<p>Not sure if you would have much to give if you work for the government. If you did, all the taxpayers would be up in arms.</p>
<p>Heh, good point. Although what I plan on majoring in is in somewhat good demand by the government, and the pay’s pretty decent (been checking out the salaries). And of course it’s almost impossible to get fired, and I believe they also subsidize commuting costs (at least here in DC everyone’s envious of how the feds barely have to pay for commuting by Metro).</p>
<p>After reading all these posts I am SO glad that my son’s private high school teaches the kids to give back regardless of whether they are rich or poor. I have a hard time believing that all of these posters who are recipients of financial aid claim that they could not spare any money at all to give a nominal amount back to their school. This must mean that during their senior year of college they will not buy: beer, take out coffee, a magazine to read for pleasure, a meal at a fast food place, pay for a haircut, soft drinks, candy, the list goes on.</p>
<p>These schools contribute so much to you, so much that will shape your life in positive ways. Whether you are full pay or on 100 financial aid, donor funds to your school’s endowments have filled the gap between tuition/fees and the actual cost of educating you.</p>
<p>The publishing of names of non donors is wrong, but the comments of posters who are already planning to never contribute a dime to their schools is a sad statement on the entitlement class this county has produced. What a shame.</p>
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<p>Actually… I think only one person has claimed that they can’t afford to. Another said they wouldn’t until after they graduate. </p>
<p>And you don’t know their financial situation. I can personally say that my fiance (who goes to a school on full financial aid… tuition only since it was not a residential college) micromanaged (he has since gotten a better job) every single last dollar he had because he had almost EXACTLY enough money to pay bills. Whatever was leftover, he used to pay for food. Which wasn’t much and often had to borrow money or food from myself. So please, don’t assume anything about anyone else. </p>
<p>And those who said they would not contribute back to their school (which has been very, very few) were because they had major issues with their schools. That’s fair. Why would you give to something that you don’t think deserves it? As I said, I received some financial aid from my private k-8 school but still paid a ton. I will NEVER give back to that school because it was terrible. I am lucky that I love my college, but if I didn’t, then whose place is it to tell me that I’m wrong to donate my money to causes that I feel are better recipients of my money? It’s MY money.</p>
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Please don’t make assumptions about people you don’t know. Just consider yourself lucky that your child goes to private school and has a mom who browses CC in her spare time to help him with college apps. Consider yourself very privileged and don’t make haughty comments about other people’s money and what they should do with it.</p>
<p>I haven’t contributed anything financially to my college, because I don’t have enough money right now. I’m 20, I can barely afford a place to live, and I spend my entire monthly paycheck on silly little things like rent, bills, and food. I’m lucky I have a Grandma who gives me spending money from time to time so I can have enough. I went out and got a haircut last week for $10, I guess I’m so entitled for not donating it to my school!</p>
<p>But I do volunteer my TIME to my college and I think that means something too. I do community service, I’ve helped organize several fundraisers, I participate in Relay for Life and volunteer at my college’s soup kitchen from time to time. There are ways of giving back other than having Daddy write out a big check for your school. </p>
<p>There are many worthwhile causes out there to donate to. Ivy league colleges already have millions in endowments whereas there are lots of underfunded charities out there. I don’t think there’s anything entitled about people who go to Ivy schools and don’t want to pay up.</p>
<p>Again, I think some of you are misunderstanding what happened at Dartmouth. </p>
<p>Here’s an article which I think clarifies a bit
[TheDartmouth.com</a> | Class of 2010 sets record with 99 percent donating](<a href=“http://thedartmouth.com/2010/06/02/news/gift]TheDartmouth.com”>http://thedartmouth.com/2010/06/02/news/gift)</p>
<p>And an editorial which I think is “spot on:”</p>
<p>[TheDartmouth.com</a> | Senior Class Rift](<a href=“http://thedartmouth.com/2010/06/02/opinion/gottlieb]TheDartmouth.com”>http://thedartmouth.com/2010/06/02/opinion/gottlieb)</p>
<p>As far as I know, thedartmouth.com did not print the young woman’s name. Her name was published on Bored at Baker. Bored at Baker was kind of an internal “Juicy Campus” site. She was outed there, not in the paper.</p>
<p>I am not admitted to the bar in the State of New Hampshire. I am not giving legal advice. However, I can’t believe the # of people on this site who, in this thread and others, have expressed the opinion that someone can sue for defamation if someone else says something true about him. If this young woman refused to donate, saying that she refused to donate is not defamation and/or libel. </p>
<p>TRUTH is always a defense to defamation–whether it’s slander (oral) or libel (written.)</p>
<p>And, springreen, you are missing the point. The young woman in question did NOT claim she couldn’t AFFORD to give $1. As I said before, what I’ve heard is that LOTS of students said that they would give her the $1 to donate. She would not agree to this. </p>
<p>It looked like her refusal was going to cost Dartmouth $200,000. </p>
