UC Personal Statement (Both Prompts)

<p>Prompt 1: Describe the world you come from — for example, your family, community or school — and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.</p>

<pre><code>In sixteen years of my life, I have lived through many difficult obstacles. Being an only child from a Filipino-Spanish family, I had everything in life that I could ever wish for—except a happy, complete family. I have spent my entire life without my father. I never even got to see him; he passed away seven months before I was born. My mother had to work every day to support me, which left her with hardly any time for me, but she was still there being a caring and supportive mother who would do anything for her child. I remember when there was no class for me when I was five years old, she would take me to her job because she wanted me to learn how to negotiate with costumers. I have no idea how I survived this kind of environment at such a young age. She pushed me to the limit in everyday situations where I almost gave up. I know that I have grown up to be a disciplined and an independent young man and having been raised this way helped me see that giving up will never get me anything worth having in life. My mother pushed me in every aspect of my life, especially education. She said that education is the only thing that I will always hold on to and will never be stolen.

Three years ago, my mother met the man responsible for my family moving to the United States, my Filipino stepfather. Unlike the years we spent in the Philippines, my mother can now dedicate time to me. I managed to adjust to this new environment, basically starting all over. Like all educated Filipinos, I did speak English before I came here but I was too shy to use English as my new daily language. It was a challenge—I would not talk to most people. It made both my communication skills and my confidence seem even weaker than ever. This experience has shaped me into whom I am and where I am today. It made me realize that language is powerful and that it is one of the keys to success.

My passion and talent for math and art have contributed to my aspirations as a future architect and as a civil engineer. I find the work of architects and engineers fascinating because their art and craft are always up on public display for everyone to see on a daily basis. I remember when I was a child how I loved taking apart my playthings just to see how manufacturers assembled them and how they work, then I would reassemble them back to their original design.
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<p>Prompt 2: Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?</p>

<pre><code>One of my biggest accomplishments is having skipped a grade here in United States and graduating a year earlier than typical senior students. I remember how hard it was to study back in the Philippines—there were every day quizzes, weekly tests, and we have four quarters meaning there would be four finals. Now, I get to take Advanced Placement courses and learn even more. I am proud that I am graduating a year earlier than typical senior because I know that having this is a unique opportunity for me.

Though I’m not athletic because I have asthma, I have still participated in a lot of extracurricular activities. To help myself become a part of my new high school, I joined different clubs and programs, which help me in the future. I am the Co-President of both Ecology Club and Society of Hispanic Professional Engineer (Junior Club) at my school; I am a member of American Chemical Society and Key Club, as well. I do believe that these clubs and programs will extend my knowledge to the unknown world; from saving the environment by doing my small part, like saving gallons of water, to how an engineer invents new gadgets to save our world from global warming. I also joined ACE (Architecture Construction Engineering) which, for sure, will help me understand the work of architects and engineers. My active membership has expanded my point of view and I have been given many perspectives on what engineers do. I have come to realize that engineers have to have wild imaginations in order to create things that will help shape the future. There is always something to do, something to improve and new ideas to explore. In engineering, there is no limit.

I think that this would be the best route for my future. I do believe that graduating at a young age and work, in the long run, is the best thing to do. I’m anxious to get started on my college education and look forward to the many opportunities that will be open to me.
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<p>.................................................................................................................................................
Also, I want to mention about my interest in astrophysics and that I want to prove a lot of things like wormholes, white holes, universe has a shape, and that universe will eventually stop from expanding. Should I mention that I joined THINK Together, where I tutor other students? Where should I write these ideas? How should I write these ideas?
How can I make my ending stronger?</p>

<p>Should I write my interest in astrophysics like...
For now, engineering is my chosen career—but I am also very interested in many sciences including astrophysics? I want to prove a lot of things like wormholes, white holes, and that universe has a shape that will eventually stop from expanding.</p>

<p>There are 209 words left from the thousand maximum.
Thank you!</p>

<p>Okay on prompt one you talk way to much about your mother and moving to America. This is a personal story about you and what you have done, not your parents. Being poor and having a missing father sucks… but a lot of people will also have that story. You have to express how it uniquely affected YOU directly. Or you can focus more on the part about becoming an engineer. </p>

<p>Your second prompt is a lot better. I’d focus and direct it more to a certain event.</p>

<p>I’d talk more about coming from the phil. and skipping a grade in the 1st prompt. Troubles with adjusting to the culture or vice-versa, etc.</p>