior in college now and come December, she will drive home (with her sister who is also at school out East) without a parent for the first time. Am I going to worry? Yes... but she needs to do this as another step toward independence and adulthood as she will be graduating in May. I probably worry more about the two of them spending 10 hours in a car together with no adult to facilitate arguments!</p>
<p>There are many steps along the process of encouraging our kids to grow up and have more responsibilities. You have to decide when and how you're ready to take that first step. We also have to remember that we have to pick our battles with our kids, and the older they get the less they're worth fighting, because they have the option of truly distancing themselves from us if they feel like we're smothering them.</p>
<p>So pick your battle if you need to on this one, but know that sooner or later, you will have to concede; otherwise you wouldn't be doing your job as a parent to give your kids their wings.</p>