<p>There may be better causes to donate $ to–that I won’t deny. But refusing to take a dollar from someone else and agreeing to give it so the class could claim 100% participation and thus get $200,000 for Dartmouth? This is not someone who is principled in my book. This is someone who enjoyed her 15 minutes of fame.</p>
<p>Baseballmom, I have not contributed to my high school because I simply did not enjoy it, and while I learned some good values there I could have gotten about the same education on the public dime by going to public school. I suppose some of that blame could be shifted on my parents who enrolled me there back in middle school, but whatever. I got what I needed out of it, and if I’ve ever got the money to spare I’ll donate, but other organizations will be higher on my list.</p>
<p>I don’t see how it is an entitlement mentality. I pay them a certain amount of money, and in return I get an education. Pretty simple transaction. If I feel like they go the extra mile, or that I love my time there, then I’ll donate. I probably will donate to my university.</p>
<p><em>shakes head</em> didn’t read all the replies but it’s a shame that things like this happen. i don’t think any school should ask students who are graduating for any sort of donation. if they had a good experience and then later are standing on their own 2 feet and decide that that’s what they want to do, then hey, awesome. but until then, it’s ridiculous to ask/force these things.</p>
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<p>Actually, I think it is highly principled to stand up to that level of pressure, if someone is asking (demanding) something that they don’t agree with. It isn’t a matter of the merits of the Dartmouth fund – it’s a matter of the principle of being able to stand up for what you believe – or don’t believe. </p>
<p>I could imagine circumstances in which a person might harbor some sort of personal or moral objection to some aspect of a charitable organization that the majority of people support. The principled thing would be to <em>not</em> give to what you find objectionable. It is also a principled thing to respect the right of the individual to decline to participate. </p>
<p>That some outside organization is offering to donate a matching grant is irrelevant – after all, if a person has an objection to giving to the cause, then why would they want to take a symbolic action that would result in the cause they object to receiving a substantial sum of money?</p>
<p>"There may be better causes to donate $ to–that I won’t deny. But refusing to take a dollar from someone else and agreeing to give it so the class could claim 100% participation and thus get $200,000 for Dartmouth? This is not someone who is principled in my book. This is someone who enjoyed her 15 minutes of fame. "</p>
<p>Didn’t realize that learning how blindly following the herd and conforming to herd norms on pain of heavy social pressure are cherished principles to be valued, especially in our society and our educational institutions. </p>
<p>Gee, independent thought, standing up for what you believe in despite insistent pressures by the majority to conform, and the right to have your views be civilly respected despite disagreement must have fallen out of style among many alums, students, and their supporters at those two institutions for the sake of financial expediency masquerading as “voluntary charity”. </p>
<p>Moreover, I am highly disturbed by some commenters here who feel entitled to dictate to others how they should spend their money regardless of their financial circumstances. Must be nice to live in a world where one can spare enough money to donate to one’s alma mater after basic living living expenses such as housing, transportation, food, etc and assume everyone else can and should do the same. </p>
<p>What’s more disturbing is how they blithely ignore the real disturbing question:
Isn’t there something seriously amiss about soliciting alumni donations from students who have just graduated and may not have had a chance to earn enough to donate from their own resources…especially in this economy? </p>
<p>IMHO, colleges should either solicit parents directly in the last year or wait at least a year to ensure the college graduate has had enough time to land a first job and earn enough to be able to donate out of his/her own funds. In so doing, they should be much more mindful of the fact that not every student or parent has enough disposable income to be able to make such donations after tuition, family living expenses, bills, etc are all accounted for. It should go without saying that such solicitations should be conducted in a friendly and tactful manner by both the fund raisers and their supporters. Unfortunately, it seems this has been ignored by some students, alums, and supporters of this “donation” drive.</p>
<p>Moreover, if a student refuses to donate because he/she had had negative experiences as in one of the cases, that should be respected and the matter dropped. It would be nice if the college concerned and the alumni association went the extra mile to reach out to those with negative experiences, but considering the entitled mentality college fundraisers, some alums, and some supporters…I wouldn’t count on it.</p>
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<p>I don’t agree … and a very principled response by the person who offered the $200,000 match would have been to seek out this women not to yell at her but to understand her objections that would lead to the refusal to donate and see if s/he should try to influence this aspect of the school (and to donate the $200,000 anyways).</p>
