<p>My Ds were 18 mos apart and once younger D wanted to go to BS, older D wanted to try it as well. </p>
<p>Both were accepted, but older D had a change of heart just before starting, we pushed her into it figuring it was just anxiety leaving home. The year did not go well, it did not get better and she ended up back in local public (and did fine there). </p>
<p>So I would not force or push too hard on the hesitant sib. Some people like BS, and for some it is NOT a good fit. Give her the opportunity to check it out without pressure. If you have a good local option she may end up doing much better where she wants to be.</p>
<p>As far as I’m concerned, schools would love to take twins if both of them are qualified. It feels like a cruel thing to do to separate them, and there aren’t many twins applying in any given year anyway. Then, when substantial financial need is in play, things become more unpredictable, with twins or otherwise. Note that many day schools give financial aid as well. If you are a strong candidate standing out in the applicant pool, your odds of getting money from lower tiered schools is good. I think this is one difference between well endowed private schools that would meet 100% of the financial need of all admitted students and those that would use limited funding to retain the best students they could. For the former, getting in is the main concern, and for the latter, standing out is the key.</p>
<p>I would imagine that quite a few schools would be happy to take both of them if we could pay. Without that piece, the reality is more complicated, as you have stated, Benley. I think they are both strong enough candidates to have enough of a chance of getting into selective schools to make it worth applying, they are different enough that the schools where they would “fit” are different. For instance, despite the long odds of getting in, I think Exeter would be pretty darn perfect for my son, even given its distance from our home. I would send him there if he were accepted. No way would I send my daughter that far from home right now; she’s not ready. </p>
<p>I’m not going to put any more pressure on my daughter. I did sign her up to take the SSAT so she’ll have the option to apply to BS if she changes her mind. Patronyork, that is the same situation; she really wants to be with her brother and is angry at him for wanting to go elsewhere. But if he does, technology will allow them to communicate nearly as much as at home. I’m sure we’ll all adapt.</p>
<p>Pops2017, thanks for the snapshot of Mercersburg. I have only heard good things and am looking forward to visiting. </p>
<p>Again, thanks to all for your comments and advice - much appreciated!</p>
Without that piece, the reality is more complicated, as you have stated, Benley. I think they are both strong enough candidates to have enough of a chance of getting into selective schools to make it worth applying, they are different enough that the schools where they would “fit” are different. For instance, despite the long odds of getting in, I think Exeter would be pretty darn perfect for my son, even given its distance from our home. I would send him there if he were accepted. No way would I send my daughter that far from home right now; she’s not ready. </p>