<p>PS - when I was a senior at Cornell there was a program where if a senior donated $250 for the senior gift an alum matched the gift with $1750 in your name so you had made a $2000 donation (which was the minimum for some special donor category). I believe something like 15-20 students made the $250 donation … this was out of about 3000 seniors … I was amazed the number was so low.</p>
<p>3togo - $250 when you were a senior, how many years ago was that? Today, that’s cost of a dress or shoes. I think my daughter would give that amount or she would put it on my credit card (hoping I wouldn’t notice).</p>
<p>Not sure why that young woman didn’t want to give to Dartmouth. If it was so horrible, maybe she should have transferred. Unlike public high school, people do have options when it comes to college.</p>
<p>I think that is awful. I was allowed to sit in on a session in which a school was letting parents on full scholarship know there was no expectation to give backk. That the school understood financial situations were tough. I could see obvious relief in the faces of some parents who literally had to arrive on a Greyhound bus to visit their child.</p>
<p>Likewise, my oldest daughter attended a school we now dub “Satan’s school for girls.” She entered gifted but it was clear because we were full pays that they were only interested in the tuition funds (other families were suddenly needing aid in a bad economy.) They routinely messed up her schedule, went out of their way to not put requested classes on the list, - even when teachers tried to intervene, etc. At the senior overnight she slept in her car because the other students were drinking and doing drugs without any parent intervention (parents were present). And when a friend’s mother asked the school for support because her husband was on his third (THIRD) tour in Iraq - so the daughter was academically struggling and the family was under financial stress, the principal said “Perhaps your daughter shouldn’t be here.” </p>
<p>(Hence our new name for the school).</p>
<p>So no - my daughter didn’t donate to the senior class fund and I was tempted to put one “penny” on their parent donation list so they couldn’t assume we “lost” it or forgot it.</p>
<p>There are a lot of reasons why some students don’t donate. To chastise them is reprehensible. Perhaps payback is for the students in the article to go public to say why. Putting a school on notice is not a bad thing.</p>
<p>Wow. It’s funny, you’d think the people who run a private school would be more professional but nope, they’re mostly pretty terrible.</p>
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<p>There are terrible people in public institutions as well. Don’t make ridiculous posts, please.</p>
<p>I think this girl is just an idiot, plain and simple. Her actions have hurt her school, herself and her peers. No one has gained anything by this. Sad.</p>
<p>^She is an idiot for standing by her principles?</p>
<p>I’d just like to point out that maybe next year’s alumni class will give a little more thought to what their matching gift offer looks like and not include a ridiculous “100% participation” claus with it. Maybe they needed some of the very issues raise in this thread brought to their attention.</p>
<p>When someone won’t accept a dollar from a fellow student and in return give a dollar to a cause it doesn’t mean they don’t know how to give back, it means they are mad about something.</p>
<p>I give very generously. I give deliberately, I put a lot of thought into it and politeness is very big with me. The one thing all of the charities that I give to have in common is that they are polite and appreciative and they know what I am giving is a gift.</p>
<p>If someone doesn’t have extra money I don’t think they should be trying to contribute financially to anything. Get yourself situated and contribute later when time are better. Contributing time is a wonderful alternative. Melinda Gates said the same thing in a recent interview. I wish she would speak publicly more, she is really smart and interesting.</p>
<p>On another note- I run a non-profit. I have had to ask more people than I care to remember for money. The last thing you EVER want to do is tick people off. If you ask someone for money and they say no, you have to be extremely polite and thank them for their time. That person might change their mind in the future and decide that my organization IS actually worth giving to. Or they might tell other people they know who are more interested in my type of organization. If we irritate them or make them mad, then not only will they never donate but few of their friends will ever donate. </p>
<p>Additionally, you NEVER make a gift feel obligatory. Then you make it seem like a bill or a tax. People pay bills or taxes grudgingly and never pay more than minimum. A gift is something that they have control over and will hopefully pay more over time.</p>
<p>The person to blame here isn’t the student who wouldn’t donate, but whoever decided “Hey, we won’t donate this extra $20k unless the entire class makes a donation!” How could they not see what this would lead to–peer pressure, coercion, and nasty behavior.</p>
<p>It’s great that some people donate to colleges. That’s a worthy cause. But there are a lot of people, organizations, and institutions that we cross paths with in life that are worthy causes. Do you donate to the Audobon Society, your local religious organizations, Habitat for Humanity, the Red Cross, the Blue Cross, the food bank, the firefighters, political organizations, homeless shelters, toy drives, women’s shelters, the Cancer Society, breast cancer research, HIV research, animal shelters, humanitarian organizations in Africa/Latin America/India/South America, AND institutes for the arts? </p>
<p>If so, congratulations and good job. But most people can’t afford to donate to everything. I certainly can’t. And the minute a group crosses the line from “asking me for a donation” to "harassing me for a donation" is the minute I write them off forever.</p>